


Warriors

by Ginger_Pop, jlcamp09



Series: Amas Veritas [4]
Category: Dragon Age: Inquisition
Genre: F/M, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-11-18
Updated: 2015-12-21
Packaged: 2018-05-02 06:58:20
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 22
Words: 81,970
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/5238770
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Ginger_Pop/pseuds/Ginger_Pop, https://archiveofourown.org/users/jlcamp09/pseuds/jlcamp09
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>After the fall of Skyhold, the members of the Inquisition are scattered to the wind, their fates unknown, and it becomes life or death as they struggle to find each other once more.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

Bull groaned, his head splitting and his arm burning with a stabbing pain. He opened his eye, but all he saw was darkness. The weight of the stones still pressed down on him, making his knees tremble with the effort to hold them up. “Little help here,” he growled, hoping that there was an answer. He’d all but thrown his own hulking frame over the others as the castle wall fell, his attempt to save their lives from the destruction the dragons had caused. He heard Dorian cough and choke on the dust in the air from the debris and a relief flooded his heart. “Kadan,” he said through clenched teeth, feeling sweat trickle down the side of his face, his muscles quivering and aching in protest. “Can’t hold it much longer.”

Dorian could barely breathe, the dust from the rocks so thick around them. He was pressed up tightly against Solas and Krem, Bull at his back, saving them all from being crushed alive. “Vishante kaffas. Hold on a moment, I can’t move my hand.” He gasped as he wiggled the appendage, trying to summon magic to his fingertips. The green energy lit up the dark area and he grit his teeth as he tried to push it up against the wall that was pressing down on them all. “Solas, are you alive? Unconscious? I can’t lift this on my own.” 

“I’m fine,” Solas said, his voice a bit strangled from the dust. Like Dorian, he summoned his magic, looking to the others in the small space. Krem lay at their feet, unresponsive, and he hoped that he was still alive. He met Dorian’s eyes and gave a nod. “Together,” he said and they used their combined energy to lift the stones up and cast them aside. He sucked in a breath of fresh cold air the moment it hit his face, and his heart sank. Skyhold was destroyed. “No,” he breathed, taking a step forward, feeling numb at the sight that met his eyes. “It cannot be.”

“Ah fuck,” Bull growled, cradling his arm to himself. The fight was over, Corypheus was gone, but so was their fortress and the Inquisitor. The whole place was eerily quiet, and it made a frown cross his lips. “Everyone’s either dead or run off.”

Dorian winced as he bent over, his hands on his knees as he sucked in the clean air, his eyes flickering over the area as he did. He could see bodies littering the ground everywhere, the castle was nothing more than a pile of rubble and half of it had fallen into the valley below. A cold gust of wind blew by and it made him shiver before he stood up straight.

“Shit,” Bull breathed when he finally looked at Krem. He dropped to his knees, being careful not to jostle his lieutenant, and placed his fingers on Krem’s neck. “He’s alive,” he breathed out in relief as he sat back on his heels and ran his hand over his face. Where the other Chargers were, whether they were dead or if they had somehow escaped the chaos, he didn’t know. But he would have to find out. If any of them were still here, he would not leave them. His arm throbbed, he was certain it was broken, but he would worry about that later. He pushed himself to his feet and looked around. “We need to search for survivors.”

Dorian looked back towards Bull, wincing at the bloody arm he sported. “Amatus,” he breathed and walked over to him. “Kaffas,” he hissed under his breath and reached for his potion’s pouch, but found it missing, “Damn everything. That needs to be set or you won’t be able to wield those giant pieces of metal around any more.” He reached out looking at the break carefully. “I don’t suppose you know any healing magic, Solas?” He glanced over to the side where the elf was standing and he froze. He could see what he was looking down at. The body of the Inquisitor lay there amidst the rubble. “We will get your arm squared away and then we will search for survivors. Get Krem to a safer place as well.”

“Krem’s safe enough for the moment,” Bull said, refusing to wince as he held his arm out for Solas to examine. It was hard to believe, to see Skyhold like this. They should have anticipated something like this happening, but they’d all fallen into a false sense of security here in the mountains. No army would have been foolish enough to try to attack such a place. But then, it was not an army that had done this. It was the darkspawn magister and his fucking pet dragon. Lightning hot pain shot through Bull’s arm as Solas set it and he roared through his teeth. “Son of a bitch!” 

“Apologies, my friend,” Solas muttered, his brow creasing slightly as he looked at Bull’s forearm, then decided he was satisfied with how it was set. “I am out of potions as well. We will put it in a sling and find you some as soon as possible,” he said as he leaned over and ripped off a piece of Dorian’s already torn robe, then used it to tie up a sling for Bull. He ignored Dorian’s cry of protest. “It was already ruined. Your clothes are the least of our worries right now,” he said, turning and looking at the fallen castle again. Perhaps the eluvian would still be intact. 

“Rude,” Dorian said, a disgusted noise working its way out of his throat. He swallowed as he gave Bull one last look before he glanced around the remains of the castle, “It’s unnerving how quiet it all is. Remind me to send Morrigan a thank you card for that. Witch.” He closed his eyes before he looked back to Solas, “What about Jennifer? Your daughter? Lindsey and the others? Did anyone see them?” He grit his teeth as he looked over the rubble and took a shaky step forwards, praying to Andraste that he wouldn’t stumble over their bodies.

“Jennifer and my daughter are safe. I took them, along with Abelas and the healer Elowyn, through the eluvian when Corypheus attacked,” Solas said, making his way forward towards the crumbling castle. “If we are lucky, the eluvian is still intact. But even if it is not, they are safe in the crossroads. As for the others, I do not know. I saw all of them at some point during the fight, but once that wall collapsed on us, well…” He trailed off and gave a shake of his head. “Let us hope that they managed to escape.”

“You two go on,” Bull said, looking around at the rubble. “I’m going to stay out here and see if I can find anyone still alive. Besides, that place looks like it’s going to cave in at any minute. You don’t need my weight in there causing more damage. Just be careful.”

Dorian looked at Bull, not even bothering to hide the worry on his face. “And if we needed you to stop any more walls from crushing us to death, I suppose we will be out of luck. Or have to move faster than the wall,” he muttered but he turned to follow Solas a moment later. “Don’t fight any dragons while we are away,” he called back over his shoulder and hurried after the elf. He pressed his lips thin, seeing how disturbed Solas was at seeing the castle like this, possibly having to face the fact that they might not be able to reach Jennifer and Olivia for the time being. “What do we do if the eluvian is like the rest of the castle?”

Solas really didn’t want to think of the eluvian being destroyed and a frown pulled at his lips. “Then it means I must travel and find another,” he answered. “It is my hope that they will be smart enough to stay put in the crossroads until I can reach them. If they try to go through another, they could end up any number of places. And that will take even longer to find them.” He picked his way carefully through the ruins, his heart racing the closer they got to the room that held the eluvian. “Mind your steps.”

He made a face as he stepped carefully after Solas, the stones shifting underfoot making his heart race faster than he wanted to admit. “You mean we must travel and find another one. I hope you’ll know where to start looking. Keeping track of magic traveling mirrors wasn’t very high on my list of to do things. We were focusing on your odd little Veil project, remember?”

“I remember,” Solas said solemnly. All their research was now destroyed, save what they managed to remember on their own. “That will have to wait for now. There are more pressing matters to attend to,” he said as they reached the door. It was barely hanging by its hinges and he carefully placed his hands on it, moving it to open. His breath caught in his throat, his heart hammering in his chest.  ‘Please be unbroken,’  he thought to himself. His eyes widened when he saw it. “NO!”

Dorian stumbled into the room after Solas, wincing as he saw the crumbled section of the the roof that had fallen down and utterly smashed the eluvian. There were so many pieces, Dorian wasn’t even sure if the mirror could be repaired at all. “Vishante kaffas. Of course it is. Our luck as of late hasn’t been the best, has it?” He rubbed at his face, grimacing as he felt the dirt and grime there from the battle and he looked to Solas who knelt at the shards. “Can it be fixed? Not that we have the tools or resources to do so any more. Where is the nearest eluvian then? We will have to find some sort of transportation, lest we all freeze before we get there.”

“It cannot be fixed,” Solas breathed, his voice barely more than a harsh whisper. He didn’t know what to feel in that moment. It was foolish of course to hope that somehow a large sheet of glass had survived the crumbling of a castle, but hope he had. Now he felt a mixture of guilt, worry, anger, and disappointment. “Damn it all,” he choked out as he flung away a shard, shattering it even further on the broken stones. He pushed himself to stand and brushed the dust from his hands. He ignored the way his eyes burned as he turned to look at Dorian. “Come. We will help Bull search for survivors and then we must leave this place. I have to find Jennifer.”

Dorian nodded, reaching out and placing a firm hand on the elf’s shoulder, giving it a squeeze. “We are going to find them. You said they were safe there. We will get to them in no time,” he swore, seeing the look in his eyes. The worry, the fear there. He wasn’t a father, he didn’t know that feeling, but with Solas standing there it was almost palpable. “Come on. Let’s look around. See if the kitchens are still intact. We will need to gather what supplies we can.”

Solas set his face in determination and nodded, turning to leave the eluvian behind. His mind was ablaze with worry, he didn’t know what supplies Jennifer and the others had with them. How long they could survive in the crossroads on whatever they were carrying with them. “The faster we can move, the better,” he said as they went back to the courtyard, walking as fast as they dared to find Bull again.

The Qunari huffed as he drove his knife into the temple of a horse lying on the ground, its back legs crushed beneath heavy stones. “Such a waste,” he muttered as he stood, looking over his shoulder at the mages as they returned. The stables still blazed with fire and he turned his back on the building, the sickening smell of burning flesh permeating the air. “Haven’t found anyone alive yet,” he muttered. He could read the look in Solas’ eyes all too easy. “No luck with the mirror, huh?”

Dorian shook his head, looking down at the horse Bull had ended the pain for. He winced and shook his head. “Shattered to pieces when a chunk of the ceiling fell on it. Morrigan and the Corypheus’ dragon have completely leveled the area.” He pressed his lips thin as he let out a heavy breath, he didn’t want to tell Bull what else they had found on their way out of the Great Hall. “Amatus, I’m so sorry. Dalish, she...” He swallowed hard as the words became thick in his throat and he met the Qunari’s eyes and he gave him a sympathetic look, “She didn’t make it.”

Bull’s spine went stiff at the news and he felt pain lance his heart. He’d hoped that they’d made it out, but now he supposed that was foolish thinking. The Chargers wouldn’t have run for it. They would have stayed to fight, would have made sure that others got out safely. He looked down at the ground, his hope quickly dwindling for the others. “Damn it,” he growled in a low voice.

Dorian walked closer to him, laying a hand on his shoulder. “Bull, I don’t want to try and make this any worse for you, but I don’t want to sugar coat it either. Your Chargers are the best, they wouldn’t have left you here alone while you were still fighting to save everyone. Krem stayed. Dalish stayed. I fear the rest have stayed as well. We should locate them, if we can, before we move on.” He bowed his head, watching Bull’s face, feeling the man tense beneath him. “I’m so sorry, Amatus.”  

Though it hurt, he knew Dorian’s words were true. “No reason to be sorry,” he said in a heavy voice as he stood straighter and began to walk, his eye searching for any sign of his men. “They died with honor. But I will not leave until I find them all.”

Solas worried that perhaps they were wasting time, but he would not argue with Bull now. It was as if he could feel the Qunari’s energy, the emotion from him. Arguing now could provoke a dangerous response and that was something they definitely did not have time for. He moved among the rubble, spreading out to cover more ground, and with every face he saw, his heart sank more. Many of them he recognized, even if he did not know their names. Faces of soldiers, healers, servants. Far too many had died there that day. He turned sharply as he heard a pained groan and he ran towards the sound, using his magic to lift a large pile of rubble. “BULL!” he shouted.

Iron Bull turned and ran towards the elf, skidding to a stop when he saw three of his Chargers lying there. Skinner, Rocky, and… “Grim,” he gasped and dropped to his knees next to the man who was struggling to breathe. He grasped his hand, seeing the fear in his eyes, the pain in his expression. His chest was cracked open, his wounds beyond the healing of any mage, potion, or healer. “Shit.”

Dorian felt tears gather in his eyes, his face growing hot as he came to a stop next to Bull, looking down at the barely alive man. So few words, but it was his actions that spoke the loudest. He held a hand to his mouth as he gazed on. He wasn’t certain how much more heartache his soul could take, how much more any of them could take. He turned and looked to Solas, he was just as lost as the rest of them. He still had hope. 

It made Solas sick to see such pain, both the physical pain Grim was in and the emotional pain from Bull. And there was still the fear and the worry of the unknown for the rest of their people. “Bull,” he said softly, “He is suffering.”

Bull swallowed hard at Solas’ words and he looked down at Grim. He absolutely hated the thought of this, he would loath himself for it, but it was the right thing to do. He’d taken mercy on a damned horse, could he not do the same for one of his men? His fingers curled around the handle of his knife, pulling it from his boot. A sickening feeling pooled in his stomach, making his skin crawl as he rested the tip of the knife over Grim’s heart. “You ready?” he asked softly.

Grim blinked up at his Boss and he managed a bloody smile for the man, reaching up with a trembling hand to cover Bull’s fingers on the dagger. The tears in his eyes slipped down his cheeks and he nodded his agreement, keeping his gaze on the Qunari. He licked his lips, tasting the coppery blood there before he mouthed silently to him, ‘Horns up.’

Bull gave a nod. “Horns up,” he answered. A quick jerk of his shoulder was all it took to plunge the dagger into Grim’s chest, and he hated himself for it. He withdrew it just as quickly, and grabbed up Grim’s hand again, holding it until he saw the life go out of the man’s eyes. He grimaced, his face screwing up as his hand trembled, knowing he had done the right thing, the merciful thing, and still despising himself for it. He drew several harsh breaths through his nose before he finally released Grim’s hand and stood again. “We need to find Stitches, then build a funeral pyre. I’ll not leave them here like this. They deserve better.”

Dorian nodded, reaching up and wiping the tears off of his face as he looked around the smouldering rubble. “He cannot be far,” he said, reaching out for Bull’s good hand and slipping his own inside of it. He held on to Bull tightly, afraid that if he were to let go, the man would be taken from him so quickly, he would be left spinning in the aftermath. He pressed his lips together, looking at the position of the sun and judging how much light they had to work with. They still needed to find something for travel. Shelter. Everything. “Perhaps Stitches has something, medicine, a poultice. Maybe he’s alive.”

Bull shook his head. “I’m not holding onto hope for that,” he muttered as they walked, occasionally moving aside pieces of stone wall as they looked for Stitches. It didn’t take long to find him. It looked as though he’d been flung across the yard at some point; several gaping wounds in his chest as if a dragon had snapped him up and thrown him away again. “At least I know,” Bull said as he looked down at the body. An anger boiled up inside him and he released Dorian’s hand. He feared he might break the mage’s hand in that moment. “Damn it all!”

Dorian squeezed his eyes shut and turned his head away from the scene. He looked to Solas who had came to stop beside him. “Such pointless death. They deserved better, they all deserved better.” He ran a hand through his hair as he watched Bull close Stitches eyes and he let out a heavy sigh. “Come on. We should build the pyre, lay these men to rest.”

There wasn’t much wood left in Skyhold that hadn’t already been burned by the dragons, but they managed to find enough to suit their purpose. Bull let Dorian and Solas help him lay out the bodies of the Chargers and the Inquisitor on the pyre. “Sorry guys,” he muttered, his heart heavy as he lit the wood and stepped back. His lips pressed to a thin line as he watched the flames lick at the wood. He’d tried to wake Krem for this, but he was still out cold. 

Solas stood beside Bull and Dorian for what he thought was an appropriate amount of time before he spoke. “We should go soon. There is nothing more here for us. I will venture into the kitchens, if possible, and see if there are any supplies we may take with us. Food will be scarce now in the middle of winter,” he said. He saw Dorian about to protest and held a hand up to silence him before he spoke. “We have found everyone we could. With any luck, the others made it out and we may find them on the road. Though they have several hours head start on us.” They had not found the bodies of any members of the inner circle, save for the Inquisitor, though there were many bodies that had been unidentifiable due to being burned by dragon fire. “Wait here,” he instructed, then headed back towards the castle.

Dorian watched as Solas disappeared into the rubble and he turned to look around the courtyard. He spotted what looked to be half of a wagon sticking out under some of the wrought iron gate that used to be part of the entrance. He pressed his lips thin and walked over to it. “I don’t suppose there are any horses left alive?” he asked over his shoulder as he summoned his magic forth, using it to free the cart from the debris. Shockingly, it was still intact. Mostly. 

Bull looked at the still-burning stables, then turned and looked at Dorian again. “You wanna check?” he deadpanned, jerking his thumb over his shoulder. He gave a heavy sigh as he looked over at Krem. “We’re going to need it if he doesn’t wake up soon. I can’t carry him that far. Not with my arm busted like this.”

Dorian winced and nodded, turned to the stables and sending a wave of ice towards the flames, letting them die down. It was shocking how much quieter the area was once the fire was out and he nearly sobbed in relief when he heard the whinny of a horse from the back. It must have been trapped between the castle wall and the burning barn. “Kaffas, there’s one left!” he said as he picked his way through the debris. He really hoped Krem woke soon, he must have been knocked harder in the head than the rest of them. He hoped for Bull’s sake that the man would stir soon.

“At least one fuckin’ thing went right,” Bull muttered, watching as Dorian soon returned with the spooked animal. Its mane looked to be scorched and he could see the whites of its eyes as Dorian led it over, but it looked unhurt. The corner of Bull’s mouth twitched as Dorian spoke softly to the horse in his native language, and it seemed to calm. “Any luck?” he called out when he saw Solas returning as well.

“Little,” Solas answered, adjusting the pack over his shoulder. “Some dried meat, nuts, cheese,” he muttered, sighing and giving a shrug as he looked at Dorian with the horse. “It isn’t much, but it should get us through a few days at least.” He set the bags in the wagon, then looked at Krem on the ground. “Let me help you, Bull,” he offered, and he and Iron Bull lifted Krem into the back of the wagon. It looked like Dorian had the horse hooked up and ready to go. “I will drive.”

Dorian nodded as he handed the reins to the elf, “That’s good, I would hope that you would know at least where to start looking for these eluvians. We will have to keep our eyes out for food and blankets. It’s the dead of winter and we won’t survive for very long out on our own like this. I can think of plenty of people who would like to destroy what’s left of us now that the Inquisition has been quite literally ripped apart. With us scattered about like this, it wouldn’t take much.”

Solas climbed into the front of the wagon, his eyes narrowing at Dorian’s words. He waited for the other men to climb in the wagon before he urged the horse forward. “I’d like to see them try.”


	2. Chapter 2

“VAAARRIIIIIC!” Cassandra yelled hoarsely as she tromped along the riverbank, trying to make her voice heard above the rushing of the water. She’d been at it for hours, the sun was now starting to sink below the horizon, and still there had been no sign of Varric. Her eyes stung from the tears that had long since stopped flowing, and the cold wet air slapped at her face. “VARRIC!” she called again, straining to hear an answering reply. “Maker damn it all.”

Lindsey wrapped her arms tighter around herself, cradling Cullen’s puppy inside her coat as they followed Cassandra. She was worried for her friends, for her sister. But her hope for Varric was dwindling. Even if he’d somehow managed to survive that fall, she didn’t see how he could have lived through being tossed around in that current. Even a strong swimmer would’ve had a difficult time of it. And Varric couldn’t swim at all. She sniffled and swallowed, looking down at her boots as they crunched over the snow-crusted rocks. “He didn’t make it,” she muttered to Cullen, keeping her voice low so Cassandra wouldn’t hear her. “I know she doesn’t want to believe it, but there’s no way. There’s just no way.”

Cullen nodded, closing his eyes as he hugged Lindsey tighter to his side as they walked. His other hand held the reins to a horse they had grabbed on their way out on the bridge. “It would have taken a miracle for anyone to have survived a fall like that. The fall alone would have been enough to kill lesser men. Then the castle fell and,” He paused and looked at the river, the swift current still carrying away burnt lumber from the crumbling remains of Skyhold, “With Varric? It would have taken something extraordinary to have saved him.” He shivered as a gust of icy wind blew past them. “Cassandra! We need to make camp. We will freeze if we do not! We have to…” He swallowed hard and closed his eyes, “We need to make for warmer areas. The Hinterlands is our best bet.”

“NO!” she shouted as she rounded on him, her eyes blazing. “He is still alive! I will not stop until I have found him!” Her shoulders shook, but not from the cold. If they thought for one instant that she would abandon Varric now, they had lost their minds. She pressed her lips to a thin line and stomped towards her companions. “If you want to turn back, then by all means. But I will not abandon him now. He is alive out here somewhere. I know he is!”

Lindsey cringed at Cassandra’s outburst. “We’re not leaving you, Cass,” she said in an almost timid voice. “But the sun is setting. It’s only going to get colder. You won’t be able to keep looking for him if you come down with pneumonia or if you fall over frozen!” She cast a glance at Cullen, wanting to follow what he said, but she knew Cassandra was too stubborn to give up. “Let’s make camp. We can look again in the morning. We’ll help you.”

Cassandra stared hard at both of them, warring with herself. She stood a better chance of finding Varric with both of them helping her. It was dangerous for anyone to travel alone, even a skilled fighter like herself. But she didn’t want to stop for the night just yet. She finally gave a curt nod. “Just a little bit more and then we can make camp,” she finally agreed, her voice tense, and she turned on her heel to keep walking along the bank. “VARRIC!”

Cullen pressed his lips thin and he looked to Lindsey. “Come on, why don’t you get on the horse? I don’t want you to over exert yourself more than what we’ve already been through.” He steered her towards the saddle. “You’ll be warmer up there out of the snow.” He licked his lips as he looked over at Cassandra as she curled her arms around herself and walked dutifully down the river bank. “We will try to convince her to move on after she’s had some rest.”

“She’s not going to give up easily,” Lindsey answered as she let Cullen help her up on the horse’s back. She shivered in the cold wind, one arm still around the puppy who snuggled deeper into her coat. A frown pulled at her lips as she thought about Varric, where he might be if there was even a chance that he might still be alive. It made her eyes burn to think of him either way. Dead, or nearly frozen to death in the icy cold river. She squeezed her eyes shut as she gripped the saddle horn. “I should have seen this coming,” she gasped out, feeling wretched and guilty. “I should have been reading my cards more, I should have done something.”

“Hush, love,” Cullen said, patting her leg, “There was no way that any of us could have foreseen this coming, especially with everything that has been changing since you and your sister have come to Thedas. And before you say it, no, it wouldn’t have been better if you had never come here. I can’t imagine this life without you. Our lives have been blessed since you have walked into them.” 

She scoffed at that. “Blessed? I think Varric would beg to differ with you,” she muttered. “What happened with Erimond and now this? None of this would have happened to him if it hadn’t been for us.” Perhaps she was being too emotional, but she couldn’t seem to help it lately. Now she understood why her sister had been so “pleasant” while pregnant; it was like she had no control over her own damn feelings. “Sorry,” she whispered, scrubbing at her eye with the heel of her hand. “I just want to find my sister and the others. I hope they all got out of there alive.”

“Blessed,” he repeated, reaching up and taking her hand, “If it hadn’t been for you, they would have never gotten together. Jennifer and Solas wouldn’t have their beautiful daughter. You and I wouldn’t have the amazing life that is growing inside of you. Without you, I would have been alone, still fighting with my addiction. You didn’t cause Corypheus to attack us.”

Cassandra continued on, calling out Varric’s name over and over as she went, even as the sun sank beyond the horizon. There was no moon tonight and even with the snow, it was hard to see anything. Cullen and Lindsey looked nearly frozen and miserable, and she felt guilt in her chest. “We can stop,” she finally muttered, stopping to pick up some pieces of wood to build a fire. “Maybe he will see the flame and come to us.”

Cullen nodded and led them over to an outcropping of rocks that was shielded by several fir trees. “This will have to be the best we can do for the moment. We will have to see what we have left for food. We cannot stay out here for much longer, we will need to hunt or make our way to the Crossroads.” He winced at the look Cassandra gave him.

Cassandra glared at him, narrowing her eyes. “We will hunt for now,” she said in a deadly low voice. “Once we have found Varric, THEN we can go to the Crossroads in the Hinterlands. With any luck, the other members of the Inquisition will think to go there as well. We may decide what direction to go after that.”

Lindsey let Cullen help her down off the horse and she moved to sit, feeling frozen and saddlesore. She felt like crying, but didn’t because she was almost certain her tears would freeze to her cheeks at this point. “And to think I used to bitch about your room being cold because of the hole in the ceiling,” she muttered, wrapping her arms tighter around herself as she watched Cassandra building a fire. “Right now I’d give anything to have a roof at all.”

Cullen nodded, pulling the bag off of the horse saddle and sat down next to Lindsey as he opened up the pack and dug around for provisions. He pulled out a few things of dried meat and passed Lindsey a portion before he handed some over to Cassandra. “I know you don’t want to accept it, but Varric… the chances of him surviving that fall, it’s not promising.”

“I. Don’t. Care,” Cassandra snarled at him. “If there is even the slightest chance that he could have lived, then I will not give up on him.” She snatched the piece of meat out of Cullen’s hand, taking a little too much enjoyment from the way she ripped it with her teeth. She stared at the slowly growing fire, shaking her head. “He is alive. I don’t care if you don’t believe it. I know it.” Varric’s last words echoed in her head.  I’ll see you later.  She bit into the dried meat again, her head snapping backwards as she tore off another piece. “He is not dead.”

Lindsey shrank back against the outcrop they sat under, warily watching the Seeker. Cassandra was frightening when she was in a mood like this. She nibbled at the dried meat, a smile crossing her lips when the puppy’s nose poked up from the collar of her coat, sniffing. “Here,” she said and tore off a piece, feeding it to him. She finally looked at the Seeker, her eyes apologetic. “Cass, I don’t want to believe it either, but think about it. That was a huge fall. And even if he survived that, the river is treacherous. Varric can’t swim. I don’t think…”

“I don’t care what you think!” Cassandra shouted. She felt her eyes burn and she didn’t even care if they saw the tears slip down her cheeks. “If you want to go, then go! But I will not! There is not a damn thing you can say that will change my mind! And there is not a fucking thing in this world or the next that will stop me from finding him,” she hissed, her jaw set, her shoulders shaking again as she glared at the two of them. She normally didn’t curse like that, but this was Varric they were discussing and she refused to give up on him.

Cullen watched Cassandra for a moment, the words tasting like ash in his mouth. “And what if he is alive? What if he’s dead? What then? Do we keep traveling until we are all dead? Until we stop, frozen in the valley?” He shouldn’t say it, but he was thinking of his love and his unborn child. He couldn’t leave them.

“If he is alive, then we must find him!” she insisted. “He will be soaking wet and alone in this weather. Who knows what injuries he may have sustained in that fall. And if he is dead… then at least I will know. If the situation were reversed, would you stop? If it was her, would you abandon her?” Cassandra demanded, pointing a finger at Lindsey. “Look me in the eye and tell me you would stop searching, Cullen.”

Cullen paused at that, looking to Lindsey as he thought about if she had been the one to go over the falls instead of Varric. His heart gave a lurch at the thought and he reached for her hand as he gasped out in pain. “I wouldn’t have. I would have kept going until the end of time,” he breathed out, tears threatening to slip down his face, “But Lindsey… she’s with child, Cassandra…”

Cassandra’s eyes widened. She hadn’t heard this news yet. Of course, it hadn’t even been a full twenty-four hours since they’d all returned to Skyhold. It was hard to believe; it seemed an age ago since they’d returned. “I… That doesn’t change anything about this conversation!” she snapped. She paused and looked at Lindsey. “Congratulations,” she said quickly before looking at Cullen again. “It makes no difference and you know it. You would still go looking for her anyway and you know it. And if you are concerned for her safety while looking for Varric, then take her to the Hinterlands in the morning. But I will not stop.” She breathed heavily through her nose, shaking her head as she got to her feet. “Get some rest. I will take first watch,” she said and stomped through the surrounding evergreen trees to get a clearer view of their surroundings.”

“Cassandra! What if you were pregnant with Varric’s child and I were missing?!”

She paused in her steps, thinking about it for a moment. “I would still look for you,” she answered in a low voice without turning to look at him. “Because you are my friend and I care.” And with that, she continued on to find a good place to keep watch.

“Cullen, it’s okay,” Lindsey said softly, seeing the stress and the worry in his face. “We can keep looking for a few days, can’t we? I mean, I think it’s a lost cause. And I want to find my sister. But I don’t want to leave her alone out here either. I don’t know what to do.”

Cullen looked towards Lindsey, his eyebrows furrowed as he gazed at her. “I just don’t want to see you or the baby hurt, my love. I know Varric is important to you. More than most because of what you both have gone through together.” He winced, trying to think of what he would do if Lindsey were missing and Varric and Cassandra were trying to pull him back. He nodded. “The choice is obvious. I would stay for as long as it took, until I found a body for closure. Andraste help me.”

She nodded. “Then that is what we will do,” she said softly as she laid back, tugging him to lay down with her. It wasn’t very comfortable, but she was exhausted and knew he had to be too. She hated the thought of Varric out there somewhere in this freezing weather, alone, hurt, if he was even alive at all. A shiver ran through her and she snuggled closer to Cullen as the puppy wiggled again and stuck his head through the top of her coat to lick Cullen’s chin. “Baby and I will be fine. I know you’ll keep us safe. If we can find him…” She paused and swallowed, “Find his body, it’ll give her closure and then we can move on.” A shaky breath escaped her. “I hate this. I don’t want him to be dead, either, but I just... I just don’t think he made it.”

Cullen hugged her closer, leaning into the puppy’s gentle licks and he pressed his forehead against hers. “We will do what it takes then. I will go out hunting tomorrow, we will not starve while we look for him. It is what I would do, but since she cannot, I will do so in her stead. Stay near Cassandra. She will keep you safe while I do go out on my own. We’ve come so far on our own, love, through so much. If I lost you or the baby… I’m not certain I would survive.” 

“Shhh, you’re not going to lose us,” she promised, running her fingers through his hair before she pulled her hand back, scooting as close to him as she could without crushing the puppy between them. “Just be careful when you go out tomorrow. Don’t go too far. I don’t want to lose you either.” A small smile crossed her lips. “Bring us back something good for me to cook up for you.” She pressed a kiss to his lips, then closed her eyes as her exhaustion became too much to fight anymore. “Goodnight, love.”


	3. Chapter 3

Ellie sat on the ground in the crossroads, watching Jennifer as she paced back and forth in front of the eluvian. She glanced over at Abelas, but looked quickly away when he glared back at her. All this waiting was maddening, especially since no one was talking. The only sounds were of Jennifer’s shoes and the occasional gurgle of the baby in her arms. 

She fiddled with the buns in her hair, the pale blonde strands falling down like they usually did. She huffed, blowing them out of her face, and finally decided to speak. “Perhaps we should think of moving on, milady,” she said, her eyes still following Jennifer as she walked. “Solas said he would come back, but it has been hours. Maybe something happened to the mirror? If we could find a way out of here, we could meet with him somewhere else.”

Jennifer pressed her lips thin, looking back to the eluvian that they had come through. It was black and cold, like so many others in the crossroads. Something had happened on the other side to break the mirror and it was driving her insane as they waited and waited for Solas to come for them. He had said to wait on the other side, even if this were to happen. She wasn’t even going to entertain the idea that something had happened to him, her sister, and all of the rest of their friends, loved ones. “Solas said to stay here,” she said firmly, rocking the little baby in her arms, “What happens if we leave and he comes looking for us?” 

Ellie chewed the corner of her mouth, looking down at the ground for a moment. “What happens if he comes looking for us and finds we’ve starved to death here? The only things I managed to grab were some potions and supplies from the infirmary. If he can’t come through that mirror, how long will he have to travel to find another one? I don’t know anything about them, but it seems to me that they’d be few and far between.” She looked up at the other woman, seeing the conflict in her eyes. “Is there anywhere else he’d think to look for you? Surely he knows that something went wrong with this one. He wouldn’t expect you to stay, would he?”

Abelas watched as Jennifer stopped her pacing to tilt her head in thought. He sighed out, stretching his leg a little, “It might be wise to try heading for the eluvian that would be the nearest one to Skyhold.” He looked around; there were eluvians everywhere, most of them broken. He recalled what he had memorized of the old pathways, back when they were all still intact. “The nearest one that I can think of would be what the elves call Dirthavaren. I believe I can direct us to the connecting eluvian from here, but it will be a bit of a walk. Half a day at the very least. More because of my leg.”

Ellie got to her feet, brushing her hands off. “Well then we’d better get walking,” she said and walked over to offer Abelas a hand up. She nearly laughed at the way he scowled at her, but he took her hand and she helped him to his feet. “Out of all damned people to have survived, it had to be me. That’s what you’re thinking, right? Well get used to it. I’m not done irritating you yet. It’s far too much fun.”

He pressed his lips thin as he grabbed up his walking stick, wondering if it would be worth it to knock her on the back of the head with it. “I assure you, it is I who should have died if anything, lest I still be suffering your company. I am surprised you came back to save me, despite what you think of my company. Or were you coming by just to make certain that a section of the castle fell on my head?” 

She felt her face go hot, all the way to the tips of her pointed ears. “Nooo,” she drawled, meeting his eyes. “I would never wish that on you. That would please you far too much. Besides, what better way to annoy a man that wants to die than to keep him alive?” she countered. A smug smile worked across her lips. “Now get moving, gimpy. We need to help Lady Jennifer find Solas.” She hiked her pack up on her shoulder and gestured for him to lead the way. “I assume you know where we’re taking us, right? Or are you getting forgetful in your old age?”

“I would explain to you how one travels amidst the eluvians, but I fear such a complexity would be lost on your simple mind,” he hissed back at her as he stepped carefully, leaning on the stick as best he could. Oh how he wished he had his full strength back. At least then he could suffer her disrespectful attitude without the humiliation. “Be wary, spirits and demons have been known to traverse these pathways as well. If you can be vigilent, I would suggest you do so now.”

Ellie scowled at him. “Yes, this  _ simple mind  _ that somehow managed to save your life,” she growled. “Ungrateful old bastard.” She grit her teeth and fell into step behind Jennifer, her eyes still narrowed at Abelas’ back. Out of all the men and women she’d taken care of at Skyhold, he irritated her the most. How he managed to get under her skin like that, she didn’t know. “Lady Jennifer,” she said in a cheery tone, “Would it lower your opinion of me to see me beat a cripple with his own walking stick?”

“I think you both should just fuck each other and get it out of your system so we can travel peacefully to the other eluvian,” she muttered as she kept walking, stopping short when Abelas halted suddenly, his head turning to look over his shoulder at her, a look of horror and disgust on his face. She smirked as she looked to Ellie and saw the same expression. “You two have been going at it since day one.” 

Ellie felt her stomach clench. “Yeah, okay, so you’ve lost your mind,” she muttered before she stormed forward in the direction Abelas had been leading them. “I’d offer to whack you with Abelas’ stick, but you’re already mental enough as it is.” She huffed, shaking her head in disbelief. “That and I’m relatively certain you’re tougher than I am,” she admitted. “Never seen a woman labor for three days the way you did without much complaint,” she said, recalling when Olivia had been born. 

Abelas snorted at both of the women. He respected that Jennifer was Solas’ mate, but she was really wearing his last nerves thin with her remarks. He shot a glance over at Ellie and pressed his lips thin. She was not unattractive for one of her kind, but it was her attitude that made her unsavory to him. Could she not see that? 

Ellie narrowed her eyes at him and quirked an eyebrow. “Why’re you staring at me? Want to paint my picture?” she asked, smirking when he looked away again. Gods, she’d like to kick him. But letting him get to her wasn’t going to help their situation, so she looked around at the surroundings instead. “This place is a bit creepy,” she commented to no one in particular. She’d never seen anything like it. “Let’s just get where we’re going. Any place is better than here.”

For hours they walked at an irritatingly slow pace, none of them speaking much, save for the bickering between Abelas and Ellie. Abelas finally seemed to walk a little faster, his eyes set on an eluvian that didn’t seem as dark as the rest of them. 

“Is this it? That Dirtha-whatever it is?” Ellie asked as they finally reached it. She eyed it warily, not certain if she trusted the thing. It was huge and intimidating, and all of this seemed very strange to her. Not to mention she had just about reached the breaking point of her temper with Abelas. “Where will it take us?”

“Dirthavaren,” Jennifer said, looking over to Ellie, “Means ‘the promise.’ And If my memory serves me correctly, this is the Exalted Plains,” she said as she looked up at the mirror. She remembered a few places in that area that had Crossroad like trees scattered about. “It makes sense. I hope Solas will be able to find us here.”

Abelas raised an eyebrow at the woman. How odd for a shemlen to know at least that much about the world. Then again, she was mate to Solas, perhaps this was what the other elf saw in her. It was sad to see this human know more than an elf about a world that they once were the dominant race. “We have little choice, but it is the closest mirror to Skyhold that I can think of. If we remain here, we will starve long before Solas can reach us.”

“Huh,” Ellie said, slightly impressed by Jennifer’s knowledge. She looked between the two of them before looking at the eluvian again. “Good enough for me. Let’s go through and see if we can find something to eat. I’m starving.” Though she didn’t move. She blinked at Abelas expectantly. “Well? Is there some secret password or what? I don’t know how these things work!” she snapped, crossing her arms and looking away from him, feeling her face go a bit hot. It made her feel stupid for some reason and she didn’t like it at all.

Abelas looked at her and shook his head, stepping forward and raising a hand at the mirror while he muttered the password under his breath, “Fen’Harel enansal.” The mirror glowed blue and the surface came alive as if it were some form of living water. “The keys are different for each eluvian. However, Fen’Harel developed a lockpick of sorts for them.”

“Fen’Harel?” Ellie asked, taking a step back from the mirror and looking at it with distrust. “I don’t know if we should trust it. I mean, everyone’s always told me all my life to avoid anything to do with the Dread Wolf. If this is some trick of his…” She eyed Abelas for a moment. “I would think you of all people wouldn’t trust something of Fen’Harel’s. I mean, weren’t you around when he tricked all the old gods or whatever that old story is? Maybe we really should just wait for Solas. I can go hungry for a while.”

Abelas pressed his lips thin, giving her a look, his eyes flickering to Jennifer who shrugged and turned to walk through the portal herself. He rubbed at his temples. “Fenedhis lasa,” he muttered to himself before he looked to Ellie again, “Elven legends are wrong. He saved the people and all the thanks that he received was his name as a curse while the murderers he banished for an eternity of torment have been revered and praised as undeserving gods. Stay here and starve if you prefer. Let your superstitions control you. The Dread Wolf comes either way.” He turned and stepped through the mirror, not waiting for her response.

Ellie blinked as she suddenly found herself alone. “Oh shit no, I’m not staying here by myself!” She hurried after him, squinting as her eyes adjusted to the new light. “Okay, let’s say I believe you when you say that everyone everywhere got it wrong. That doesn’t mean you have to speak to me in that condescending tone,” she said. “It’s not my fault that I believe what I was taught, what I heard from other elves. What sense would that make?” she asked sarcastically. “You know, people might be more interested in what you have to say if you didn’t look down your nose at them while talking.”

“Perhaps it is that I just do not care if other people are interested in what I have to say. You will believe what you want to believe regardless of what I tell you,” he said as he turned to look over his shoulder at her as she came out of the mirror. Another word and the mirror closed behind her. It was always best not to leave doorways open.

Jennifer had to roll her eyes as she moved to a soft, grassy spot and laid her baby down in the grass while she dropped her pack on the ground and dug into it for supplies to change her. “I’m going to make you two hold hands until you both can get along with each other. Shit, I’ve heard five year olds get along better than you two adults. Knock it off already. If we can’t get along and work together, we aren’t going to make it very far.”

Ellie was stung by Abelas’ words, and irritated at Jennifer’s threat as though she were some sort of child. “Maybe I do want to believe you,” she hissed at Abelas. “Or at least I would be interested in hearing what you have to say, since your old ass was there when it happened. Not that you care though, right? Abelas doesn’t give a shit about nothin’. Abelas doesn’t care if he lives or dies. Abelas doesn’t care if he insults every person who comes near him, even if those people have shown him nothing but kindness!” She pressed her lips together so hard they trembled. “You’re a dick,” she spat and stormed off. “Hope Solas finds you all soon. I’m out of here.”

Jennifer let out a heavy sigh as she watched Ellie stomp off. She loved her to pieces, she had been amazing with her during the pregnancy, but she had to admit, she could be a bit of a firecracker at times too. “We need to stay together, these plains are dangerous enough as it is.” She looked over at Abelas, “Let her cool her jets a for a little bit, then you are going to go get her, apologize and come back. First, you can build a fire. You walk well enough.”

“Don’t know why I wasted my time,” Ellie muttered to herself as she walked, wanting nothing more than to put as much space as possible between herself and Abelas. She didn’t mind Jennifer so much, save for the scolding, but Solas would find her soon enough. She would be fine. But Abelas… “Asshole,” she growled under her breath. “Should’ve left him to die at Skyhold. Would’ve been better than putting up with this shit,” she muttered, though her heart sank to say those words. She just didn’t have it in her to hate someone enough to wish death on them, no matter how much they annoyed her. “Stupid, stuck-up, self-important - oh!” she cried as she walked directly into someone and fell back on her rear. “F-Forgive me. I didn’t see you,” she stammered.

The man turned around, looking from the men in his band that he had been addressing and he smirked. “Well, well, what have we got here, boys?” He licked his lips as he looked her up and down. “Mmm, usually we don’t get to see many pretty things like you around these parts. How about you stick around for a while? Warm me and the boys up.”

Her eyes widened at the way he looked at her, the leering glares of his men. She scrambled backwards on her hands, fear lancing through her. “I… I’ll just be going,” she said breathlessly and turned over to push herself up, but cried out again as the bandit’s full body weight fell on top of her, crushing her back to the ground. “No! NO!” she sobbed as his hands grabbed at her, tearing at her clothes, her hair, his body pressing obscenely against her. “Please stop!”

He chuckled as he let his hands roam over her body, grinning as he leaned down and sucked hard at her neck. “Knife ears shouldn’t be out wandering in the middle of the woods,” he murmured as he squeezed her breast hard, kneading it with his hand, “One of you blokes come help hold her down while we make her a little more comfortable. I think she’s wearing far too many clothes.” 

Ellie struggled against him, her heart racing, tears streaming from her eyes as she tried to get away. But her small frame was no match for the hulking brute on top of her. “Please don’t do this!” she pleaded as they tore at her clothes, two of the men pinning her down. Her skin crawled and bile rose in her throat. “Someone help!” she screamed, fear and loathing coursing through her veins. This couldn’t be happening. “Please, please! Don’t! Stop it! You’re hurting me! Please stop!”

The man only laughed and lifted two fingers to his lips, laving them with spit. “Watch this, boys. I’m gonna put some color in those pretty cheeks of hers.” He shifted, letting his hand drop lower, going for the apex of her thighs when suddenly he found himself sailing through the air and hitting a tree hard enough to crack his head on the trunk, dazing him. 

Abelas growled as he threw magic at the other men holding Ellie down, ice creeping along the ground and forming jabbing spikes to spear the men on them. He set another man on fire and when they were away from her, he went and stood protectively in front of her. “Disgusting shemlen, that will cost you your lives.” He leveled his gaze at the ringleader struggling to get up off of the ground. He sneered at him when the man slurred at his other men to kill Abelas. “I’d like to see you all try.”

Ellie gasped as she looked up, seeing Abelas protecting her. How he’d managed to catch up to her, she didn’t know, but she was grateful for it. She cringed as more flashes of magic rent the air, she heard the bandits scream, and then everything went silent. She looked up at him, tears still streaming from her eyes as she shook like a leaf. “Abelas!” she cried, clutching the tattered remains of her clothing to herself as she got to her feet. Without a second thought, she flung her arms around his neck, sobbing into his shoulder. “Thank you,” she whispered meekly. 

Abelas turned, surprised to have his arms full of the woman, his hands coming up to rest on her shoulders. He felt worse, he should not have harassed her as before, given her a hard time. “I am sorry. I should not have talked to you the way I did,” he said quietly, stepping back from her to pull the shirt he wore off before he handed it to her, “Wear this. It is cold.” He looked back over the bodies of the bandits. “And we should search them for anything that might aid us in our traveling.”

She took the shirt from him and stepped away, turning her back to him as she let her ruined dress drop to the ground and she quickly pulled the shirt on. It was long enough to cover her, but not nearly as long as she would have liked. She turned and looked over the bodies of her would-be rapists, and she shivered in disgust again. “Bastards,” she snarled and kicked one before she moved about their camp, looking over their supplies. “Wait! Where’s Jennifer?” she cried, spinning around to look frantically for the human, but she breathed a sigh of relief when she saw Jennifer cautiously approaching them. “It’s alright, milady,” she called out. “Abelas stopped them.”

Tears still dripped down Ellie’s face as she busied herself with going through the packs of the bandits. She found coin and food, skins of water. But it barely registered in her mind. All she could hear was the bandit’s voice in her ear.  Knife-ear.  She shuddered again, her stomach coiling as her neck throbbed where he’d sucked at her skin. “D-Damn it,” she gasped out and flung away the water skin in her hands as she sat heavily on her rear, pressing the heels of her hands into her eyes. She normally wasn’t prone to crying, but this shook her and she couldn’t help it.

Jennifer watched Ellie carefully, her lips pressing thin as she saw the bodies round the clearing. She went to Ellie immediately, hugging her closely to herself as she looked around. They had more than enough food now, plenty of water and clothes, but she could see the hesitation in her eyes.

A pitiful sound, somewhere between a squeak and a sob, escaped from Ellie as she leaned into the other woman. “I’m sorry, Lady Jennifer,” she gasped. “I shouldn’t have stormed off the way I did. That was so stupid of me. I just… I was so angry. I’m sorry.” Her face screwed up and she shivered in the cool wind. “Please forgive me.”

“Let’s drop the Lady,” Jennifer said, “Just call me Jen, or Jenny. We are equals honey.” She looked over to Abelas as he walked over to them, carrying several bags of supplies back to them. “Shhh, it’s alright. He was being a dick, and I wasn’t being much better than that. I’m sorry. I shouldn’t have said what I did,” she said, giving a look at Abelas as he paused next to her.

Ellie didn’t see a damn thing that she’d done right, but she was too upset to argue. She brushed her tears away and sniffled, calming herself. “D’you think we’ll be safe here for the night?” she asked to neither of them in particular. “At least there’s a tent. Ought to keep us warm enough.” She wondered if she could find better clothes, give Abelas his shirt back. She looked at him, her mouth going dry to see him standing there shirtless. She’d seen him like that many times over, why did it make her feel different now? She realized she was staring and looked quickly away.

Abelas sighed out as both Ellie and Jennifer joined him, hugging him tightly. It was odd to him, but the pain and numbness in his leg seemed to be pushed to the back of his mind. Protecting was what he had always been good at and despite what had happened to Elowyn, he felt like it recovered a small piece of him, gave him meaning again. “Their camp is well stocked, we may choose to rest here for a few days and see if Solas catches up to us. There are a few horses on the other side of the clearing here.” 

Ellie hadn’t meant to let Jennifer pull her into a hug with Abelas, but oh, she had to admit it was nice. She mentally shook herself. The only reason she felt this way was because of what had just happened and the fact that he was the one who had rescued her. She pulled back from them, her eyes finally dried, and she looked over in the direction he’d indicated. “I’ll bring the horses closer in case we need to make a quick get away,” she said. She gave Jennifer a sheepish look. “And then maybe you can fix us something to eat? I’ll look after Olivia while you do. I’d offer to do the cooking, but Abelas might think I’m trying to poison him,” she attempted to joke.

Jennifer laughed at that and she nodded. “I can do that,” she said, looking back at Abelas, “And we need to find you a shirt to wear. Go sit by the fire, your leg has to be killing you after that whole thing. I’ll see what kind of supplies they have and see if I can’t cook up something decent. My luck all they’ll have is ale and stale bread.”

Abelas gave her a look before he turned his head and hobbled over to the fire pit, his leg was doing better, but it was still nowhere near where he wanted it to be. He lamented the fact that he could not take the long, graceful strides that he had come used to over a thousand years of life. “After we eat, I will set wards along the perimeter of the camp. It should protect us if anything else tries to come for us.”

Ellie ducked into a tent, finding a small trunk filled with clothes, and she rifled through them until she found some that looked like they might fit. She was half-frozen in nothing but Abelas’ shirt. She pulled it over her head, noting how it smelled so good before she blushed and set it aside, pulling on the new clothes. “Quit being stupid,” she hissed at herself as she grabbed his shirt up and walked back outside to offer it back to him. “Here,” she said, her face still feeling a bit hot, then turned and stomped off to get the horses.

He blinked after her, an eyebrow raised at her behavior. Perhaps she was still upset with him, not that he had given her much reason to be otherwise. He let out a sigh and tugged on his shirt. He was so unused to having himself questioned, to being in a situation where he was doubted and argued with. It made him long for a simpler time back at the temple of Mythal. 

Ellie took her time retrieving the horses, trying to clear her head. She was still shaken and thought that she might be for some time to come. What she would’ve done if Abelas hadn’t come along, she didn’t know. The thought made her gag with repulsion and she gave herself a good shake. She didn’t know what to say to him, other than the thank you she’d already spoken.  _ ‘Doesn’t change anything,’  _ she thought to herself. It’s just because of what had happened, making her feel all screwed up on the inside. No, she’d just go back to irritating him, she decided as she walked closer to the camp and tied the horses up. A sigh escaped her as she sat next to the fire, managing a smirk at Abelas. “If you think that just because you saved me that it gets you off the hook for your exercises, you’re sadly mistaken,” she said, testing the waters with him so to speak, to see how he’d react.

Abelas let out a sigh. “Of course.” He pressed his lips thin as he looked into the fire, a small smirk tugging at the corner of lips. “I would have been worried for your state of mind if you didn’t feel up to being the thorn in my side once again.”

Ellie returned his smirk. "Always."


	4. Chapter 4

“Hmm. About time you woke up.” The woman looked over the man lying in her bed, giving a nod of approval. “Don’t try to get up,” she said and moved away from him, turning to stir the stew in the heavy iron pot that hung in the fireplace. “I thought for sure you were dead when I found you,” she said, tasting the stew and wrinkling her nose before she reached for a jar of herbs on the mantle, adding a measure to the pot. She stirred again and stepped back, brushing her hands together before she turned to look at him again. “You would have died if I hadn’t found you when I did. You’re lucky.”

She placed her hands on her hips, looking around her small cottage. Bunches of dried herbs hung from the rafters of the ceiling, suspended over the small table with two chairs that sat in the middle of the room. The wall next to the stone fireplace was covered with a mixture of iron skillets and copper pots, the dancing flames of the fire reflecting brightly off their polished surfaces. Crates of apples and potatoes were stacked in a corner, jars of every shape and size lined the shelves on the walls. Books and candles covered every spare surface. It was a bit cramped and cluttered, a bit eclectic, but not dirty, and somehow it all added to the coziness of the place.

“You’re safe here,” she said, pushing her black hair over her shoulder. It was thick and wavy, hanging down past her waist. She looked to be mid-thirties, though her grey eyes held a wisdom far beyond that age. She fixed the man in her bed with a piercing stare. “Now tell me how you ended up in that river,” she said as she moved to sit at the table and grabbed up a mortar and pestle to grind some herbs.

Pain. It was mostly the only thing he could feel and he groaned as he blinked up at the ceiling of the little cottage. He really, really hated water. And falling. He let out a small groan as he turned his head to look at the woman who sat down at the table. He licked his lips, trying to think back on how he had ended up in the river. Skyhold had been under attack and it was crumbling, he remembered falling and then letting go, Cassandra’s voice ringing in his ears.

Varric remembered the cold sting of the water as he plunged into it, the way the current had whisked him way. Sharp rocks had cut into him and the last thing he remembered was the large stone he smacked his head on. Shit, he needed to find Cassandra, was she even still alive? Did she make it out of the castle in time? “It’s a long story,” he said hoarsely, his throat feeling raw like the rest of him. He let his head sink back into the pillow, the scent of lavender wrapping around him, much like the blanket he was bundled in. He felt hot and sick, like the time he had come down with a terrible cold after trudging around in the Bone Pit with Hawke. He could feel bandages wrapped around his body. “Was there anyone else with me?” 

She gave her head a shake, not looking up from her work. “Just you,” she answered, slowly and methodically grinding the herbs. “A long story wouldn’t bother me. In case you haven’t noticed, there’s no one else here to steal my attention. I don’t get many visitors this far out,” she said. “But if you don’t feel like talking, I understand.” She finally got up after mixing the crushed herbs into a salve and went to sit on the edge of the bed. A frown pulled at her lips as she carefully pulled away the bandage around his head, revealing a gash at his hairline. “This’ll sting a bit,” she said as she worked the salve into the wound. “So what’s your name?”

He sucked in a breath of air as the herbal paste was smeared into the cut and it took him a moment to say something, focusing on the pain. It felt like he was a raw nerve. “Varric Tethras. I’m usually good at telling stories, but you’ll have to let me get some traction first. I’m surprised I’m not dead. I should be.” He swallowed harshly as she finally stopped fussing with the cut on his head. “Got a few questions too,” he murmured as he looked up at her, something about the way she moved, the way she looked at him was oddly familiar, yet he was certain that he hadn’t met this woman before, “Who are you and where are we, for starters. Then we can get to the part where you found me in the river.”

“Dorothy,” she answered, “Though most people just call me Dot. As for where we are, we’re in my home. Which is to say that you’re in the middle of nowhere.” She set aside the bowl and turned to adjust the bandage again before she went back to the fireplace. “It’s nearly a day’s ride from here to the river. You’ve been unconscious for most of it.” She grabbed up a wooden bowl and ladled the soup into it, then went to his bedside again. “Here, let me help you sit up,” she said, wrapping a surprisingly strong arm around his shoulders and moving the dwarf to sit against the headboard. “The few times you stirred, the only thing you would say was a woman’s name. Cassandra. Was she with you when you fell?” she asked, handing him the bowl.

Varric reached out, taking the bowl with shaking hands. He noticed he had bandages all over himself, wrapped up tightly around his forearms. “Thank you,” he said he looked down at the bowl, the fragrant steam rising up to bathe his face in warmth as he thought about Cassandra. “Yeah, she was trying to pull me back up after I fell, but if I had held onto her, it would… could have killed us both. I let go to save her life. I have to find her.” He felt the tears welling up in his eyes. “I have to let her know I’m not dead.” He shifted his legs under the covers of the bed, but they ached with a pain that told him he wouldn’t be going anywhere for a while.

“You have to heal up before you go looking for anyone,” she said, fixing him with a stern gaze. “You’re covered in bruises and cuts. I’m amazed you didn’t break anything in the fall. And you’re running a fever so high, I could fry an egg on your head.” She fixed a bowl of soup for herself, then sat in the chair to eat. “You think she’s out looking for you?” she asked, stirring the stew around with her spoon. “I’m sorry to say, but if she is, she won’t likely find you here. We’re too far away from the river. And there’s a snowstorm coming in tonight. Any tracks will be lost before she can get to you.” There was an apologetic look in her eyes as she glanced at him again. “I don’t like the thought of anyone out in that mess.”

“Shit,” Varric cursed as he looked towards one of the little windows in the cabin. “Knowing her? Yeah, she’s probably out in the middle of it all looking for me. She’s rather stubborn.” He hated the idea of Cassandra out in the middle of it all, most likely following the river looking for him or his body. “She’ll freeze to death before she gives up.” He looked towards the door of the cabin, knowing he should stay put, but the worry for her was not helping his fever addled brain. “I need to do something so she doesn’t drive herself to death looking for me.” 

Dot frowned. “And what would you suggest? Going out looking for her? Smoke signals? There’s nothing you can do, Varric,” she said, shaking her head at him again. “If you try to go out in that, you WILL die. Let’s hope your lady will have enough sense to keep herself alive for the time being. Is there anywhere she might go to meet up with you? Some place you could go once you’re healed, that is. A town, a landmark? There will be a way for you to find her, once you’re strong enough. But not before then.”

He pressed his lips thin, trying to think over where Cassandra might go to look for him if it was a last resort. “Shit, maybe the Crossroads.” He managed a laugh, “Or Kirkwall.” He sighed and let himself relax back into the bed, as much as he hated to admit it, the woman was right. He lifted a spoonful of the soup to his mouth and his eyes widened at the delicious flavors that burst across his tongue. It was delicious and familiar and he looked over at his host at her table. “You… have we met before?”

Her eyes narrowed just slightly and she stared hard at him for a long, uncomfortable moment. “I believe I would remember someone like you,” she answered before she finally tore her gaze away from him. She looked into the bowl, stirring it around with her spoon again. The way the surface of the broth rippled struck her with a sudden idea. “Would you-” She stopped, not looking up, and she gave a quiet laugh at herself. “Never mind.” She let her eye flick up to him, then back down again. “It was a crazy thought. Forget I said anything.”

He looked back over at her, his eyebrow raising as he swallowed down another bite. The hot liquid was soothing on his aching throat and seemed to make his fever seem not as bad as it really was. “Madam, I live on crazy thoughts. Not the best lifestyle choice, but it’s never stopped me before. How crazy are we talking about? I draw the line at dragons, red lyrium, and nugs,” he reasoned, if there was something that could be done for Cassandra, he wanted to do it. He wanted to know she was safe.

She tilted her head and pouted. “Aww, but nugs are so adorable,” she crooned. “And delicious, if cooked right.” She snickered as she finished off her bowl of stew and set it aside. In a flurry of movement, she grabbed up a larger stoneware bowl and filled it with water, then set it on the table. “This is an old trick,” she said as she worked, placing an unlit pillar candle on the table next to the bowl of water. “I can see things in the water. People, places. If you want, I can look for your Cassandra. It won’t stop her from searching for you, but it might make you feel better to know where she is.” Her storm-grey eyes pierced him again, and when she snapped her fingers, the candle on the table became alight with bright flame.

Varric’s eyes widened at the display. “Okay, so you’re a mage?” he asked, though this whole little cottage reminded him of something, but he couldn’t put his fingers on it. “An apostate mage living in the middle of nowhere. I think I know someone you would get along with swimmingly.” He looked at the bowl on the table and his energy left him at the thought of getting up to go over there. “You could just be telling me what I want to hear, not that it wouldn’t be unwelcome, but yeah. Let’s give it a try. I want to know if she’s still...” He trailed off, the words thick in his mouth. Maker help him if she had died after what he went through to save her. He wouldn’t put it past the guy above pulling the strings to be that cruel to him. Again.

“Not a mage exactly,” Dot replied smugly and sat down at her table. With a gesture of her hand, the flames in the fireplace dwindled to mere embers. Muttering an incantation under her breath, she stared at the now dark, mirror-like surface of the water, the candle’s flame dancing across it. The whole house was silent, save for the winter wind that began to howl outside the windows. Her brows furrowed for a moment, then her eyes widened and a slight smile crossed her lips. “This Cassandra of yours, is she tall? Short black hair, long scar on her left cheek? That’s the woman I’m seeing here.”

Varric’s eyes widened and he thought back, unable to recall mentioning what Cassandra looked like. A smile spread across his face, even though it hurt to do so. “That’s her! Is she alright? Maker tell me that she’s alive,” he breathed out, hardly daring to hope. He wanted to jump out of the bed and go over to see, but then, maybe he wouldn’t see anything at all. The thought hurt. He’d give anything to hold her in his arms after what they had been through. 

Dot nodded. “She’s alive. And she looks… irritated,” she said, voicing the expression on the Seeker’s face the gentlest way possible. She could see the woman trudging along the bank, large flakes of snow falling into her hair. “She’s searching for you, following the river. It looks like she’s calling your name.” Dot narrowed her eyes as the vision of Cassandra turned, speaking over her shoulder. “Someone is with her,” she said softly, straining to see the image more clearly. “A man, maybe in his early to mid-thirties? With short blonde hair. He’s leading a horse. And there’s a woman on the horse. She… has long red hair?” She looked up at him, and saw the surprise in his eyes. “You know these people too?”

Varric nodded. “Curly and Freckles.” He shook his head at the look the woman gave him. “Sorry. I do nicknames. Cullen and Lindsey, they came to find Cassandra and me after we didn’t come out of the Great Hall fast enough. Shit, if they hadn’t, Cassandra might be here with me for all I know.” He gave a groan as his head throbbed and he squeezed his eyes shut. “Just as well. Curly has a baby on the way, he doesn’t need to leave Freckle’s side any time soon,” he murmured, wishing the wave of nausea would go away. He became aware of another insistent need and then he realized, “Did you undress me?”

She blinked as the vision faded. “I did,” she answered. “I had to assess your wounds. And the clothing you had on was barely on at all. It’d nearly been ripped to shreds. Don’t worry, I kept my hands where they ought to be,” she said with a wink. She got up from the table and fetched him a simple black robe. “There’s an outhouse you can use. I imagine you might need it. You didn’t break anything, you should be able to walk. Just take it easy,” she said and handed him the robe.

He reached out and took the robe from her, it was softer than anything he had ever felt before and he raised an eyebrow at her. “This from the woman who told me I shouldn’t get up? I’m not sure I can stand on my own at this point, but I suppose it’s worth a try. How did you even get me all the way here if the cabin is a day’s ride away?” he murmured as he lifted the blankets off of him. Mostly everything was bandaged up so he didn’t care for his modesty as he swung his legs over the side. Everything ached.

Dot frowned as she saw the pain in his expression. “You’re hurting more than I thought you would be,” she said and crossed the house to him, helping him pull the robe on, and offered him her arm. “I have a horse,” she answered. “I went down to the river to catch some fish, to get out for a day or so. When I saw you, I managed to haul you up on the horse and brought you back here. No easy task, I must admit. You’re heavier than you look.” She made sure he had a good grip on her arm before she walked him towards the door, then bent down to help him step into his boots. “I also found that,” she said, nodding at the crossbow leaned against the wall. “Found it before I found you, actually. I assume it’s yours?”

Varric blinked at the weapon and he nodded. “Bianca,” he said automatically, though now the words reminded him of a time and a person that he just couldn’t have back. It almost made him feel like he was being unfaithful to Cassandra. He shook his head. This Bianca had a different personality than the real one. “Yeah, she’s mine. I’m surprised she wasn’t smashed in the falls. You have to be some kind of good luck lady for you to have found the both of us intact.”

A little smirk touched her lips as she pulled open the door and a blustery wind washed over them. “You wouldn’t be the first to say that,” she said, letting him take her arm again, and they slowly stepped out into the snow. “Don’t feel guilty. You named that crossbow before you ever met your Seeker. She doesn’t worry about it. Why should you?” she said without thinking, her eyes widening the next moment as she almost misstepped. Shit. She looked away from him and cleared her throat.

Varric felt the pause in her step, but he had no clue why. He had said she was lucky for her to find him, that was no reason to misstep. The wind should have been cold against his skin, but all it provided was relief, a true indication that he was more than a little ill. “Thanks for helping, Dot. I wouldn’t have survived out here if it weren’t for you.”

“I know,” she said, teasingly giving him a haughty look. She pulled open the door to the outhouse for him. “Go on. I’ll wait right here for you,” she said. “And when we get back inside, I’ll make you a tea that should help that fever and let you sleep. We’ll get you healed up before you know it.”

Varric chuckled at that. “If there was a tea that could let me sleep without the memories haunting me, I would pay you a fortune,” he muttered as he closed the door behind him. Embarrassment was behind him. He’d been in more compromising situations than he would care to admit and this wasn’t the worst one. He gripped the wooden sides of the outhouse as he lowered himself to the stinging cold seat as he relieved himself. Cassandra had better be okay, he thought, she had better not be trying to kill herself trying to find him. But he knew better. 

“Come on, then,” Dot said when the door opened again and she took his hand. “Let’s get you back inside before you freeze.” She pressed the back of her free hand against his cheek. “You’re still burning up. Let’s get you that tea. And if you want it to chase away bad memories, I can do that,” she said as she led him up the two steps into her cottage and shut the door behind them. “But it’ll cost you extra.”

He chuckled at that despite himself as he went into the cabin. The warmth was like a blanket around himself and he was sure he could go to sleep standing the way he was in the door frame. “You really remind me of these two girls I know,” he murmured as the comfort of the home seeped into him and he let the woman help him back over to the bed. “And where are you sleeping?” he asked, the fever slurring his speech a bit, “Guests should sleep on the couch.”

“Nonsense,” she replied as she covered him up in the bed. “I can make myself a bed on the floor. I’m in better shape than you right now. And probably younger.” She busied herself with brewing a tea, then sweetened it with a thick dollop of honey and brought it to him. “Drink that down. Should let you sleep through the night just fine. And in the morning, if you’re feeling up to it, you can tell me about these girls you know.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you to everyone who has been leaving comments on our stories! We love hearing from you guys. Makes us feel all warm and fuzzy inside. :)


	5. Chapter 5

Solas shivered and hugged his arms tighter around himself as he sat next to the campfire. His eyes burned and his body ached with exhaustion, but he could not sleep. It was perhaps the first time in his life that he had ever struggled with sleeping. Normally, it came swiftly and easily, only a matter of curling up and off to sleep he went. 

But not now. 

All he could think of was his love and his child, where they might be, how they were faring on their own out in this cold and unpredictable world. Though he knew that Jennifer was smart and strong, he could not help worrying over her. Especially since she was traveling with an infant and a man who could barely walk. And even though Ellie was a skilled mage, her talents were in healing, not fighting. No, he didn’t like their chances at all.

He scrubbed at his eye with the heel of his hand and sniffed, his nose running from the cold air that surrounded him. He was never going to get to sleep like this.

Bull shifted to lay flatter on his back. “Falling down dead from exhaustion won’t help you find her any faster,” he said without opening his eye. He curled his arm tighter around Dorian who was snuggled into his side. He’d let the mage lay between himself and the fire, just because he didn’t want to listen to Dorian whine about the cold anymore. 

“I know,” Solas huffed, somehow not surprised that the Qunari seemed to read his mind. Bull could almost be like Cole in that aspect, being able to read people so easily. “I cannot help myself.” He paused and swallowed harshly. “I am sick with worry,” he admitted quietly, looking down at the ground. “I cannot even find her in my dreams. Never before have I struggled to find her in the Fade. It is… discouraging.”

“Maybe the reason you’re having trouble finding her is that she’s having trouble sleeping too,” Krem murmured as he stared into the fire. Having finally woken up, he learned of the horrifying fate of the other Chargers. It left him with a bitter taste in his mouth as he thought about the family they had lost. “If sleep comes easily to anyone, I’ll worry about it.” He peered over at Dorian who was fast asleep at Bull’s side and he had to stop himself from rolling his eyes. “I never stopped worrying about him since he shacked up with you, Chief.”

“I know, Krem,” Bull answered. Once he and Dorian had become “official” it was as if Dorian were one of the family. Odd and ragtag as it was. They were still family. And telling Krem about the other Chargers had been one of the hardest things he’d ever had to do. It still made his heart ache to think about it. It was too fresh. He sighed heavily through his nose as he stared up at the sky. He was worried about everyone else, too. But he didn’t want to admit it aloud, to make the others worry even more. “They’re all fine. We’ll find them. Or they’ll find us.”

“I hope you are right, Iron Bull,” Solas said, though the Qunari’s words did little to comfort him. He rubbed at his face, a frustrated growl issuing through his teeth. It made him feel useless to not be there to protect Jennifer and Olivia. “I should have sent them across the bridge and not through the eluvian,” he scolded himself. “They could have gone with the others who escaped, we could have caught up to them by now. But Abelas, he was not fit for travelling. I thought I could get back to them, that it would be safer this way…”

“No use in beating yourself up about it. You made a choice and went with it. Who’s to say it would have turned out any better if you had sent them across the bridge with the others? We haven’t found any of them either,” Krem said as he glanced at the elf, “They’re a smart bunch, that lot. They’ll be alright until we get to them, you’ll see. Especially Jen. I don’t know if you’ve noticed, but she’s got a way about her, sees the world differently. She’s strong. I’d hate to be on the wrong end of her sword arm.”

“Sword arm,” Solas repeated breathlessly, a mirthless sort of laugh escaping him. The thought of her having to fight terrified him. He wrapped his arms tighter around himself to hide the way his hands shook. “She can defend herself, but I’d rather she not have to,” he murmured. He sighed and looked up at the sky again. “Forgive me. I am not much company tonight.”

“You’re not usually much company anyway,” Bull muttered, his eye closed now again, and he snickered as he felt Solas glare at him. “Ah, you know I’m just trying to lighten the mood. She’s fine. They’re all fine. We’ll find them.” He relaxed more, the warmth and weight of Dorian at his side lulling him to sleep. “Get some sleep, Solas. We’ll head out first thing in the morning,” he said, his voice low and sleepy.

Solas frowned at being told what to do and stubbornly sat there continuing to stare into the fire. His eyes felt heavy and his head was just starting to nod when he heard it: crashing footsteps, a low gurgling rumble, and the sound of great leathery wings unfurling. His eyes flew wide as he saw the dragon stalking right towards them. “Fenedhis!” he cursed and got to his feet, grabbing up his staff. “Wake up!”

Krem rolled to his feet with a groan, grabbing up his sword as he fell into a defensive stance. “Damn it, Chief! You can’t make bedtime wishes out here!” He narrowed his eyes at the dragon, the great beast looming above them, its yellow eyes glinting in the fire light. He heard Dorian curse as Bull shoved him up and he tightened the grip on his sword. “I thought you lot killed all the known dragons around these parts!”

“Vishante kaffas,” Dorian cursed as he was hauled to his feet, sleep quickly washed away as he stood, facing the danger. “Of course we can’t have one moment of peace, that would be too convenient!” He twirled his staff, summoning forth his magic. “Can we take it on with only the three of us?”

“The three of us?” Bull asked, a confused expression on his face as he tried to figure out who would be sitting out of the fight and for what reason. He felt the blood drain out of his face when he saw the other three men prepared to fight and he looked down at his broken arm in the sling. “Oh no. Oh  _ hell  _ no. If you think for one second that I’m sitting this one out, you can think again!” He grabbed his axe one-handed and, without giving any of them a chance to argue with him, ran forward with a roar to swing the weapon at the dragon.

Dorian grit his teeth. “You thick headed idiot! What do you think you are doing! You only have one arm! I swear if you die, I’ll resurrect you so I can kill you myself!” he shouted at the Qunari as he flung spell after spell at the dragon, working in tandem with Solas as they tried to keep the dragon confused and occupied.

Solas cursed under his breath as he carefully aimed spells at the dragon’s head, trying to keep it distracted from the Qunari hacking at its legs. He’d had about enough of dragons, after the events at Skyhold and now this? “If I never see another of these beasts again, it will be too soon!” he snarled, channeling his anger, his frustration, his guilt into every attack. 

Dorian watched as Krem jumped in with Bull, using his sword to hack away at a bloodied leg. “Watch out for the legs!” he cried as he watched the beast lift one and swipe at the young man. He cursed when he saw the Charger knocked back, landing a few feet away, out cold.

Bull roared when he saw Krem thrown on the ground, and he lunged for the dragon, driving the head of his axe deep into the side of its neck. A sick sort of satisfaction coursed through him as he yanked it back out and a spray of blood washed over him. “Bastard,” he snarled as the dragon screamed, thrashing about, its life draining away. He carefully avoided its legs, and smirked as he heard it gurgling, trying to spit fire at them, but could not. He shouldered his weapon and strolled casually over to Krem. “Can’t you stay conscious for five minutes?” he growled at his unconscious lieutenant.

Solas continued to fire spells at the dragon until he was certain it was dead. He gripped his staff tightly, leaning on it to keep himself upright. A new level of exhaustion washed over him as the first rays of daylight crept over the horizon. So much for getting any sleep. He managed a weak smile for Dorian, who still looked horrified that Bull had joined in the fight. “Perhaps it is good that most of us did not sleep,” he said, trying to catch his breath.

Krem groaned and lifted a hand to his head. “I think I’ve had all the fun I can getting knocked out. At least this time it wasn’t a bloody castle falling down on top of me,” He turned his head, looking to the dragon, “Though it might as well have been. Damnit, Chief. It’d be our luck you summoned one here just by wishing hard enough.” He pushed himself up, his spine cracking as he did so. “Ugh, it’s going to be a long day.” 

Dorian made a face as he looked Bull over. “Of all the stupid, ill considered acts you could have done, you attacked a dragon with only one arm,” he muttered. “There’ll be no living with him now,” he said as he looked to Solas, “You know this right?” 

Solas gave a nod, seeing the proud look on Bull’s face. “Single-handedly bringing down a dragon? And I mean that in the most literal way possible. He’ll be boasting about this for years,” he muttered. He gave a sigh as he slipped his staff over his shoulder and stood up straighter. “That was a foolish move. I’m not certain whether to scold him or praise him.”

Bull puffed his chest up a bit more and grinned at them all. “Ah, c’mon. That was one of the better fights yet,” he said and clapped Krem on the back, nearly knocking the smaller man over, and walked over to Dorian. “Don’t give me that look, Kadan. I knew what I was doing. Besides, I needed a good fight. Had a lot of crap I needed to get out of my system anyway.”

“Amatus, I worry for your sanity,” he said as he shook his head, “Beat yourself with a stick when you need to work on your feelings, fight a dragon to work out frustrations. Yes, okay, the dragon attacked us first. That is besides the point.” He held a hand to his head. “I need a drink. Why didn’t we save any of the bottles from the cellar?”

Bull just continued to grin. “We all have our ways. I beat the hell out of myself, you drink yourself into a stupor. You don’t see me judging you,” he said lightheartedly as he walked back to their campfire and began to gather up the few supplies they had with them. “Let’s get going. If anyone is around, I’m sure they heard all of that. We can eat on the road. Maybe even find a town and a tavern somewhere along the way. I wouldn’t say no to spending a night in a bed. And you can get that drink you want, Kadan.”

Dorian snorted and hauled himself up into the wagon, taking the reins for himself. “I think that’s the best idea you’ve had yet, Amatus.” He looked at the rest of them. “You all didn’t get any sleep did you? Stayed the entire night up worrying about everyone else. You’d had better get some rest while I navigate. Solas, you want me to just stay on the path? I hope you know where this eluvian is.”

Solas nodded. “For now, this is the quickest path,” he answered. “We will eventually have to venture off the road. But we will keep to it as long as possible.” He hauled himself into the back of the wagon and sat back heavily against the side with a groan. With any luck, perhaps he could doze a bit as Dorian drove. He settled into the wagon with a sigh and hugged his arms around his ribs, his thoughts returning to Jennifer and his daughter once again, hoping they were alright.

Krem looked to Solas, frowning a bit at the elf’s posture. “Don’t worry, you’ll see them again soon. Hold that babe in your arms again before much longer. Ellie’s a fierce woman with a heart of gold. And that elf, well, you’ve seen how he is. Been itching to protect and get back to something he knows like the back of his hand. They’ll be just fine, you’ll see.” He settled down next to Bull, leaning against the Qunari. “You should come over here, this big brute puts out enough heat he could set the damn forest on fire.”

Bull cocked an eyebrow at Krem. “You’re getting as bad as Dorian,” he lightly scolded. Not that he minded. “Yeah, c’mon Solas, don’t you want to cuddle?” he teased the elf, thoroughly enjoying the look of disgust that crossed Solas’ face. He threw his head back and laughed, loud and richly. “You’re too easy.”

“Hmph,” Solas huffed, looking pointedly away from the Qunari. If he was going to “cuddle” with anyone, it would be his vhenan and his daughter. And the thought just made the pain in his heart ache all the more. He wanted to scold himself for it, for falling so helplessly in love with both of them. But he couldn’t bring himself to do it. They were more important to him than anything else in the world now. He scowled at Bull. “I believe I am just fine as I am, thank you,” he said curtly.

Dorian chuckled. “Oh Solas, you know you want…” He trailed off, a chill racing up the back of his neck and he pulled the horse to a stop and looked around, his eyes narrowing. “Wait.” He paused and tilted his head, his lips pressing thin. “Do you all hear that?” he asked, hoping it was just his mind playing tricks on him. Icy cold fear dripped down his spine as he clutched at the reins a moment more before moving for his staff.

Bull sat up straighter, straining his ears to hear. A frown crossed his lips and his brow furrowed. “No,” he answered. Everything around them was deathly silent, no sound of birds, or animals, just… nothing. It sent a chill down his back and his good hand went to the axe on his back again. “Something’s not right,” he said in a low voice, looking around. 

Krem sat up straighter and reached for his sword as he saw the others reaching for their weapons. It was unnaturally quiet and he felt goosebumps crawling their way up his arms. “It feels like we’re being watched,” he muttered, his eyes darting upwards to the sky, but he saw nothing. “Shit, what is this place?”

Solas opened his mouth to respond, but was unable to answer. The words caught in his throat the instant he saw the stream of fire barreling towards them. “MOVE!” he commanded and flung himself over the edge of the wagon a split second before the fire hit it. He rolled several times until he came to a stop on his chest, shaking and breathless. But the dragon was dead! What in the… His thoughts stopped as he saw a second dragon, huge and furious bearing down on them, and the nest of eggs behind her.

“Shit!” Bull growled, bracing himself on the ground over Krem, staring up at the beast that was preparing to belch more fire at them. He glanced quickly over his shoulder; Dorian had managed to jump from the wagon before it caught flame. The wagon that was careening along the road, pulled by the terrified horse that was desperately trying to escape from the fire. 

His arm screamed in pain, he’d landed on it when he flipped himself out of the wagon. “Oh for fuck’s sake,” he grumbled as he got to his feet and grabbed his axe. He squared his shoulders, loosening himself up again. “I think we killed her mate,” he said to the others. “And she is pissed.”

Dorian growled, dropping into an attack stance. “Solas! You drove us right into a bloody dragon’s nest!” He summoned up an ice spell and flung it at the dragon. “We’ll be lucky if we aren’t roasted alive!” he shouted before he flung himself out of the way of a fireball. “Kaffas! Bull, your arm!” he called out, seeing the unnatural angle it was now bent at.

Solas wanted to shout back that it had in fact been Dorian driving, but there was no time for that. He got to his feet, aiming his own spells at the dragon. But she was having none of it. The enraged dragon rose into the air with a flap of her wings, then brought her entire weight down, shaking the very earth beneath their feet. Solas stumbled, his staff slipping from his hand, and he scrambled to grab for it. But movement out of the corner of his eye drew his attention. “Demons!” he called in warning to the others. No wonder the dragons were so agitated.

“Demons,” Bull growled, uncertain which he should attack first. “They just gotta shit up everything.” He finally settled on the dragon, deciding it was the more dangerous of the two threats. Damn if his arm didn’t feel like it was already on fire, but he used that pain and anger to fuel his lust for the fight. “Come on!” he bellowed and ran forward, just as he had with the previous dragon.

Krem gave a roar as he threw himself into battle, attacking the demons that tried to attack Bull. “I got your back, Chief! Bring that dragon down fast before she roasts us all alive!” he called out, spinning to slice an envy demon in half. Maker help him, he was familiar enough with demons to know them on sight what they were. “Solas! Behind you!”

Before Solas had a chance to react, before he could wrap his fingers around his staff, the demon was on his back. “ARGH!” he roared as it knocked him flat on his chest, its claws digging deep into the backs of his shoulders. Sudden thoughts that were not his own flooded his mind.

_ ‘Your beloved and your daughter will die, and it is all your fault. You abandoned them when they needed you most.’ _

Though Solas was usually able to ignore such whisperings from demons, this time it sank deep into his soul, clouding his judgement. Because those words were exactly the things he feared, the thoughts he’d had in his own mind. 

_ ‘We shall rip them, tear them to pieces and leave them for the dragons to roast alive. And as they die, their last thoughts will be how you failed them.’ _

He struggled to reach for his staff, his fingertips barely brushing it, and he roared again in frustration. He could hear the dragon, stomping and screaming in fury, could hear Bull and Dorian as they attacked it, but it all sounded very far away compared to the demon whispering in his mind.

_ ‘You will never see them again.’ _

“NO!” he shouted, trying to block out the words filling his mind. Without even realizing what he was doing, a feral snarl ripped from his throat as his body changed, and he raised up on four legs as the huge white wolf. 

It was with great satisfaction that he flung the demon from his back, then turned and sank his teeth into it, causing it to explode in a shower of black dust. With a snarl, he launched himself at the demons attacking Krem, then turned to face the dragon. The fur on his back stood straight up, his tail moving slowly as he growled at it, baring his fangs. He’d had enough of all of this.

Dorian’s eyes went wide and he stumbled backwards, falling onto his back as he kept his eyes on the giant wolf. “Vishante kaffas, I thought the Commander was pulling my leg when he told me about this.” He swallowed hard at the utter look of death that Solas was exuding at the beast, growling furiously at the dragon. He raised his staff, quickly killing off one more demon that decided to throw itself into the fray. “Amatus! Krem! Get out from under that thing now!”

Bull heard Dorian, but he ignored him. He was pissed off, in pain, and there was no stopping him now. He hacked at the dragon as the wolf attacked it, biting at its throat. Under any other circumstances, he was sure he would’ve fallen over backwards in shock like Dorian had. But he would not be distracted now. He was in the heat of battle and that was all he could focus on. 

The dragon roared and hissed as the fangs of the wolf sank into its neck. Stomping and thrashing, it tried to swipe at them, swinging its tail around in rage. And in its fury, it smashed most of the eggs it was trying to protect. The dragon’s scream rent the air as a spell hit its eyes, blinding it as the pests continued to attack.

Solas saw red as he relentlessly attacked the beast, biting and clawing at every inch he could get to. He didn’t enjoy killing the beast, but it had left him with little choice. He launched himself into the air as the dragon roared out again, and he sank his teeth deep into her neck, tasting the blood that poured forth from the wounds. His jaw locked, crushing the beast’s windpipe, and he held on as her struggle to fight back became less and less.

Dorian cursed under his breath as he launched spell after spell at the creature as he watched Solas very much tear out it’s throat as Bull and Krem had destroyed the front leg, causing the creature to stumble and crash forward. It roared, but not as vicious as before and thrashed a moment before it followed the wolf down to the ground as it drew its last breath. He panted, leaning over his knees as he watched it, making certain it didn’t get back up again. “Kaffas. There aren’t any more hiding about are there?” He peered around the area carefully before he shook his head. “At least Krem isn’t unconscious this time.”

Bull managed a laugh at that before he winced in pain. His arm throbbed with a sharp jolt of pain as he walked back over to Dorian and sat down heavily on the ground. “Shit,” he grumbled, looking at his arm. “Damn thing’s never gonna heal right now.” He shook his head in irritation, then looked over at Solas as the white wolf finally released the dragon from his bite. “Well that’s fuckin’ handy.”

Solas licked at his teeth, his white fur stained red as he cautiously walked closer to the three men he’d been traveling with. He didn’t know how they would react, what they would think, or if they would put it all together that he was more than a mere shapeshifter. He blinked, then reverted to his normal form, the dragon’s blood coating his chin, his neck, his clothing. His arms trembled as he crouched on the ground, true exhaustion threatening to overwhelm him now. “I had no choice,” he gasped out.

Dorian waved his hand in the air, looking over Solas’ shaking form. “No no, it’s not like shapeshifters are a big thing nowadays. Would have done my heart good for a little heads up, but no harm done. You have a little something, right here,” He gestured to his neck, “Ah, but it can wait, you look dead on your feet as is. I’m guessing that little trick takes a substantial amount of energy to perform. How does it work, exactly? It’s positively fascinating.”

“As long as the wolf thing is on our side,” Krem muttered as he sat down with them. “It’s got my vote. Handy little trick for taking down dragons. That demon got to you though, didn’t it? Damn fear demons know how to get into your head worst than this big lug,” he said, slapping Bull’s good knee, “Shit, but your arm is a right piece of work now, ain’t it Chief?”

“I’m fine, Krem,” Bull lied, a dangerous growl in his voice. “Don’t need you fussing over me.” He forced himself back to his feet, looking the direction the horse and wagon had fled. “Crap,” he growled low in his throat. “Looks like we’re walking.”

Solas got up as well, scrubbing at the blood on his chin and neck. “We shouldn’t be far from a town. If fate decides to be merciful, there may be a proper healer that can see to your arm,” he said. He didn’t know if he could walk that far at this point, but he really had no choice. “If luck were truly on our side, we would run into Ellie and the others. But I’ll not hold my breath for that. The universe seems to delight in our misfortune.”


	6. Chapter 6

Ellie tromped along, her feet sore from walking for days on end. But she refused to complain. Really, of the three of them, she had it the easiest. Both of her legs worked properly, and she didn’t have a baby to pack around. She’d tried to carry the cat, but it insisted on trotting along beside them, and she didn’t feel like getting scratched again by stuffing it into her pack. 

“I still think one of us should’ve gone into that town to get supplies,” she said as they walked. Caution had urged them to avoid the town and to stay off of the road. “I could have done it. If anyone had followed me back, Abelas could’ve taken them out.” She paused and batted her eyes at him. “My hero,” she crooned teasingly.

Abelas lifted an eyebrow at her, the teasing was different now. More tolerable, he figured, and he wondered if it was just the strange bond they seemed to have formed since he saved her from a terrible fate. Truth be told, he was in a better mood after having been able to do something useful since his leg had been damaged. “I’m not certain if that would work towards our current goal of anonymity.”  

Ellie shrugged. “I guess,” she said. Her nose wrinkled as a horrible smell wafted through the air. “Ugh! What is that?” she gasped, clapping a hand over her nose and mouth. “For the love of the Maker, Abelas, get downwind before you do that!” It was a good thing she had her hand over her mouth, because the look of fury he shot her made her want to scream with laughter. She hurried on ahead before he decided to attack her with that magic of his. She came to a stop when she saw the carcass of the dragon. “Ew.”

Jennifer shook her head as she shifted her hold on Olivia, giving Ellie a look. “You remind me of Sera, anyone ever tell you that?” she asked, unimpressed before she let her gaze drift over the dragon. “Shit. Look at this thing. Someone’s done a number on it,” she muttered as she walked around the corpse, “Bull’s gonna be upset; someone’s killing dragons without him.” She paused at the head, looking at the giant hole in the dragon’s neck and she narrowed her eyes. “This looks like a giant bite. Maybe it was fighting another dragon?”

Abelas stopped next to the dragon, his eyes scanning over the entire thing. “Unlikely. There are sword marks on the legs and belly. See this swipe here? Made by a large weapon, most likely a battleaxe. And here, these marks look like someone thrust a sword completely into the creature.” He looked around, “Fenedhis. This is a clutch. There are the remains of the nest over there.”

“Okay, so let’s get the hell away from it before more show up,” Ellie said, her hand still over her nose. “This thing’s been dead for a while. A few days at least, right? You’d think with it being so cold out that it wouldn’t smell that bad.” She looked over at the nest, her curiosity getting the better of her, and she ventured closer. “Aww, poor things,” she said, pouting a bit when she saw the smashed eggs and the now-dead babies that had been inside. Embers still crackled beneath the circle of dirt containing the eggs, and one was left untouched. Her eyes widened as the egg gave a little shake. “There’s still one over here that didn’t get smashed!” she called over her shoulder.

Jennifer shared a look with Abelas before they both went over to where Ellie was. Her eyes went wide in wonder at the little egg that was clinging to life in the little pile of embers. “Holy shit, is that thing hatching?” she asked as she looked it over. Her heart gave a little lurch as she saw it shake again and her motherly instincts hit her hard. “We should take care of the poor thing. It’s survived for a reason!” She nodded and reached out a hand, touching the egg carefully. “It’s so warm. I wonder if it needs a fire or anything to help it along.”

“Take care of it?” Ellie asked, exchanging a look with Abelas as if Jennifer had gone mad. “It’s a DRAGON. I mean, yeah it’s sad to see these little buggers dead like this. They’re cute when they’re little. But it’ll turn into one of THOSE,” she said, pointing over at the gigantic dragon corpse. “Dragons are untamable. People have tried. We should leave it, hon.”

“In this case, I must agree with Elowyn,” Abelas said, peering down at the egg, distrust in his eyes. “You have a babe to look after and soon, that little one will be big enough that it just might think that Olivia would make a good snack.”

The egg shook again, a scratching noise issuing from within, and a small crack splintered across its surface. A squeak and a gurgle could be heard and a tiny chip broke away. 

“Oh piss,” Ellie breathed and jumped back, nearly knocking Abelas over in the process. She grabbed him to keep him from falling, steadying him on his feet, then turned her attention to Jennifer, who looked absolutely fascinated by what she was seeing. “At least give me the baby if you’re going to play with that thing!” she insisted, holding her hands out for Olivia.

Jennifer chuckled and turned, handing Olivia to Ellie. The little baby was fast asleep and she had to roll her eyes at her daughter. “Dang girl could sleep through a hurricane,” she muttered, spying Abelas steadying Ellie on her feet as she jumped again from another squeak from the egg. “Poor little dear. Some big mean things hurt your parents, didn’t they?” she cooed at the egg as she crouched down next to it, “Come on then, push your way out. Crap, what do baby dragons eat?”

“You,” Ellie answered. “That thing is going to want to eat YOU.” She took another step back as the crack in the egg split wider still. A tiny claw worked its way through the shell, breaking off another chip. “Heh, make ya a deal, Abelas,” she laughed nervously as the chirping of the baby dragon grew more clear. “You knock her out and I’ll drag her unconscious body along with us. You know, just so we can get her away from this thing, yeah?” She cradled baby Olivia closer as the egg finally broke and out stumbled a baby dragon, roughly the size of a housecat.

Abelas blinked down at the little lizard that flopped, quite adorably, onto the ground and wiggled on its back for a few moments before righting itself and then looking around as it flicked its tongue out, tasting the air. He watched as it looked suspiciously at Jennifer’s outstretched hand before it chirped and headbutted her fingers. “The cat isn’t going to be happy with this development.” He looked down at the ground to see the cat sitting there, licking its paw as it bathed.

“The cat’s on his own. I’m not gettin’ scratched again,” Ellie said, wrinkling her nose slightly at it before she warily eyed the new dragon again. “We need to keep moving. We’re looking for Solas, remember?” she said, nudging Jennifer with her foot. Though she usually had a soft spot for anything small or helpless, she just couldn’t bring herself to feel that way about the dragon. “What’s he going to say when we show up with that thing?”

“Oh, I’ll just bat my eyes at him and he’ll let me keep it,” Jennifer said as the dragon scrambled into her arms and hid itself under her arm. She could feel the thing shivering and she hugged it to her carefully and she let her eyes travel to the sky, seeing the first licks of the sunset starting to stretch across the sky. “We should make camp soon. I’ll cook us up something good to eat. It’d be nice if we had some fresh meat. Like a bear or something.”

“Riiiiiight,” Ellie said, her eyes wide as she gave a slow nod. “Cause there’s so many of those just lying about here,” she said sarcastically. “Sorry, fresh out of bear. Pretty sure with that great lumbering thing over there, there isn’t going to be much prey around here at all. And it’s not like that thing is fresh enough to eat.” She wrinkled her nose as she looked over at the huge dead dragon. “Let’s make camp as far away from that thing as we can, yeah?” She wrapped her arms tighter around Olivia and turned to walk away, eager for a breath of clean air.

Jennifer nodded and stood up with the dragon in her arms. “Yeah, let’s get out of here.” She pressed her lips together. “You know, I feel like we should have run into Solas already. You don’t think he went somewhere else? Or did he…” She trailed off, closing her eyes shut as she thought about the possibility of Solas not surviving Skyhold’s attack. “No. He’s alive and trying to find some way to get to us. He just… went another way. There’s another eluvian. We will find it and we will find him.”

* * *

 

Ellie sighed as they finally found a place to camp that evening and she handed over a rather fussy Olivia to Jennifer. “I’ll get the fire started,” she offered and grabbed up some pieces of wood scattered about. It only took a moment to get the dry wood to catch, a small flame crackling there. Her eyes went wide as the baby dragon scurried over and tried to nestle down in the flames. “You silly thing! What are you doing?” she scolded, but the dragon ignored her and curled up in the flames, a tiny purr issuing from it. “Yeah, because this isn’t weird at all.”

Jennifer moved over, patting Olivia on her back as she peered at the little dragon that had curled up into the fire. “Guess he really was cold, poor thing. Listen to that purr. He’s just like a big kitty cat.” She laughed as she kissed the top of her daughter’s head and then looked around. “What supplies do we have? Abelas! You could go to that river over there and freeze a section of it. Maybe it’ll have fish!”

Abelas raised an eyebrow at her. “Or I could catch the fish without freezing them solid,” he murmured and looked over towards the river. “It may take me a moment. It is something I haven’t done in a long while,” he said as he stooped down to roll up his breeches before he turned and headed down towards the bank at the slow pace that had become his normal. He hated it and wondered when he would be at full strength once again. The numbness drove him insane.

Jennifer tilted her head at him and shrugged, moving to open up her blouse. “Well then, while he’s doing that, I’ll feed this one here,” she said as she settled down near the fire and winced slightly as Olivia latched on. “Easy, you little vampire,” she teased as she looked at the little drake in the fire, “Nice and toasty in there, huh?”

“Of all the stories I’ve heard, all the things I saw the Inquisition do, this is the weirdest,” Ellie said, sitting on her haunches as she fed more pieces of wood into the fire, watching it grow up around the little dragon. He just purred louder and nuzzled down into the flames. “So what are you gonna call it?” she asked, then blinked at herself. “Naming a dragon,” she muttered under her breath. She shot Jennifer an accusatory stare. “You’re sucking me into the crazy now!” she teasingly accused.

Jennifer chuckled and looked at the little one. It was insane how much it sounded like their cat and she looked at the little fuzz ball that curled up near the fire as well. “I’m not sure. Maybe I should do Solas a solid and let him name the little thing.” She laughed at the thought and smiled brightly at Ellie, “What do you think we should name him?”

“That thing isn’t mine,” Ellie said, shaking her head and standing up once she was satisfied with the fire. “Ask Abelas. Maybe he’s got some cool elven name for a dragon or something. Speaking of Abelas…” She trailed off and looked down towards the river. “He’s been down there for a minute. I’m gonna go see if he needs help. You yell for me if you need anything,” she said before she headed down to the riverbank, watching the sentinel. “Having fun?”

Abelas lifted his finger up slowly to his lips, as he stood in calf deep water. He pointed to the bank where he had thrown two large fish to the side when he had caught them and he dipped his hands back into the cold water as he kept his eyes on another fish that was trying to swim its way upstream. There was something methodical about fishing this way and it took him to a peaceful state of mind. He controlled his breathing carefully as he watched and waited, until he finally sprung forward, his hands grabbing up the fish and he brought it squirming out of the water and tossed it to the others where it flopped around in the grass. 

“Oh!” she cried in surprise when the fish was flung her direction, landing a few feet away. “Well, I’m impressed,” she admitted. The fish were large enough to more than feed all three of them. She crossed her arms over her chest. “But you’re not going to be impressed when you get sick. Get out of there before you freeze to death!” She gave a violent shiver at the mere thought of being in that icy water in this weather. “Come on, I got the fire started. It’s bad enough you’re still having trouble with your leg.  You don’t need frostbite and pneumonia on top of it all.”

Abelas snorted, but climbed out of the river. “Nor will you be pleased when I am your patient, so I imagine we both have something to work for. Elvhen have a higher resistance to illness and adverse weather conditions,” he said, rolling down his pants before he picked up the three fish and walked back towards the fire. “I must admit, I have never had someone be a mother hen to me, quite like the way you fuss.”

“It’s my job,” she said defensively as she followed him. “And speaking of which, it’s been a few days since you’ve done your exercises. We should work on that while Jennifer cooks.” An affectionate smile pulled at her lips as they returned to the fire; Olivia was asleep on the ground, all bundled up, warm and snug. “Eat and sleep. Sleep and eat. That must be the life,” she said and got down on her knees as Abelas handed the fish over to Jennifer. “Alright, get down here. You’ve got work to do,” she said to him, trying to fight the smirk on her lips.

Jennifer snickered as Abelas stopped himself from rolling his eyes and did as Ellie said. She smiled and pulled a fish to her, noting the way the dragon’s head perked up at the food and she laughed, “Now little one, do you want to eat the guts? Would you like them cooked or raw?” 

Abelas raised an eyebrow at Jennifer as she cut into the first fish, offering over the head for the little one, opting to set the thing in the fire where the dragon happily munched on its cooking treat. He sighed out and looked to Ellie as he positioned himself the way they would do back at Skyhold. “I suppose telling you that I’ve been walking all day would do me little good?”

“You would be correct,” she answered as she reached out to roll him to lay flat on his back instead of on his side like they usually did. “The muscles in your hip have had plenty of exercise. I want to get your knee moving again,” she said, grasping his heel in one hand and the back of his knee with the other. She carefully bent his leg, watching his expression to make sure he wasn’t in too much pain. The slight wince in his face told her it was more than a little uncomfortable. “Okay, now try to push me away,” she said, letting his foot rest against the front of her ribcage.

Abelas bit the inside of his cheek as he pressed back against her, his leg shaking from the effort of it. Perhaps walking with the hobble hadn’t helped him like he thought being mobile would. “I swear, if I ever see that witch again, I’ll make certain she knows my pain,” he grumbled. He pressed harder and turned his head away as he felt Ellie press back into him, “I’m certain that you are taking far too much enjoyment out of this.”

“No,” she answered softly, honestly. She was disappointed to feel that his leg was even weaker than she’d anticipated. She’d hoped that all the walking might have helped. “Push harder,” she told him, easing up a bit on the pressure she was putting on him. “And I don’t blame you one bit about wanting to get back at Morrigan. She deserves everything you give her and probably more.”

He smirked at that. “A healer prone to more violent tendencies? Have I told you your bedside manner leaves a little to be desired?” he teased before he grit his teeth and pushed back against her with a slight groan escaping his lips as he did so. It was not a comfortable position and pressing that hard made something in his leg hurt. Combining that with the numbness he felt, it was positively awful.

“I’m not the one committing the violence,” she countered. “I was just saying that if she was here, and you attacked her, I… might cheer you on. That’s all.” She liked this, it almost made the situation feel normal to work with him, snipping at each other the whole time. It was familiar, comfortable. She pulled back from him and set his leg down. “Okay, rest for just a minute and we’ll go again,” she said, shifting around to his side. Her fingers wrapped around his thigh, just above his knee, and she massaged the muscles there, trying to get more blood flowing, to see if she could loosen up the muscles a bit.

He was surprised at the way her fingers dug into his skin and he let out a groan of surprise and let his head fall back. This… wasn’t so bad. The fire was warm at his side, the scent of a good meal starting to fill the air, it was almost soothing. It reminded him of a better time, after he and his fellow sentinels would awaken to protect the temple. Afterwards, they would have a meal together and remember the fallen, those lost before they gave into uthenera once again.

“You’re doing that thing again,” Ellie said as she worked. “That thing where you’re somewhere else in your head. I know you miss it, but you could try being here and now a little more, you know.” She pressed her fingers deeper into the muscles, trying to work out the stiffness there. “Like the other day when you saved me. I could see it, in your eyes, how you were really here. You had a mission, a purpose in that moment. And I could see a fire in your eyes I haven’t seen before. You should try to be like that more often. Well, not all scary and pissed off like you were, but you know,  _ alive _ .”

“It is not easy, when everyone I knew. Friends, family are all dead. I still believe I should have died with them, a captain going down with his ship. It is taking me time to see that there might be yet another purpose, another duty for me to fulfill. Trying to relearn something when I’ve spent my whole life as someone? It is not easy. It felt good to protect you, Jennifer and the little one. It is my purpose in life, just as healing is yours.”

She paused in her work, for once the urge to antagonize him gone. “Then do that. Find someone worth protecting, something worth fighting for, and do it. Give yourself a purpose again,” she said, her voice soft but intense. She stared into his eyes for a long moment before she blinked, her face burning all the way up to the tips of her ears, and she focused on his leg again. “You know you’re not so bad when you’re not all grumpy. An’ shit.”

He snorted. “A rare feat for me to be nowadays,” he said, his lips curling upwards in a small smile. His attention was drawn to Jennifer who announced that their meal was ready and he nodded, letting Ellie help him upwards into a sitting position once more. His mouth watered at the sight of the crispy fish on sticks and he couldn’t stop his stomach from growling loudly. In his defense, it had been a while since they had eaten. 

“Mmmm,” Ellie moaned obscenely, letting her eyes roll dramatically back in her head. “This is so much better than any of that crap the bandits had laying around,” she gushed. She paused as she chewed, giving Jennifer an apologetic look. “I mean, it was good, you did with it what you could. But this… this is like my tongue is having an orgasm.” She bit into the fish again, her stomach rumbling as she ate like she couldn’t get enough. “So good.”

Jennifer chuckled and bowed her head. “Ah, thanks. It’s usually better than this, but then I usually have a thing of butter ready to coat them in,” she said as she ate her own piece, her eyes going back to the dragon who had surprisingly ate all of the fish heads she had given him. He was now purring away in the fire, curled up in a tight little ball. “I suppose we’d better keep the fire going for him all night.”

“I won’t complain about that,” Ellie said around a mouthful of food. “It’s gettin’ bloody cold out here at night. That tent doesn’t do much for keeping warm. So unless one of you wants to cuddle, which I DOUBT, then I’m all for keeping the fire going strong.” She tore off a piece of the fish with her fingers and offered it to the cat. “There. Peace offering. Don’t scratch me again,” she said sternly to it. She looked up at Jennifer again. “Besides, if anyone tries to bother us, we’ll just sick Abelas and the dragon on ‘em.”


	7. Chapter 7

The cold, damp air just seemed to seep into her bones as Cassandra tried to sleep. There was something unsettling about the place they’d chosen to camp for the night. Something felt wrong. Not to mention that the frozen ground was miserable to lay on and the pathetically small campfire did nothing to chase away the chill. 

Up and down the river they’d traveled for several days, with no sign of Varric anywhere. She didn’t want to believe that they were looking for a body at this point, though she knew that that was what Cullen and Lindsey now truly believed. The little supplies they’d had were now gone; none of them had eaten that day. And she knew Cullen’s patience with the situation was wearing thin. After struggling for so long to conceive, she knew that their unborn child was his priority. She didn’t blame him.

She stared across the firepit at them, Cullen curled protectively around Lindsey as they slept. A mixture of fear, anger, and jealousy shot through her. What if she never saw Varric again? She would never get to curl up like that with him, never get to kiss him goodnight, never read his stories or hear his voice or see his smile again. And the thought of that shattered her heart all over again. 

“Please,” she prayed quietly, curling in on herself, bowing her forehead to the frozen ground, “Let me find him. Holy Andraste, I will do anything if you help me find Varric alive. Please.” She choked up, screwing up her face against the tears that threatened to fall. Her fingertips scraped over the ground, digging into it as every muscle in her body seemed to tense with the desperate pleading in her soul. “Please. Let me find him. Let him be okay. I’ll do anything. Please, please, please. I just want him back.”

She didn’t know how long she laid there, crying and begging and praying. She just kept whispering, tears dripping down her face, praying for Varric to be alive until her body gave into exhaustion and she fell asleep.

When she awoke again, it took her a minute to realize where she was. Bright sunlight shone down on her, and a breeze swept over her, carrying with it the scent of the sea. Cassandra sat bolt upright, her eyes flying wide as she recognized the coastline. Was this the Fade? Had she stumbled upon Gramma all on her own in her dreams? She got to her feet and turned expectantly, hoping that perhaps somehow Varric had managed to dream again and that they could meet here. But her heart sank.

Instead of the beautiful white Victorian house, there stood the charred remains of what used to be Jennifer’s and Lindsey’s home. 

She turned on the spot, drinking in the details, trying to decide where exactly she was. Her eyes were drawn to the driveway, the SUV sitting there, the road, and the town that was just visible down the road. None of that was in the Fade when they’d visited before. “It cannot be,” she breathed in disbelief before she flung herself to her knees, shaking Cullen and Lindsey violently. “Wake up! I think we’re back in the other world!”

Cullen started awake and his eyes went wide as he looked around. “What in Andraste’s name…” He blinked at the sudden warmth that was around him; the cloak he wore almost too stifling for the weather and he froze when he saw the strange metal box sitting on a road of some sorts. It trailed to some strange black river that looked as solid as stone. “Where are we?” he gasped, looking to Cassandra who looked as though she knew this place, “This is their world?”

Lindsey blinked sleepily, squinting her eyes at the bright sunlight. “It can’t be time to get up yet,” she groaned as she pushed herself up. She froze as soon as she saw the old house. “Oh shit,” she gasped and got to her feet, her heart racing. “What happened? How the hell did we end up back here?!” She grabbed at her hair, a fear shooting through her. What if they couldn’t get back to Thedas? Without Dorian there to work the spell, what if they were trapped here? “Fuck! I don’t want to be here!”

“This does not make sense,” Cassandra murmured, looking around at the familiar setting. “There was no rift, and no one working any sort of magic to bring us to this place. I don’t understand it.” She frowned, still uncertain if she trusted it or not, but it all seemed so real. It lacked the warm comfort of the Fade that this place usually held. A frustrated growl issued through her teeth. “Well now what do we do?”

Cullen swallowed and stood up, running a hand through his hair and he looked all around them. “What can we do? Wait? We need to, I don’t know, do something? We didn’t do anything but sleep to get here. Could this still be the Fade? We have to be dreaming.” He looked around again and a voice in the back of his head told him that this was not the Fade he was used to seeing when he was asleep. This wasn’t a nightmare. He was still tired, hungry, and exhausted from traveling. “Do you think Varric is here somehow?”

“Maybe,” Cassandra answered. “But I don’t know where he would have gone.” She looked around, a small hope flaring in her chest at the thought. “Is this why we haven’t been able to find him? Did he somehow end up here when he fell?” The thought was encouraging, even if she didn’t know how they would get back to Thedas. At this point, she didn’t care as long as she found him alive and well. Her heart gave a skip. Had her prayers been answered? “We should look for him here. Let’s go into town.”

“Oh yes, I’m certain they’ve all missed me sooooo much,” Lindsey said sarcastically. Her stomach rumbled and with a roll of her eyes, she marched over to her SUV. “Surprised no one raided the thing,” she muttered as she retrieved her purse from the floorboard and slung it over her shoulder. “Come on. We can at least buy some food while we’re looking for Varric. He’s probably telling stories at the bar, having a gay ol’ time.”

Cullen’s stomach rumbled at the thought of food and he nodded. He remembered the tales of her hometown, how rude the people had been to her and her sister. How they had tried to kill them by burning them alive. “Don’t worry, my darling. If anyone tries to start anything with you, they will have to answer to me first,” he promised her as he let his hand slip around her waist and he hugged her tightly to him. “Food sounds like a good idea. I have to admit, I am a bit curious to see this world. Varric always talked of such strange things here.”

“Yeah, well, this isn’t the city we took them to, so don’t get to excited,” she said as they walked along the sidewalk into town. There was a sinking feeling in her stomach and she wanted nothing more than to turn and run from the place. It felt foreign to her now, like she was even more of an outsider than she had been before. Though she had to give a little giggle as a car drove by and Cullen gave a jump. “They won’t hit us. Well, as long as they don’t realize it’s me walking down the sidewalk, anyway,” she assured him. She frowned as they got into town. “What happened here?”

The town barely looked like the place she remembered. Many stores were darkened inside, some with their windows boarded up. There was litter in the streets, like no one cared to clean up the sidewalks anymore. And there was a feeling of despair in the air. 

“Looks like the grocery store is still open at least,” Lindsey said, tugging Cullen along with her as she headed towards the store. She really didn’t want to go in there, but she was starving and she knew Cullen and Cassandra had to be as well. She ducked her head a bit, her hair hanging down over her face, hoping that not many people would recognize her. “Let’s just grab a bunch and get out,” she said as she grabbed a cart to push along the aisles. “Get whatever you want. It’s not like I’m gonna pay off this credit card anyway. Fuck ‘em.”

In retrospect, it was probably childish, but Cassandra’s first thought was of chocolate and popcorn. She remembered sharing it with Varric as they watched movies, cuddled up on the couch, when they first started their relationship. For the first time in days, a tiny smile pulled at her lips. It would be fun to share that with him when they found him. “This way,” she said, remembering where she and Jennifer had found it in the store before. “And stand up straight. Do not give these people the satisfaction of knowing they intimidate you. You have me and Cullen with you. They will not touch you this time.”

“I think I’d rather face Erimond again instead,” Lindsey muttered, but followed Cassandra anyway.

Cullen was amazed at all the food that was in the one building. Boxes and cans lined up so neatly. “How are we going to carry it all?” he wondered and looked to a stand that was set up in the middle of the floor with lights and heat coming off of it as well as the most delicious smell he could have imagined and it made his stomach growl. There were whole chickens, roasted and ready to go. And there were other boxes full of chicken pieces or, at least what he hoped were chicken pieces. He had never seen them breaded quite so strangely. “Maker, this smells amazing.”

Lindsey managed a smile for him. “Get some. It’s pretty good,” she said. “Grab a few, actually. I’m starving. We’ll get some sides from the deli back there.” She nodded towards the back of the store. She let him place the containers in the basket before they continued on, but paused when she saw Cassandra staring at the boxes of popcorn on the shelves. “You know, those ones in the metal pans there, the ones that say Jiffy Pop? You can pop those over a fire. Grab some of those and we’ll take them with us. You know, for when we find Varric.” It almost felt like a lie, she still wasn’t convinced he was alive, but it broke her heart to see Cass like this.

Cassandra smiled and gave a sharp nod, then grabbed up a small stack of the popcorn containers. “And chocolate,” she said. “We have to get chocolate.” She was eager to get out and search here for Varric, but she knew they all needed to eat before they fell over. She followed Lindsey back to the deli counter, where the redhead ordered several sides to go with their chicken. But she didn’t like the look the worker gave them.

“When did you get back in town?” the young man behind the counter asked as he packaged up the food. His eyes narrowed slightly, and his movements were jerky as if he were angry or afraid. 

“Just now,” Lindsey answered. “Don’t get the whole damn town in a tizzy. I don’t plan on staying long.” She took the food from him and placed it in the basket.

“Shouldn’t be here at all,” the kid muttered. “We don’t need you cursing anyone or killing any more people around here.”

Cullen narrowed his eyes as he stepped up next to Lindsey, his eyes trained on the young man, though he didn’t think he gave off a very threatening presence with his arms full of several things of chicken. “Do not speak ill of her, she and her sister have done no such things to this place. And it was you all who tried to burn her and my friends alive. If there is anyone who shouldn’t be here, it’s you.”

The young man’s face turned red at being scolded. “If it wasn’t for them and all that devil-worship shit they did, my friend wouldn’t have gone crazy,” he spat, though he stumbled slightly over his words. “I’d be careful if I were you. They’ll be casting spells on you next if they haven’t already.”

“Forget it,” Lindsey said to Cullen, tugging at his arm to pull him away from the counter. She was beyond embarrassed and wanted nothing more than to get away from there. “Nothing you say will change their minds. This whole town’s gone to shit since we left and they don’t even make the connection. It’s not worth it.” She led the way down another aisle, grabbing up packages of ramen noodles and beef jerky, things they could carry with them easily if they found a way back to Thedas. “Let’s get out of here and get eat.”

They stopped by the freezer at Cassandra’s insistence and each picked out a pint of ice cream, then headed for the checkout. Cassandra ruffled at the look the cashier gave them and spoke before the employee could. “Keep your thoughts to yourself. We won’t be here long,” she said sternly and nearly smirked as the girl cringed and quickly rang them up. She grabbed up some of the bags and strolled out of the store as soon as the receipt was handed over. “There are some things I miss about your world, but the people here are not it.”

They made the short walk back to the yard of the old burned down house and Lindsey sat down with her back to it. “I can’t stand to look at it,” she muttered as she grabbed one of the containers of chicken out of a bag and popped it open. “Fucking starving,” she muttered and tore off a piece, and ravenously sank her teeth into it. 

Cullen chuckled at her, seeing the puppy wagging its tail happily at them and he picked up a big piece of chicken and tore off a large chunk before he offered it to the little thing. “There you go you little scamp. You’re hungry too, aren’t you? You don’t even care that we’re here as long as you get fed, huh?” He smiled at the dog as he followed Lindsey’s example and bit into the food. It was hot and so good, he groaned and all fell quiet as they ate.

Cassandra couldn’t remember food tasting this good, but then again, it had been a few days since they’d had a decent meal. She supposed anything would taste good at this point. A sudden blast of cold air hit her and for just a moment, it was as if they were back in Thedas. There was a flash of the river, the trees they’d camped under, and then it stopped and they were still sitting in the front yard of the old house. “What was that?” she cried, nearly choking on her food. 

Lindsey blinked and looked around. “That was weird,” she said, chewing slowly, watching as if she expected to see it happen again. “That… that was Thedas, wasn’t it?” She waited for a moment, but it didn’t happen again. “There’s a glitch in the matrix!” She pressed her lips thin at the looks Cullen and Cassandra gave her. “Sorry,” she murmured, “Wrong fandom.”

Cullen looked at her, not certain what she was talking about and he looked around them again as he swallowed down the current mouthful. “I wonder if it’s anything like the Veil. The barrier between the worlds I mean. I feel like Solas or Dorian would be able to offer more insight to the matter.” He looked around carefully, “My question is that if we were able to slip through it without barely a thought, what else has come wandering around? Nugs? Fennecs?” He looked to Cassandra, worry in his eyes, “Demons?”

“It is possible,” she answered. “It was by accident that we came here in the first place. But there was a rift, and a piece of the red lyrium got pulled into it. This? This I cannot explain. Unless…” She trailed off, a thought hitting her then. “The red lyrium. We never found the piece that went through the rift. If it is here, what does that mean for this world? It has been over a year since we were last here. It could have spread or grown or whatever it is that it does.” She ran a hand down her face. “I wonder if that is playing some part in all this.”

Cullen pressed his lips thin and nodded, looking around. “Let’s finish eating, then we can look for this red lyrium and destroy it. Hopefully find Varric while we are here.” Though he was immensely doubtful that the dwarf was still alive. Apparently they were all having some trouble of finding their way to Lindsey’s grandmother’s place in the Fade while they slept to even ask her if she had seen what happened. The whole situation left a bad taste in his mouth. 

“All this shit is making my brain hurt,” Lindsey complained and grabbed her pint of ice cream, popping the top off of it. She frowned the next moment. “I don’t have a spoon.” A pout crossed her lips as she stared at the treat in her hands. “Fuck it,” she shrugged and lifted the container to lick at the top of the ice cream. “Don’t judge me,” she growled.

Cassandra couldn’t help but to laugh. “You are a mess,” she said before she returned to her own food. It felt weird, to laugh again, to sit here and have a picnic when they’d been so lost looking for Varric for so long. Her smile faded as she thought about him. This was wrong. “If Varric was here, he would stay near the house, wouldn’t he?” she asked as she reached for her own container of ice cream. Maybe the sweet would ease the pain she felt, if only a little. She shook her head. “Perhaps he isn’t here in this world.”

Cullen reached across to give Cassandra’s shoulder a firm squeeze. “He’d probably be running the town and trying to fix it up if he were here. But maybe he came to the same conclusion we did. Maybe he went for the red lyrium.” He knew he shouldn’t be giving her false hope, but perhaps some part of him was secretly wishing, hoping beyond hope that somehow Varric was alive. He wouldn’t take that from Cassandra until they had found a body. “My priority right now is keeping you two ladies safe and well taken care of until we find him.”

“When did you become romantic?” Cassandra asked, leaning slightly away from him as her nose wrinkled. She used her finger to scoop some ice cream out of the tub, then sucked on it. “The lyrium should be here in this yard,” she said. “This is where the rift brought us through the first time, and then now a second time we have landed in the exact same spot? The likelihood of that is slim. I think the lyrium must be close by that particular spot.”

Lindsey fished in the plastic shopping bags, then held out a container of ice cream for Cullen. “Eat that before it melts and then we’ll start looking for Varric and the red lyrium. Surely we can find one or the other,” she said.

Cullen took the container from her, his eyebrow raising up as he read the name of it. “Death by Chocolate? Are you certain this is safe to eat?” he asked as he pried off the lid and was surprised to see a rich, deep brown color inside. He scooped some up with a finger and tasted it, unable to stop the moan of pleasure that escaped him and he eagerly scooped up more. “I’m starting to see the benefits of this world. Does everyone  always eat food this good?”

“Yup,” Lindsey said as she scooped the last of her ice cream out of the container with her fingers, then licked them clean. “More often than we should. And this is why most Americans are fat.” She grabbed up a bottle of soda she’s picked up at the store and took a swig. “Oh sweet baby Jeezus, I forgot how good this stuff is. I’m gonna be so sick later. And I will regret absolutely  nothing.” 

He chuckled at her and nodded. “This is really good. Too bad we can’t take more of it with us back to Thedas. Could just stick some of this into the snow to keep it cold,” he said and sighed as he finished off his carton and moved to lay back in the warm grass. His puppy bounded over to him and struggled to climb up onto his chest where it curled up into a ball and gave a huff. Cullen chuckled and scratched at the dog’s ears. “You are spoiled rotten. Your mommy spoils you, doesn’t she?”

“Ugh.” Cassandra rolled her eyes as she got to her feet, brushing her pants off. She narrowed her eyes slightly as she looked around, trying to decide which direction to start searching first. 

Just as she moved to take a step, it happened again. Everything around them seemed to warp, as if looking through rippling water, and suddenly they were all back in Thedas, next to the riverbank where they’d camped the night before.

Cullen sat up straight, the ground cold again and the wind was harsh. “Maker’s breath! Can’t it make up it’s mind?” He cursed under his breath and pushed himself up, his puppy in his arms as he looked around. He sighed in relief as he saw Lindsey still at his side. “This is getting weird. Perhaps we should move out of the area? We might get stuck on the other side next time and then where will we be?”

Lindsey eagerly nodded her agreement. “Let’s get the hell away from here. We’re gonna get sick going back and forth between the hot and cold weather,” she said, grabbing up the bags of food they’d purchased. “I guess that was sort of handy though, huh?”

“Incredibly convenient,” Cassandra answered as she turned her attention to the river. The first rays of sunlight were creeping over the horizon, glistening off the cold water. “What is that?” she breathed as a flash of red caught her eye. She ran for the river, splashing into it to grab up the scrap of red cloth that clung to a downed tree. She recognized it instantly, the gold embroidery on the edge. “It’s part of Varric’s tunic!”

Cullen’s eyes went wide and his heart clenched at the implications. His eyes scanned down the bank for any sign of the dwarf as he hurried over to Cassandra. His hopes sank when he laid eyes on the tattered piece of cloth in the Seeker’s hands. “Andraste, please,” he murmured quietly as he pressed his lips together. He could only see the hope in Cassandra’s eyes as she eagerly followed his gaze. “It’s so tattered. If the river shredded this so badly, I can only imagine what it might have done to him.”

“No,” Cassandra said firmly as she shook her head. “He’s just hurt. He is still here in Thedas somewhere and I am going to find him.” She clung to the scrap of Varric’s shirt as she tromped farther down the riverbank, her eyes searching desperately for some other sign of him. Finding that piece of Varric, however small it may have been, only steeled her resolve to find him all the more. He was here. And she wasn’t going to stop until she found him.


	8. Chapter 8

Dot laughed, leaning back in her chair at the table as she listened to one of Varric’s stories. “Oh, I am going to miss you when you leave,” she chuckled, wiping a tear of laughter from her eye. She was still laughing as she got up from the table and went to her little counter, returning to the table with a plate of sticky buns. “You’re healed up enough. I imagine you can leave any time you want now.”

Varric smiled at her as she firmly placed two of the sticky buns on a plate in front of him. “Dot, I have to. It’s a matter of self preservation at this point. I’m beginning to think you are fattening me up for the kill,” he teased with her, but he frowned the next moment as he thought about getting out of there. He had a nervous energy in him and he knew he had to get out there, he had to find Cassandra. He had to let her know that he wasn’t dead. “Hopefully with that little scrying trick you did, I should be able to find her.” Despite his injuries and sickness, he had enjoyed the week with the woman. She had been ready for him at night when he woke up, sweating like a pig because his fever finally broke. Always had something hot to eat that was a comfort and always had a kind word or something to say that would ease his mind. “You could always come with me, who else is going to cook for me?”

“Oh, don’t you worry about that,” she said. “I’ve already got something set aside for you. You won’t go hungry when you leave here.” She gave him an apologetic smile. “I can’t go with you, dear. I have things to do, other people who need me.” She didn’t elaborate and she helped herself to one of the buns. “And if I wanted to fatten you up for the kill, I wouldn’t have told you that you’re ready to leave,” she said, quirking an eyebrow at him. “I imagine that Seeker of yours will be happy to see you when you find her. You’ll have quite the story to tell when you two find each other!”

He pondered at that, wondering what other people there were who needed her help. Throughout the entire week, it had just been the two of them. No visitors, no nothing really, but then, there was just something about her that was mysterious. Not dangerous. He had never felt safer before in his life. 

He smiled at her as he bit into the sticky sweet bun, savoring the warmth of it and how it made him feel grounded. “I think I’m ready to not have an exciting story with me as the main character. I’m better off as the loveable sidekick. Better for my health that way,” he said. “Still, I would be lying if I said I wasn’t itching to get out there to find her. My luck, she’s probably going to stab me before she’s happy to see me. Stab me for letting go of her hand in the first place.”

“Mmm,” Dot hummed thoughtfully. “I think she’ll be so happy to see you, stabbing will be the last thing on her mind. Just be wary after her initial excitement wears off. Then she might be tempted to. You’ve told me enough about her, I wouldn’t doubt it.” She looked out the window at the setting sun. “At least the sky is clear. You won’t have to try to travel through another snow storm. Oh! I almost forgot.” She got up quickly and went to a drawer, retrieving a small object. “I found this with you as well. There’s a very… interesting energy about it. Whoever made this for you knew what she was doing. She must’ve been very well trained.” There was a tone of pride in her voice as she handed the necklace over to him. “It may have been what saved your life.”

Varric’s eyes widened as he reached out and took the amulet from her fingers. It was a comforting warmth with a solid weight and it brought tears to his eyes as he stared at it. “It’s a protection amulet. A very dear friend made this for me.” He swallowed the lump in his throat and lifted his other hand to his eyes, wiping away the tears there. “Shit. She saved my ass again.” He let his fingers curl around the stone and he looked back up at Dot, “Thanks for this. She would have kicked my ass too, if I lost it.”

She sat back in her chair with a smirk. “Do you make it a habit of pissing off women?” she asked in an amused tone. “That’s not a very healthy way to live, you know,” she teased. She was happy that she’d been able to help him, that she’d managed to get to him when he needed help. And she was glad to be able to spend the time getting to know him this well. “So do you have a plan? Which way do you intend to go to find your Cassandra?”

“Well, if I know Cassandra, she’s probably been stubbornly following the river. I think I’ll start by heading back up that way. Don’t suppose you have something to help two people find each other?” He chuckled, “Sorry, I think I’ve started associating you with my two friends, the sisters. Maybe when I meet back up with everyone and get this whole mess sorted out, I’ll bring them by and you all can meet.”

She gave him a coy smile. “I would like that,” she said. “After everything you’ve told me about them, I think I would enjoy their company.” She finished off her bun and licked her fingers clean. “We should get some rest, Varric. You’ve got a long walk ahead of you in the morning. It would be best to get an early start.” She got up and grabbed up a pack, then set it next to the bed. “There should be enough in there to keep you going for a while. I hope it’s not too heavy. I packed it as full as I could!” she laughed.

He grinned and nodded. “Ah, the exercise will do me some good to work off all those good meals you cooked for me,” he said as he went back to the bed. “And thanks for the clothes. I would be a sad dwarf if I had to be running around Thedas in nothing but my smallclothes. No one would be impressed then,” he said with a chuckle. He smiled at her as he pulled the thick blankets up over him. “Thanks for everything, Dot. I won’t forget it. I take care of my friends.”

“Oh I know,” she answered as she settled onto the bed she’d made for herself on the floor. Several times he’d offered to trade her, but she insisted that he take her bed. He was the guest in her house afterall. “And don’t forget, I’ve seen you naked. EVERYONE would be impressed if you went running about in your smallclothes,” she teased, giving him a wink. “But then you’d be in real trouble. You’d have to beat the women away with a stick.”

Varric burst out laughing at that and he shook his head at her. “You are incorrigible. I love it. How come a lovely woman such as yourself isn’t beating away men with a stick by the shipload? I hate to think that you’re all alone out here,” he said, giving her a sad smile. “Ah, but you said you have other people to take care of, so you can’t be completely alone. You hiding them around here somewhere?”

“Yes. Under the house,” she answered, trying to hide the way she snickered, but then sobered. “There’s someone else I’ve been looking after, too. He’s alright for now, but I do need to get back to him. I imagine he’s been rather bored on his own.” She sighed as she settled down more into her makeshift bed, a yawn splitting her face. “I have to get back soon. I may already be gone by the time you wake up in the morning. Just so you know. So don’t panic if you wake up and can’t find me. I’ll be alright.”

“That eager to be rid of me? I’m hurt,” he teased as he looked down at her on the floor. “Well, if you’re going to be gone by the time I wake up, I might as well say my goodbyes now. Or you know, see you laters. Because I will come back,” he said as he nodded, “But really, thanks for everything. I wouldn’t have made it on my own if you hadn’t found me when you did. I owe you my life.”

“You don’t owe me a thing, darlin’,” she yawned. “And no, I’m not eager to get rid of you. I’m going to miss you. Quite a bit, actually. If it wasn’t so urgent for you to find your Seeker, I’d ask you to stay longer.” She gave him a soft smile. “And we’ll see each other again. I’m certain of it. Now go to sleep. Try to dream of that Seeker of yours, if you can.”

“For her, I’ll dream.”

* * *

 

Varric woke the next morning with a shiver, the fire must have gone out some time during the night and he gave a groan as he turned over in bed, only to find himself with a facefull of dirt and he sat up, spitting out the grit. “Dot, what the…” He trailed off as he opened his eyes, freezing. It was still the cottage, but yet... it wasn’t. It was in shambles, no furniture, and old. Like no one had been there in ages. He could see snow in the hearth, and gone were all of the candles and dried herbs. The only things that had remained was the pack Dot had made for him, Bianca, and the clothes on his back. There was a cloak draped over the pack and he reached for it, feeling the warm material with his fingers before he pulled it to himself. 

What had once been his bed was nothing more than a thin blanket on the ground. “Okay, this officially passes mysterious into something weird and creepy,” he said aloud as he pulled the cloak on over his shoulders, drinking in the entirety of the little cabin. It didn’t make any sense. It was as if no one had been in this place in years. A thick layer of dust coated every surface; there was no sign that Dot had even been there at all.

He fixed Bianca to his back and swing the pack of food onto a shoulder before he shook his head and stepped out of the door that was barely on its hinges. He looked out over the snowy woods in front of him. The river was a day away and then he could start looking for Cassandra as he made his way back up towards Skyhold.  

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry, short chapter today. But we hope everyone had a Happy Thanksgiving!
> 
> Time for a food coma now. Zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz.


	9. Chapter 9

Ellie awoke to a coughing fit, her throat burning and her chest constricted as she struggled to breathe. There was a pressure behind her eyes and across the bridge of her nose. “Ugh,” she groaned as she sat up, her eyes streaming and nose dripping. “Noooo,” she whined softly, not wanting to wake the others in the tent. She shivered from head to toe as she crawled out of the tent, heading for the warm glow of the fire outside. She paused when the dragon cracked its eye open at her, curled up in the fire that burned. “I think you have the right idea,” she muttered to the little creature as she sat herself down as close to the fire as she dared. She sniffled again, wrapping her blanket more securely around herself, and fell to coughing again. “Oh this is going to make traveling fun.”

Abelas woke the moment Ellie left the tent. Normally he was a heavy sleeper, but something told him to wake up. It wasn’t uncommon for one of them to get up and leave the tent for personal reasons, but this was different. His ears hardly had to strain to tell the difference in the healer’s tone of voice, the slight rasp as she breathed and obvious coughing. 

The healer was ill. 

He couldn’t help but think of the irony, the way she would get on him when he would go out into the river to catch them something to eat, yet she was the one who ended up with the cold. He sat up, scratching at his scalp for a moment as his eyes flickered over to Jennifer and Olivia, still sound asleep. Like mother like daughter, he supposed. He moved silently and picked up the fur he had been using and slipped outside of the tent as well. The little dragonling had its head sticking out of the fire as it sniffed at Elowyn, clearly knowing that something was off about the elf as well. He walked over and draped the fur around her shoulders. “What was it you told me? You’ll catch your death of cold?”

She shivered and let him wrap the pelt around her. It was still warm from his body heat and she pulled it tightly around her. “Did… Did I,” she struggled as she began to cough again, unable to finish her sentence. It took her a moment to calm her breathing before she could speak again. “Dammit,” she cursed. “Did I wake you? I didn’t mean to.” When he offered her a drink from his water skin, she gave him a sheepish look. “I’m supposed to be the one taking care of you,” she muttered, but accepted the water skin and sipped at it. The cool water seemed to ease her throat a bit and she bowed her head, trying to breathe steadily. “I’m half tempted to crawl in that fire with Jennifer’s dragon.”

“I imagine that would be greatly ill advised,” he murmured as he moved to sit down next to her, watching as the dragon laid its head back down on the ground with a huff. “I do not suppose that you have any medical herbs to treat your illness? Regardless, it would be unwise for us to travel with you in your current condition. The cold weather and strain on your body would undoubtedly make it worse,” he said as he thought about it, a little worry bouncing around in his chest for the healer. She did not sound good. 

“No. When I grabbed supplies from the infirmary before we ran out of Skyhold, I was thinking about treating injuries. Not head colds. And we can’t just sit here. We have to keep looking for Solas,” she answered. “And I can’t stay in that tent. I could make the baby sick if I’m contagious. Jennifer would never forgive me.” She paused and after a moment added, “I would never forgive myself.” She rubbed at her eyes, trying to relieve the itch and the pressure there, and she sniffled again. Her own voice even sounded a little thick to her. “You could always just put me out of my misery,” she said with a slight laugh. “You know you want to.”

“Only a little, but I have put far too much effort into keeping you alive to let it go all to waste now,” he said as he gave her a small smile. “I will see what I can do about setting up a tent just for yourself. I know a few things about what herbs to use to treat such an illness, but perhaps Jennifer might have some of that weird magic of her own that might augment the tea I will make you,” he said as he spared at look at her, “And I may be crippled, but you are in no position to argue with me on the traveling.”

Ellie wasn’t sure what to think. Aside from saving her from her attackers, Abelas had never offered to do something nice for her. She wasn’t used to  anyone  doting on her, taking care of her. It was usually her doing everything for everyone else. “This is weird,” she muttered softly. “I’m used to being the one bossing you around. I don’t think I like this.” She pouted slightly, looking at him out of the corner of her eye. “You’re luring me into a false sense of security. You’re gonna poison that tea, aren’t you?” she teased, though only half-heartedly.

“If I were, I wouldn’t be telling you about it,” he said, “Just don’t eat any deep mushrooms that I give you. They’ll be poisoned for certain, but not by my hand.” He stood and went over to where they had piled their supplies to pick out an iron pot. “I’ll go get some water for you. I think I spied some of the herbs that I need by the river side on our way here, crystal grace and royal elfroot. It should help you with the coughing.”

She watched him as he walked down towards the river, that slow steady pace that he always walked at. She supposed she should have been suspicious, him being so nice to her, but her brain was too foggy to manage it. “You’re never going to let me live this down, are you?” she asked when he returned a short while later, carrying the water and a handful of herbs. She frowned at herself the next moment; here he was trying to actually be nice to her for once and she couldn’t seem to shut her smart-assed mouth. “Sorry,” she said, ducking her head. “I’m so used to picking arguments with you, I don’t think I know what else to do.” She pressed a fist to her mouth, trying to stop the next coughing fit. “Ughhhh, kill me now.”

“It is not as if you have done so without reason. I was not the most cordial while being a patient. I have never been very good at taking orders,” he said as he hung the pot over the fire, ignoring the look the dragon gave him as he took a knife from his belt and cut up the herbs before he threw them into the pot. He looked over the supplies they had, but they had only taken one tent with them from the bandit camp. “We will need to find a cave or somewhere more sheltered from the wind and snow while you recover from your illness. But something close enough to the river for food and water.”

She wrinkled her nose at that. “A cave? Oh joy,” she groaned. Though she supposed it would be better than sitting out in the elements. “Sorry. I’m not a very good patient either,” she said with a slight laugh, but it made her choke up again. “Damn it all,” she croaked and reached for the water, taking another sip. She snorted. “Maybe you and I have more in common than we thought,” she said and shivered, pulling the pelt and blanket around her again. “Wish I had that resistance to illness or whatever it is that you have.”

He smirked at that. “It is resistance built up over a thousand years of life. Whatever illness plagues you, I have had it at least once in my youth. I am immune to most sickness because of that reason alone,” he said simply as he moved to pick up a cup from the supplies as well as a spoon while he waited for the water to heat up. “I suppose half of why I am such an... exceptional... patient comes from the memories I have of the healers from my time. They were not pleasant memories and I resented them treating me like I was some invalid, some helpless child.”

Ellie frowned. “I suppose I haven’t been treating you much better,” she said. She stared at the pot over the fire, watching as the water began to boil. She wondered if the herbs smelled good; she couldn’t smell a damned thing at the moment. “I didn’t mean to do that. I just… when you started off saying how much you wanted to die, it rubbed me the wrong way. I’ve taken care of so many who wanted to live and didn’t make it. You wishing for death just… I don’t know. It got to me. And I’ve been a pain in your ass ever since. On purpose,” she admitted. She looked at him, not certain what she was doing or trying to say. It was the sickness, she could blame it on that. “I don’t want to hate you, or make you feel like I hate you. Cause I don’t. I… I don’t know what I’m trying to say. I can’t think straight,” she nearly whined and leaned forward on her elbows, covering her face with her hands.

He tilted his head at her, pausing to ladle the hot tea into the cup for her. “Perhaps we both were not prepared to deal with something we did not want to. I would be agreeable to starting fresh with you, if you would like. I am starting to see why I should not have said what I did, but my friends had all just been murdered and there was nothing left for me. I didn’t know if there could be anything more to life beyond that.” He offered the cup to her and sat down next to her side. 

“I guess I understand that,” she said as she took the cup and blew across the top of it. The steam curled up around her face, already making her nose feel slightly less stuffy. “But where would Jennifer and I be right now if it wasn’t for you? We might’ve still been trapped in the eluvian and have starved to death. Or if we had figured a way out, we would’ve been raped and killed by those bandits.” She paused and took a long sip from the cup, groaning softly as it eased the scratchiness in her throat. “So maybe in a weird way you do have something new to protect. Us. Even if we are a couple of shemlens, as you like to call us.”

“I am starting to see that you are perhaps, more than that. Especially if Solas sees so much in the strange woman enough so that they have a child together. I am glad to have a purpose again. I must admit, it is odd to stay awake once the attack is over, but my duty is not finished yet. I will make certain you both are safe before I decide where life will take me once more.” He gave her a small smile. “Thank you for putting up with my stubbornness. It seems that I have much to learn about this waking world.”

“You do,” she said with a nod and sipped more of the tea. Oh, that felt so much better already. “I mean, yeah, the world is sort of crazy right now, what with everything that’s happened. But it’s not all bad. Could be worse, I’m sure. Things can always be worse.” She looked down at the cup in her hands. “You planning on running off somewhere? I’m so used to being around you every day now. I think I might almost miss you,” she teased.

Abelas chuckled at that, giving her a look. “Like a rash, I would imagine,” he teased her. “Finish your tea, then we will make a makeshift bed for you to sleep on out here. Jennifer and the babe will be plenty warm in the tent on their own. I will make certain you are warm and protected out here,” he said firmly, already thinking of laying some more furs down next to the fire. He would have to use his body heat to warm her back, but he found he didn’t mind that idea more than he probably should.

Ellie gave him a look that clearly said she didn’t like being told what to do, but then finished off her cup of tea anyway. “Thank you,” she said softly to him and set the cup aside. “You going to stand watch over me while I sleep?” she asked. “But you need to sleep, too.” Something about the way he vowed to keep her warm and safe made her heart give a little jump, made her feel a fluttering in her stomach. “Being sick is making me delirious,” she muttered and rubbed at her forehead. Now that she’d drank the tea and her throat wasn’t hurting as much, she felt incredibly tired. “I think I could fall over and sleep for a week now.”

“That would be part of the crystal grace,” he murmured as he stood up and rearranged the fur pelts that they had left near the fire and he laid down holding the covers up for her. “Come, sleep now. You will need all the strength you can manage to fight off what ails you,” he said, looking at her expectantly. Part of him was enjoying this, telling her what to do, but he wasn’t about to dare mention it.

Her eyes widened in surprise, but she was far too tired to argue. “Okay,” she said and crawled over to lay on her side next to him. A sigh escaped her as he wrapped the pelts around them and she found herself surrounded by warmth. She felt him scoot closer to her, his back against her chest, and her eyes widened slightly again. Oh, she liked that more than she wanted to admit. There was something comforting and safe about laying so close to him. It made her heart race, her breath unsteady. What was happening? Still, she snuggled into the bed he’d made them and a small smile spread across her lips. “You’re more cuddly than I thought you would be,” she said with a little smirk.

“You are smaller than your mouth suggests,” he murmured sleepily against her, “Now rest. It is likely your illness will be worse in the morning. If you need more tea through the night, just kick me as you are no doubt wont to do.” He smiled softly as she laughed the best she could. “We will see if Jennifer can make you some broth for tomorrow.”

It was stupid, she knew that, but it had been so long since she’d been held like this. She wanted to enjoy it, crazy as that sounded, even to her. She hesitated for a moment before she slid her arm back under the covers and found his hand, then pulled his arm around her middle. “Broth sounds good,” she murmured, her hand over his, holding his arm there, but loose enough that he could pull back if he wanted to.

He raised an eyebrow at her bold actions, surprised that she would do something like that, but then again. He supposed that he shouldn’t. He let his arm relax against her, pulling her back against him before he closed his eyes, “You are a strange creature, Elowyn.”

She managed a small laugh at that as she closed her eyes, enjoying the closeness and the feeling of being held. “Oh Abelas, you don’t even know the half of it yet.”


	10. Chapter 10

Abelas woke to the sounds of utensils scraping on a pot and the smells of a hot meal already being cooked. He blinked himself awake, somewhat surprised to find himself still curled around Ellie and even more surprised to find that he didn’t want to move. After being used to sleeping for years at a time had spoiled him. He looked over at Jennifer, who quickly turned her head back to the fire, but not before he saw the smirk on her lips. The little dragonling chattered at him from her shoulders as she tended the food. “I suspect that I am not going to hear the end of this now.”

“Not any time soon, but don’t worry. I’d do the same for anyone. She’s feverish, by the way. You curling up with her last night probably saved her life,” she said as she scrambled the wild bird eggs she had found with bits of the dried jerky. “Once you get up, you can go catch me some more fish. I’ll make a fish broth for her with some of the herbs you picked last night. More tea wouldn’t be amiss either.”

Ellie groaned as she blinked awake. She didn’t want to move. Partly because she was so warm, and partly because she felt like shit again. She looked at Jennifer through watery eyes, but didn’t have the strength to comment on the little smirk on the other woman’s face. A heavy sigh escaped her and she curled her fingers, lacing them with Abelas’ under the blanket. “I don’t want to move,” she croaked, letting her eyes close again. Her mouth was dry as if she’d been snoring all night long. She turned her head slightly to look at Abelas. “I didn’t keep you up all night, did I?” she asked softly, but then remembered she was supposed to tease him. That was how they communicated, right? “If I kicked you, I really want to remember doing it.”

He smiled softly at that. “Not at all. You forget that I could sleep through an attack on Skyhold being destroyed by two dragons.” He gave her hand a squeeze and stood up. “Yours was slightly less louder than that.” It earned him a swat on his leg and he shook his head as he moved to pull a heavier shirt on over his tunic. “I will return momentarily.” 

She was almost disappointed to see him go, but she snuggled under the blankets, trying to keep the heat in. “I hope I don’t make you or Olivia sick,” she said to Jennifer. “I won’t go in the tent again until I’m feeling better. Having a sick baby would be horrible.” She slipped her hand out and grabbed the water skin, taking a long drink from it. She managed an almost apologetic look for Jennifer. “I know your cooking is the best, but I don’t think I’m very hungry this morning. Please forgive me if I don’t eat it.”

Jennifer smiled at her and nodded. “Don’t you worry. The only thing I’m going to have Abelas get you to eat is the fish broth that I’m going to make you when he gets back with the fish and the herbs. I wish I had some honey and some of my Gramma’s herbs to make you feel better. That stuff would have you on your feet in no time. Sadly, we will make due with what we have,” she said as she stirred the eggs, determined to keep them hot for the elf when he returned, “Did you sleep well dear?”

“Like a rock,” Ellie answered. “I woke up nearly hacking up my lungs, but Abelas made me some tea and that helped.” She didn’t want to admit that Abelas’ arm around her and his solid warmth at her back was what had really helped her to sleep. She turned her head towards the river, smiling softly even though she couldn’t see him. “You know, he can actually be really nice when he wants to be. There may be hope for him yet.”

“Everyone here’s been through so much, I’m not surprised he’s taken this long to get his feet under him. It helps that he’s got something to do now, rather than laying in bed and feeling useless.” She chuckled, “It might sound bad, but your sickness is probably good for him. Gives him another thing to protect.” 

“Well there’s that silver lining I was looking for,” Ellie said, laughing slightly, though she instantly regretted it. She hacked and coughed until it felt like she might not be able to draw another breath. She forced herself to sit up, struggling to breathe, shivering as the blankets fell away. She held out a hand to stop Jennifer, who looked like she was about to come closer. “Don’t… want to… make you… sick,” she managed between gasps and coughs. She grabbed up the water again, forcing herself to swallow it down, though she almost choked on it as well. She finally sucked in a deep breath and flopped back down on the makeshift bed. “Just leave me out here to die.”

Abelas shook his head as he approached and set the fish on a hot stone next to Jennifer. “Now that sounds familiar. I think I will return the favor and say, no.” He gave the herbs to the woman who accepted them gratefully.  He turned back to Ellie as he sat down on the ground and began to filet the fish as Jennifer instructed him to put the pieces inside of the pot so she could make the fish broth for the elf to eat. “For one who tried so hard to keep me alive, I could do no less for you.”

Ellie huffed. “I didn’t really mean it,” she muttered, laying her arm across her forehead as she stared up at him. His brow furrowed slightly in concentration as he butchered the fish, but otherwise his expression seemed calm, relaxed, and perhaps just the tiniest bit happy? Maybe Jennifer was right. Maybe Abelas having someone to take care of was good for him. It was nice to see him softer like this. He looked so much more handsome. Another jolt of surprise shot through her, and she wanted to shake herself. She was beginning to care more for him than she should. “You’re enjoying this far too much,” she scolded.

“Perhaps I am,” he said, sparing her a glance. “Not that I take any enjoyment from your sickness,” he said as he finished up. He accepted the bowl of scrambled eggs from Jennifer as she took over the fish stock for Ellie. He sat back as he cradled the bowl, his hand going out to brush back the strands of hair that had become plastered to her forehead. “You should lay back down, da’len.”

Ellie shifted around to find a more comfortable way to lay, her eyes closing as his fingertips brushed across her forehead. A smile tried to work its way across her lips; she rather liked him calling her da’len, although she wasn’t entirely sure why she liked it so much. Maybe because the way he said it almost sounded affectionate. “Bossy, bossy, bossy,” she said, though her tone lacked any bite to it. “There will be no living with you now.”

Jennifer peered over at them, a warmth blooming in her chest at the way he looked at her, the way he tucked the fur around her shoulders to keep her warm until her food was ready. Abelas was a man of purpose and that purpose was to protect those who could not do so for themselves. It was admirable and Jennifer knew it was why he had been so unhappy when he had survived his encounter with Morrigan. How could he protect while he had an injury? The dragon chirped at her and she smiled, leaning her head against it. She looked to her cat that was sprawled by the fire, “You there, go make yourself useful and be a medicine cat to Ellie.”

The cat blinked slowly at Jennifer and licked his whiskers before he went over and crawled onto Ellie’s chest. The elf eyed him warily. “You’re not going to scratch me again, are you?” she asked before she weakly reached up and scratched behind his ears. “You know, he’s not so bad when he’s calm like this.” The cat was a warm comfort to her, but it was nothing compared to when Abelas had held her, and she silently wished that he would lay back down with her again. But she felt guilty, laying around when she knew they needed to keep looking for Solas. “I’m sure after I have some broth I’ll be fine,” she lied. “We can get going in a little bit. I know we need to keep looking for Solas.”

Jennifer shook her head and stirred the pot, turning to grab some of the herbs so she could sprinkle them into the broth. “Hush. You are sick and you need to rest, not walking about in the snow and wind. Solas will…” She trailed off, her heart aching as she thought about the elf. She missed him terribly, the dimple in his chin, the way his eyes lit up whenever he talked about a subject he was fascinated with. The way he held her when they slept, the way he looked when he held their daughter. She blinked away the tears that sprang to her eyes and she swallowed deeply. “Solas will find us.”

Guilt curled in Ellie’s chest as she saw the expression on Jennifer’s face. She turned away with a huff. “Stupid cold,” she muttered. She sneezed and wiped at her eyes again, half-tempted to claw them out just to relieve the pressure in her head. If only they could find Solas… She blinked as a sudden thought struck her. “What happens after we find him?” she asked neither of them in particular. “Skyhold is gone. Where will we go?”

Jennifer paused at that, blinking as she ladled some of the fish broth into a bowl for Ellie. What came after they found Solas? After they found everyone for that matter. “I’m not sure. I… I don’t know what comes after this. Not even an inkling. Solas…” She trailed off, “Solas has some plans. To make the world a better place for elves, but to do so safely so that no one is harmed.” She turned and handed the bowl of broth to Abelas who had finished his eggs. “Make sure she doesn’t spill that all over herself.”

Ellie sat up slowly, biting back a groan as her body protested. Perhaps she was even sicker than she realized. “Thanks,” she said to Jennifer before she turned her attention to Abelas. “You gonna spoon feed me?” she managed to tease. She reached out for the bowl, her hands shaking slightly. “I can do it,” she insisted. “I’m not completely helpless.”

Abelas chuckled and handed her the bowl, but didn’t let go until he was certain that she had a good hold of it. “We shall see, Elowyn,” he said softly, watching her carefully for a moment before he looked to Jennifer, “I should scout ahead for something that will provide a more suitable shelter while she rests and recovers from this illness. Staying out here in the elements will only make her condition worse.”

Ellie frowned, pausing with the bowl halfway to her lips. “You’re leaving us?” she asked a little too quickly. She didn’t like the thought of that at all. She slurped down some of the broth, not even noticing the way it seared her throat. “I can travel. Really, I can. Just let me drink this down and then we can go. I…” She looked down at the bowl again, her face going red, her ears burning. “I don’t think we should split up.”

“And here I thought you would have jumped at the chance to be free of me for a little while,” he said, “I will set wards while I am away. Hopefully it will not be very far.” He could see the concern on their faces. “I do not want to leave you alone for very long, not after what has happened before. Though, if anyone does come along,” he said, trying to lighten the mood, “you can always throw the dragon and the cat at them.”

Ellie cast a sidelong glance at the cat. “Oh yes, because he is so vicious,” she answered. She lifted the bowl to her lips again and took another long drink. “Go on then. Jennifer and I will be fine. And if we’re not, I will come back and haunt you until your dying day,” she threatened. “Which for you will be a VERY long time.” She drew her knees up as she watched him prepare to go. Why was it bothering her to let him leave? Before, she would’ve gladly told him to get lost. Well, okay, maybe that was a lie, but still, she wouldn’t have felt this strongly about it. “Abelas,” she said suddenly, turning towards him, “I… You… Just be careful, dammit.”

Abelas paused as he was about to head out, his walking stick in hand and he almost didn’t recognize her voice it was so soft. He smiled at that and walked back over to her, resting his hand on her head. “I will. Rest now, da’len. You will need to have some energy to travel, lest I have to carry you. With my leg, that will be a sight for the ages,” he said before he turned and headed out, placing protective runes as he went. 

Ellie huffed and finished off her bowl, then set it aside and crossed her arms. “Carry me,” she snorted. “I’d like to see him try.” She shivered and sneezed again, then laid down under the covers. “He’d better be okay, cause if he’s not, I’ll hunt him down and beat him with that walking stick.” She blinked at how protective she sounded of him and quickly added, “Just… you know… for the inconvenience of it all.” It sounded lame as she said it, she knew it, and she looked pointedly away from Jennifer who smirked at her again.

“You are very adorable when you are all flustered over his safety. Not that I don’t doubt your resolve to beat up a man who might be injured, but you know,” she said as she took the bowl from Ellie and set it next to the fire, then went over to the elf and tucked the furs around her. “You just relax, he’s a strong guy who shouldn’t be underestimated. Now that he has us to look after, he won’t be going off and taking risks that might harm himself or us.”

“I hope you’re right,” Ellie answered as she sank down further into the makeshift bed, unable to shake the feeling of worry for Abelas. She wished they’d progressed further with his therapy, that his leg was working properly. “I’d feel so much better if his leg was healed,” she admitted. “Sorry to say, but I’m no fighter. All of my magical training focused on healing. Without him, we’re pretty helpless out here. Unless you’re secretly some sort of assassin,” she said, fighting the urge to laugh. Laughing would only make her choke up again.

Jennifer laughed softly at that and she smiled. “Nope. Sorry to say, but we will be alright. We have to be. I can’t focus on that, not with Olivia and you to look out for. Solas will come for us or we will find him. We are going to make it. After that? I have no idea, but we will take life as it comes.” She looked over to where her little one was all bundled up, sleeping just inside the tent.

“Yeah, well life can stop fucking with us any time now,” Ellie grumbled. She scrubbed at her face with her hand. “I’m sorry, Jennifer. I’m not very good company today.” She groaned and let her hand flop back to the ground. She chewed her lip slowly, thinking over their earlier conversation. “So… Solas has plans to help the elves?” she asked. “Like what? Do you have any idea what he’s planning? You’ve made me curious now,” she admitted.

She gave the elf a look, remembering her oath to Solas. She really needed to look into getting that broken. It was becoming dangerous for her. “I’d tell you, but it might kill me. He wants to do something that will safely free the elves, make them immortal once again. All that jazz. I’m not entirely sure on the details. Abelas might have some idea, you could ask him later if you really want to have some idea. Perhaps you might give them some ideas as well.”

“Immortal?” Ellie asked, her eyes widening. “All of the elves?” She wasn’t sure how she felt about that, or how she  should  feel about it. Such a thought had never really crossed her mind, other than the occasional jab at Abelas about being old. In truth, she still had a hard time seeing him as being centuries old. He certainly didn’t look it. Her eyes narrowed questioningly. “Is… Is Solas immortal?” she asked, though the question sounded crazy even as it passed her lips.

Jennifer licked her lips, studying the elf for a moment before she nodded. “I think he is. And looks good for a thousand year old elf, wouldn’t you say?” She sighed heavily, “Gods above, I miss him. He should find us. He should hurry up and find us. Then we can be out here for as long as it takes. We could make it for sure.”

“You’ll find him soon,” Ellie said quickly, glad to have something to say, because she wasn’t sure what to make of the rest of it. There were a million questions burning in her mind, but she thought perhaps that Abelas or Solas might be able to answer them better than Jennifer, who seemed a little reluctant to discuss it. She wasn’t sure what to think of the comment that talking about it might kill Jennifer. Surely that was meant as a joke, but perhaps it was just her way of trying to avoid the subject. Her head still felt foggy; maybe it would be better to talk about it later anyway. 

She changed the subject and they chit-chatted a bit, Ellie dozing off and on. Concern for the sentinel started to eat at her and she kept looking around expectantly for him. 

“Where’s Abelas? He’s been gone for a while.”

“I am here,” the elf said as he made he way back into the camp. He gave a groan as he sat down near the fire, stretching his aching leg out near the fire pit. “I found a cave that is just north of here that should suit our needs,” he said as he stared into the flames, “However, there is something about it that puts me at unease. I have never felt as such ever before in my many years of life. We have little choice. There is a storm rolling in from the west and it will not be good for any of us to be caught out in it.” He looked to Ellie, “Especially you.”

“I’ve been uneasy ever since that dragon attacked Skyhold,” Ellie said sniffling and rubbing at her nose. “Anything would be better than getting caught in a storm this time of year.” She shivered, really not wanting to get up, but she forced herself to get to her feet. The air was miserably cold, but the sooner they moved, the sooner she could lay back down again and get out of this wind. She started to fold up the blankets and furs, packing them tightly into a pack. She could see the clouds on the horizon. “Let’s go. I really don’t wanna end up drenched.”

Jennifer nodded. “We will deal with whatever we find there. I wish I had some sage, maybe all the cave needs is a good blessing to make it feel at home. I’ll see what I can do when we get there,” she said as she watched Abelas go over to help Ellie finish packing up the stuff they needed. She packed away all of their supplies and strapped them to one of their horses. “Ellie, you or Abelas should ride the other horse. Maybe both of you. I can walk with Olivia and the dragon,” she said, “No need to make you feel any worse than you already do.”

“That’s not fair to you,” Ellie protested, even as she wavered on her feet. It was like her energy was sapped, making her feel weak. A sigh escaped her and she went to the other horse. Mostly they’d been walking, just using the horses for pack animals, but she honestly didn’t know if she had the energy to walk to this cave. “I hate feeling so fucking helpless,” she growled under her breath. She looked to Abelas. “Well, come on. You get on first.”

Abelas raised an eyebrow at the woman before he shook his head and reached up to pull himself onto the animal, mindful of his leg as he did so. As he settled himself onto the creature, then reached down, offering a hand to Ellie to help her. He chuckled at the way she looked at the horse. “It doesn’t bite. Unless you make it mad.” He pulled her up and settled her in front of him before he reached around her to grip the reins of the animal. “It will not take us long to get there,” he said, looking down at Jennifer who led the other horse while holding her daughter. “With luck, we will get there before nightfall.”

And for once, luck was on their side. The last bit of light was fading to black by the time they reached the cave that Abelas had found. Jennifer’s feet were aching, but with the approaching storm, she knew that there was no time to rest until they had their supplies and horses safe and dry inside.

The cave was just big enough for the horses to fit, and it seemed dry. The air was warmer inside, especially without the wind blowing on them. Ellie carefully slipped down from the horse and went to help pull the supplies from the other one, making sure to keep a fair distance between herself and Jennifer. “We should set up the tent for you and Olivia,” she said, then added, “and Abelas. I don’t want to get anyone sick. I can sleep outside of it and be fine.” Though even as she said it, she noticed the uneasy feeling of the cave that Abelas had mentioned. It was almost a feeling of being watched, that they weren’t welcome. But that was crazy. The cave didn’t appear very deep and there was nothing and no one here. 

Abelas shook his head. “You will need warmth. I will stay outside of the tent with you as well. We will get a fire going and lay out the furs. You need to rest,” he said as he moved to help Jennifer unpack the supplies. He didn’t like this cave. There was a hum in the air. Almost like singing. He could see Jennifer trying to do everything with one hand firmly around her child. “You are trying to do everything while holding that little one,” he said as he leaned down and built up a fire. He knew there was no alternatives, Ellie couldn’t or wouldn’t hold the little one as she was afraid of giving the babe her sickness. 

Jennifer laughed and nodded. “Then you’d better sit down and warm up,” she said and walked firmly over to the sentinel and handed him her baby. She grinned at the startled look on his face and she smiled brightly. “There, you’re a natural. Now sit down and take your weight off of your leg. I’m going to get us some dinner started and then we can set up the tent,” she said firmly, going to pull a fur off of the horse and moved to drape it around Ellie’s shoulders. “I’ll do what I can to get some medicine brewed up for you soon.”

Abelas blinked down at the little one he suddenly found his arms full of the little bundle. “This is not what I meant,” he said dryly, but stopped when the bundle squeaked at him and wiggled in his arms. Olivia stretched and reached up towards his face, touching his chin. It was light and soft, and he could feel his heart wrench at the little thing. “I suppose it is not entirely intolerable.”

Ellie froze the instant she saw the baby in Abelas’ arms, the way his expression softened ever so slightly. It made her heart completely melt. “Awwwww!” she gushed, but clapped a hand over her mouth at the look he shot her. She turned quickly away, knowing she had spoiled the moment, but she couldn’t help herself. She groaned the next moment, pinching the bridge of her nose, trying to relieve some of the pressure there. She chanced a glance over her shoulder at him, and tried to give him an apologetic grin, but it came out rather pitiful with her eyes all watery and her hair a mess, the end of her nose red. “You’re hooked now. Admit it,” she said, nodding at the baby in his arms.

Abelas looked up, a smart retort on his lips, but he froze when he saw Elowyn. It struck him how lovely she looked, hair everywhere, face red, eyes tearing. “And give you more things to try and embarrass me with? I think not. However, this little one is not as… troublesome as I initially thought,” he murmured, looking back down at the babe.

“Mmhmm,” Ellie hummed skeptically. She looked over at Jennifer. “Give it another five minutes. Olivia will have him wrapped around her finger.” She drew her knees up and rested her chin on them, wrapping her arms around her shins as she watched Abelas with the little one in his arms. Though he initially looked shocked to find his arms full with the baby, he now looked almost serene. “Do you have any kids?” she asked him suddenly as the thought entered her mind. 

Abelas stared at the little one again for a moment before he looked up  at Ellie. “No,” he said softly before looking back down at the child. “As sentinels, certain things were expected of us. Not that we could not partake in frivolous activities, but that we had to keep our heads about us. As sentinels we had to often go into uthenera after we protected the temple of Mythal. Not the best environment to raise a little one,” he said as he ran a hand over the baby’s head.

There was something about the way he said it that stirred something deep in her chest. Perhaps it was the soft tone of his voice, or the expression on his face, she didn’t know. “You’re awfully good with her,” she said softly, smiling as the baby grasped at his chin with her chubby little fist. “Do you want kids now? Now that you don’t have to do all that uthenera stuff?” She blinked and sat up straighter at the rather personal question she’d just asked. “Sorry, never mind. That’s none of my business. I… I don’t know why I even asked. My brain is all fuzzy today. Ignore me,” she apologized, rubbing at her forehead.

He smiled softly at the little one before he looked over at Ellie. “I haven’t thought about it, to be honest.” He sighed and leaned back against the cave wall. “I doubt there are any in this world who could stand my ‘charming’ attitude, as you so lovingly put it,” he said as he looked back to Jennifer as she bustled around the fire, the dragon and the cat curled up next to each other, sharing the warmth. “Peace is not easy for me to know.”

“Aww, c’mon. Any woman would be crazy if she didn’t want you. You’re always so upbeat and happy, smiling all the time. You’re such a people person!” She couldn’t keep it up and laughed at her own silliness, but once again paid for it with a coughing fit. It took her several moments to recover. “Oh, this is like instant karma for making fun of you. It’s a bitch-slap every time I laugh,” she groaned. She moved to lay down next to the fire, pulling the pelt more securely around her. “I think the cat and the dragon have the right idea,” she murmured as the wind outside picked up and the freezing rain began to fall.

Jennifer chuckled at the two of them and shook her head as she turned from the pot. “Food is ready. Just in time for the cold rain,” she murmured as she saw the sheets of rain fall. She shook her head at it and went over to gently take Olivia from Abelas and she smiled at the small pout she saw on his face. “Oh don’t worry. I’ll let you change her diaper later if you are this torn up about her.” 

Abelas gave the woman a look and he shook his head. “I think I’ll have to restrain myself,” he said as he pushed himself up and went over to the horses to begin unloading the tent. “Allow me to set up your private tent where you may change her at your discretion,” he murmured as he unfolded it. The song seemed to throb in his head and he paused for a moment as he looked around, his eyes unfocusing and he shook his head. “I will be happy when we get out of this cave. It is unsettling.”

“Maybe the rain won’t last long,” Ellie said. She felt it too, heard a strange sort of humming like a song that seemed to come from all around her and yet nowhere at all. “This place is fucking weird,” she muttered. She sniffled, feeling a miserable ache in her bones. “I think I’d give just about anything to see Solas come strolling in here. Maybe then we could find a better place to settle. Or I could make sure you are safe with him, Jennifer, and then I could go on to a city. Places like that always need healers. I’m sure I could find work there.”

Jennifer gave a smile at Ellie as she nested her baby between her legs as she reached for the stash of herbs from earlier. “Wish I could go home for just a moment. I would grab everything I need that would have you back on your feet in no time. I could make you this medicine my Gramma taught me how to make. Lots of eucalyptus, mint, and lavender with a dollop of honey, a splash of whiskey. That’d knock you out, but when you woke up, the cold would be on its way out.” She nodded.

“Or you could just knock me over the head. That might make me sleep better,” she muttered. A mirthless snort escaped her. “I should be able to take care of myself with this. A damn healer who’s sick as a dog? Oh yeah, that makes a lot of damn sense.” She groaned again, rolling to lay flat on her back and stare up at the ceiling. “Not like I have the right supplies with me anyway. That herbal tea you both have been making for me is about the best thing for it anyway.” She pressed her hand to her forehead, a throbbing settling into her skull. “Am I the only one who hears that damn singing? It’s giving me a headache!”

“I hear it as well,” Abelas said as he finished and walked back over to them, kneeling in front of the fire to scoop up a ladle of the fish stew Jennifer had made somehow from the fish and potatoes that he had brought her that morning. It amazed him what the woman could do around a fire pit. “Whomever has taught you to cook, has taught you well, Lady Jennifer,” he said as he handed her a bowl before he turned back and scooped up the hearty broth for Ellie.

“Do you hear it too?” Ellie asked as she sat up and accepted the bowl from Abelas. “Well at least I’m not completely crazy,” she muttered when he nodded. She blew across the bowl, then sipped at the broth, though she couldn’t taste it much. “It doesn’t make any sense. Where is it coming from? There’s nothing here. It’s just us!” A small relief swept through her as she realized that talking seemed to drown it out just a bit. “I feel like I’m losing my mind. I’m about tempted to take my chances in the rain.”

Jennifer gave her a look. “You’ll do no such thing. If you go out there right now in your condition, the chances of you surviving the night are going to be zero,” she said as she ate her own bowl of stew. “With luck, the rain will stop for a little bit tomorrow and we can move to somewhere else. Somewhere Solas would eventually go to find us.” She worked her lip between her teeth as she thought. Maybe there was a shrine to Fen’Harel nearby that he would think to check. She would have to ask Abelas later. She smiled down at her baby as a large yawn split her little face. “Aww, someone’s ready for bed,” she cooed. “Unless you guys want the cuddly baby.” 

“I’d love to hold her, but I shouldn’t,” Ellie answered honestly. “And I won’t go out in the rain, MOM.” She snickered a bit at the look Jennifer gave her, then quickly downed more of the broth. She smacked her lips with a sigh and set the empty bowl aside. With the warm crackling of the fire, the sound of the rain, and a stomach full of hot soup, Ellie felt like she really could get some good sleep. “Go on and take her to bed. We’ll be fine out here. And, you know, if whatever’s causing that singing attacks us, it gives you more time to escape,” she said with a wink.

Abelas watched as Jennifer chuckled at them and bade them goodnight before she vanished into the tent with her daughter. He finished off his own meal before setting the bowl aside and moved to grab a stick that he used to stir the fire, laughing as the dragon squeaked at him and crawled into the fire. He laughed and added another log to the outside. “Very well, but you must keep the fire going, little creature,” he told it before he moved to get more furs for Ellie and himself, “How are you feeling, da’len?”

Her heart gave a little skip when he called her da’len again, and she couldn’t stop herself from smiling a little. “A little better than I felt last night. But that singing sound isn’t helping,” she answered and moved to lay on her side facing the fire. She looked up at him, chewing her lip for a moment. It wasn’t nearly as cold in the cave as it had been out in the open air, there really wasn’t a reason for him to lay down next to her, and yet she wanted him to anyway. “So do I get the honor of spooning you again? Or was that just because you took pity on me last night?” she teasingly asked, the corner of her mouth twitching.

He refrained from rolling his eyes, but smiled. “I did say that I would stay out here to make certain you do not freeze to death,” he said as he moved to lay behind her like they did the night before. It was odd, yet familiar at the same time. He felt a protectiveness well up inside of his chest, filling him with the need to make certain that she would be alright. It was almost as if he could feel the sickness within her and he wished to lift it from her before it harmed her further. He settled down on the furs and pulled them up over their shoulders as he rested his head on his arm and stared back at the fire. It was a familiar feeling and he could almost lose himself in it instead of the mystery song.

Ellie didn’t even bother to try to hide the smile on her lips as she settled down with Abelas against her back. Whether it was real or imagined, it was as if he had his own sort of healing that comforted her. Maybe they had gotten off on the wrong foot, maybe they irritated each other a little too much, but she liked this. And she liked him, at least when he let his softer side show, when his voice didn’t hold that disdainful bite to it. She closed her eyes and wiggled back against him, then let out a contented sigh. “Now I feel better.”

He couldn’t stop the chuckle that escaped him. The way she said it, the tone. “Nothing like repurposing the stick in your ass to be the one you curl up with when you are sick,” he murmured, the warmth of the little nest they had made curling around him and making his eyes droop. It had been a long day. “I’m not used to being up at all hours for days on end. When will I get used to this awakeness?”

She thought about it for a minute. “I don’t know. I’m so used to it. You’ll get used to it eventually,” she answered, her voice soft and tired. “When I first met you, I wondered how you could sleep for so long. I can’t imagine it. If I sleep too long, I’m all stiff and sore.” She yawned deeply and blinked slowly at the fire. “But right now? I almost think I could manage sleeping for a few years straight.” Her eyes fell shut again. “Especially if we were sleeping like this,” she added sleepily.

Abelas stared into the fire, trying to not think about the way Ellie took his hand and pulled his arm around her. He was used to sleeping, but it was often alone, but not alone. Everyone slept in a communal area for sleeping in uthenera, surrounded by runes that would wake them should the temple be under attack. No one cuddled when they slept for so long, it was a weakness. This, however, this was pleasant enough. He surprised himself to admit. 

It took Ellie a while to fall asleep, even with the comforting sounds lulling her and Abelas’ solid warmth at her back. That damned singing just wouldn’t stop. And even when she finally managed to fall asleep, she still heard it in her dreams.

It was all around her, grating on her nerves, driving her mad. Even when she clapped her hands over her ears, she still heard it clear as day. She knew she was dreaming, she could recognize the Fade easily enough, and it still didn’t make the singing stop. If anything, it seemed to make it worse.

“Wake up, stupid,” she told herself, thinking that if perhaps she woke in real life, maybe then blocking her ears would silence the insufferable singing. “Stop it, stop it, stop it!” she demanded. But it only grew louder. “I can’t take this!” She ran then, trying desperately to rid herself of the song in her ears, the song with no intelligible words, the song that seemed to press in on her mind and threaten her sanity. 

She didn’t pay attention to where she ran, it didn’t matter, until she tripped and fell to the ground with an “Oof!”

Ellie blinked awake, finding herself not in the cave with Abelas and Jennifer. She pushed herself up, looking around in the freezing darkness as sheets of icy rain fell upon her. Had she sleepwalked out here? She’d never done that before. She got to her feet and wrapped her arms around herself. She couldn’t see the cave and with the storm raging, she couldn’t see or hear the river. “Shit!” she cried, shivering violently. Her bare feet ached from cold, every inch of her body seemed to sting and burn from the freezing rain. “ABELAS!” she called out, though her voice was so strained and scratchy that it probably didn’t carry far over this storm. “Dammit,” she sobbed and moved to sit under a tree, trying to get the smallest amount of shelter from the raging winter storm.

* * *

 

Abelas jerked awake, the incessant crying of Olivia harsh on his ears and the dragonling was out of the fire, pacing back and forth in front of the tent. When it spotted him awake, it hurried over to him, whimpering and chirping. The elf looked down and his eyes widened to find his arms empty. 

It was his nightmarish dream all over again. The horrors that had plagued his mind, Jennifer and Ellie raped and murdered in front of his eyes by bandits. Shemlen who held him down and laughed at his face that he had been too weak to save them. He shuddered as he remembered the rest of the dream. 

He had to find Ellie and he stood up, his leg not wanting to cooperate with him as he pulled on his boots. He looked to the dragon, “Where did she go?” 

He followed the dragon’s gaze outside of the cave and into the rain and he cursed the stars above him. What on earth would have compelled her to go out into that mess? He looked around and with little choice, he grabbed up a thick fur pelt and draped it over his head before he dashed out into the rain. “Elowyn!” he shouted.

Ellie could no longer feel her fingers, her toes, and she thought for sure the tips of her ears would fall off from the frost. It amazed her that she could feel so sleepy and be so frigidly cold at the same time. Her head nodded and she jerked back upright, trying to stay awake. Perhaps just sitting here was not the best idea, but now she wasn’t sure she could move if she had to. 

Something caught her attention. A voice? A voice on the wind, calling her name. Maybe it was just wishful thinking, or perhaps delirium had set in, but it sparked hope in her heart. “ABELAS?” she called back as loudly as she could, though her voice was weak. She moved her arms to push herself up against the tree, and she was nearly surprised that her joints didn’t crackle from the cold. “Abelas!” she hoarsely cried out again, tears coming to her eyes. Please, please let him hear her. She took a shaky step forward and fell to her knee. “Abelas,” she sobbed, doubting he could hear her at all. She was going to freeze to death out here.

Abelas blinked through the rain, the icy droplets starting to clump on his eyelashes, but then, in the distance, he heard her. “Elowyn!” he shouted and forced his legs into a run, jumping over a downed tree and finally skidded to a stop by a large tree, the thick branches shielding some of the rain from him and his eyes widened as he saw her. She was practically blue from the cold and he cursed under his breath and without a second thought, he quickly wrapped her up in the fur before he quickly gathered her up in his arms. His heart was beating fast, what if she died out here? What if she had just curled up and frozen? He grit his teeth and looked back the way he had come. They couldn’t stay in that bloody cave. It was too dangerous. “Shhh, da’len. I have you.”

Ellie sobbed in relief to find herself in his arms. Even though every inch of her seemed to scream with a freezing burn, at least if she died she wouldn’t be alone. “I d-don’t know how I g-got out h-here,” she stammered through chattering teeth. “I was d-dreaming and then I woke up here.” She wrapped her arms around his neck. He felt so warm. Oh, that was a blessing at this point. She felt like she was going to shake apart, she shivered so badly. But how was Abelas going to carry her back to the cave? And how had he gotten to her so quickly with his leg the way it was? She found she didn’t care much what the answer was so long as he got her somewhere warm. “So cold,” she whispered as she tucked her face under his chin.

He didn’t have much choice but to get them back to the cave or they would both be dead by morning, he was certain of that. His leg was already in pain from having run so far, but he pushed it from his mind. He had to get them back. He tightened his grip around her, murmuring in Elvhen at her to calm her down. Without the fur to protect him from the elements, he could feel the stinging cold rain more acutely than before and it soaked him within seconds.

She didn’t know how long it took them to get back to the cave, but the warmth of the place washed over her, making her skin sting in a whole new way. She didn’t know if she wanted to cry or scream or just lay on the floor and sleep for days. But she did know she had to be hypothermic at this point and that there was a good chance that she still might not make it until morning. “I’m sorry,” she whispered. “I f-feel so st-stupid.”

“Hush, da’len,” he murmured as he unwrapped her from the wet fur. Her skin was cold and he worried for her. She needed to warm up, but there was no way she would be able to in her soaking clothes. “Ir abelas, Elowyn. I must do this to save your life,” he said as he first stripped himself of his clothes, tossing the ruined shirt and breeches aside and situated himself on the furs as he worked his numb fingers over the ties of her own clothing. He kept his gaze on her face, holding her eyes. “Stay with me ,Elowyn.” 

He looked to the fire as the blaze grew brighter and he was surprised to see the little dragonling tugging logs to the fire before crawling into it and stirring up the embers. He smiled softly at the little lizard and inclined his head to it before turning back to the task at hand. When she was bare to him, he carefully arranged her under the fur blankets and pulled her to him. Her cold skin made him shiver, but he held her tightly to him, “Stay with me, da’len.”

She groaned as she found herself wrapped in his comforting warmth again, though her skin still stung and ached. “Not planning on going anywhere,” she tried to joke. She wasn’t even bothered by their nudity, and somewhere in the back of her mind, she was impressed that he knew how to handle this so well. His skin was smooth and firm against her, and had the situation been any different she probably would have been terribly flustered, but she couldn’t bring herself to feel that way at the moment. “How many times are you planning on saving my life?” she asked as she shivered against him, trying to drink in as much warmth as his body would give her.

“As many as it takes or until I die trying,” he answered automatically, blinking in surprise at himself as he did so before a smile curled his lips and he felt, what he could only describe as, happy. “You are my purpose now. If you go, I will have nothing,” he said quietly against her wet hair, “I will become nothing.”

His words made her heart warm and swell. A soft sob escaped her and she moved her arms to wrap tightly around him. She never would’ve thought she would feel such affection for this man, a man who had seemed so grumpy and sour and bitter at the whole world. But now she saw that wasn’t who he was entirely. He cared, whether he wanted to admit it or not. And now he cared about  _ her _ .  “I won’t let that happen to you,” she whispered, hugging him a little tighter. 

His heart clenched at that and he closed his eyes as he held her against him. She was so cold, he hoped that she wasn’t just saying that to make him feel better. He locked his arms securely around her, determined that if she would try and sleep walk again, she would drag him with her. He paused as he realized the next moment that the humming had stopped and movement at the back of the cave caught his attention. He blinked in surprise as he saw Jennifer walking back towards the tent from the darkness and she had a sour look on her face. There was a large rock in her hand with she dropped next to the fire and looked to them both the next minute.

“Red lyrium,” Jennifer explained, rubbing at her temples as the song faded, “Wouldn’t let my baby sleep. I destroyed it.” She looked back over her shoulder at where she had come from. She looked back at them, “You two were gone, I was so scared that you weren’t coming back.” She let out a heavy sigh and moved towards the tent. “Don’t go.” 

Ellie felt even more wretched if it were possible. On top of feeling frozen to her core, she felt guilty that Abelas had had to come after her, and guilty that they’d made Jennifer worry so. “My fault,” she muttered. “I was dreaming. Running away from the song. I must’ve been sleepwalking.” She hid her face against Abelas’ bare chest, and dared to slip one of her legs between his, seeking more warmth. A frown crossed her lips as she realized she was quickly becoming more of a hinderance than a help at this point. If they could just find a good place to rest for a few days, maybe she could get back on her feet and contribute again. She hated this. “Can… can we look for a town or something soon? Maybe we would all feel better,” she suggested in a tiny voice.

Abelas exchanged a look with Jennifer and he nodded the next moment. “I think that would be for the best. We will find the nearest town and stay until Solas can find us. I will cast a spell tomorrow morning that will point him in our direction if he comes near this area. With luck, we will be reunited within a few days and you will have conquered this illness.” He watched as Jennifer nodded and disappeared inside of the tent and he let out a sigh before he pulled the covers around them more firmly and he rested his chin atop Ellie’s head, “Rest now. You will not run again. I will keep you safe.”


	11. Chapter 11

“Finally,” Iron Bull huffed as they crested the top of a hill and the small town came into sight. He knew Solas wouldn’t want to stop for long, but at least maybe they could rest for a night or two and regroup. Traveling on foot and without supplies had taken a toll on all of them. But they had enough coin between them to rent a room and get some food, and that sounded very appealing at the moment. “Nearly there. C’mon. If we’re lucky, maybe some of the others from Skyhold made it here already. We might be able to get some news about what’s been going on.”

Dorian nodded, shifting the pack on his shoulders. One of the few things that hadn’t gotten carried off when the horse had bolted with their wagon. “I want a bath, a hot meal, and a warm bed. Then I am finding us another wagon and horse for before we continue on with our search,” he muttered and and tucked his staff onto his back as they made their way towards the town, “This cold and rain are absolutely miserable.”

“For once, you and I agree, Dorian,” Solas said. Normally Dorian’s incessant whining about the weather grated on his nerves. But not now. The cold and the wet were enough to make even Solas curse the outdoors. A hot meal and a soft bed would be amazing at this point. He walked a little faster, more eager than ever to reach the town. “It would be best if we could avoid drawing attention to ourselves,” he warned the others. He didn’t feel like a confrontation, or answering questions about Skyhold at the moment. 

“Hey, you say that like we stand out or something,” Bull protested. He ignored the look Dorian gave him and the way Krem whacked him on his unbroken arm. “You’re all no fun. A good old-fashioned bar fight might be just the pick-me-up we all need,” he grinned. “I may only have one good arm, but that’s all I need to toss some assholes around.”

Solas gave him a deadpan stare. “No, Iron Bull. Just… no.”

Krem rolled his eyes as he fell into step with Dorian and Solas. “Figures, big lug has already fought two dragons and he still wants a bar fight. There’s no pleasing the Qunari. And as far as keeping a low profile, if you think that we can do that with two Vents, an elf, and the largest Qunari on the planet we could find, then I wish I had your imagination, Solas.”

Bull chuckled at that. “See, Solas? No point in trying to keep our heads down. They’d still see the horns anyway,” he said as they reached the tavern and he held open the door for the other men. He ducked in after them, groaning softly as the dry warmth of the place washed over them. “Get us a table,” he said to Dorian. “I’ll get us some rooms and drinks.” He squeezed the mage’s shoulder and headed off to speak to the barkeeper.

Dorian smiled and nodded, watching the man go for a moment before he headed over to a corner table away from the door and near the large fireplace that was crackling merrily. “Well, it’s not entirely a shit hole,” he said as he shrugged off his pack and lowered it to the ground next to him, then reached up to take Solas’ bag as well so he could pile them up together. His eyes skimmed around the tavern, trying to see if he recognized anyone, but nothing jumped out at him. Well, the uneasy stares and a few hateful glares that were sent that way stood out, but he was past caring in that moment. “I hope he remembers the food.”

“Not sure if they wouldn’t try poisoning it first,” Krem said as he lowered himself into the chair with a sigh and leaned his head back. “At this point, I’m not sure I’d care. You two mages can mix up an antidote, right? Nothing to worry about,” he murmured as he let his eyes fall closed for a moment as his body greedily soaked up the warmth.

“I’m certain they get lots of travelers through here. I don’t think poisoning is anything we need to concern ourselves with this evening,” Solas said as he took a seat at the table. The glances of the other patrons of the bar didn’t go unnoticed by him, but he didn’t really blame them. He knew he and his companions looked horrible, their clothes wet, dirty, bloodied. And Bull always stood out wherever he went. “Let’s just eat and get up to our rooms so we can clean up and rest. I hope Jennifer is somewhere safe,” he added quietly, watching the rain splatter on the windows.

Bull returned to them a few minutes later, mugs of warm spiced wine in his hands, and he passed them around the table. “Food will be here in a minute,” he said and drank deeply from his tankard, smacking his lips. The warm drink settled in his belly, warming him from the inside out. Though his posture was relaxed, his eye kept a sharp lookout around the tavern. Like Solas, it was all too easy to feel the gazes of the other people there. He caught Dorian’s slightly concerned look. “Don’t worry yourself, Kadan. They’re just impressed. They’ve never seen horns like these,” he boasted.

Dorian sighed as Krem snorted into his drink and he shook his head as he drank from the mug Bull had brought him. The wine was the perfect temperature of hot and spiced just enough to have his tongue pleasantly tingling. “Ah, where has this been all my life,” he murmured into it, letting the heat wash over his face as he sighed into the beverage. “I hope their food is spiced similarly.” He let himself sink into his seat, leaning against Bull’s side as he rubbed at his face, looking over to Solas. “And don’t worry. Jennifer and Olivia are in good hands. I’m certain Abelas knows a thing or two about wards. Even so, she knows a trick or two with that magic of hers.” 

Solas gave a nod, staring at the mug in his hands. “You’re right, of course. Still I cannot help but to worry,” he said as he lifted the cup to his lips and took a long swallow. He looked over as the barmaid brought them their food, steaming bowls of stew and crusty bread. Though he knew he needed to eat, he didn’t feel very hungry. He tore off a piece of the bread and dunked it in the stew, taking a bite. “I’m afraid I am still spoiled to Jennifer’s cooking,” he admitted. He ran a hand down his face, feeling guilty for sending her through the eluvian. Perhaps that hadn’t been the safest option, maybe he should have sent her across the bridge with everyone else. Damn it all. It was as if he now second-guessed his every decision.

The Tevinter mage smiled sadly as he dug into his own food. “I know what you mean. I miss having those two sisters already. My stomach is much too accustomed to their delicious creations. You know, I would love to have a quick trip back to their world. I rather miss the way that place has food just littered everywhere,” he said as he swallowed another spoonful of the stew, his eyes catching on some of the patrons across the way. He didn’t like the way they leaned towards each other, whispering and looking their way.

Solas watched them with mild interest, hoping that something else would catch their attention. And moments later, something did. The pretty barmaid brought them their drinks and one of the men said something to her. Though Solas didn’t hear what was said, he could see the offended look on her face and the way she stuck her nose in the air as she turned to walk away. The offending patron scowled and reached out to grab her ass as his companions laughed. 

“How dare you!” she cried and turned sharply, smacking him across the face.

The other men at the table howled with laughter, but the gruff-looking man looked even more sour. “You little bitch,” he snarled as he got to his feet, nearly knocking the table over in the process. “C’mere.” He grabbed the waitress by the wrist and yanked her closer to him.

That was not the distraction Solas had hoped for. But he was not about to sit around and watch this poor woman be harassed while she was simply trying to do her job. “Let go of her!” he demanded as he got to his feet, his hand reaching back to curl around his staff. 

One of the men at the table stood up and moved to stand in front of his friend and the barmaid. He looked down his nose at Solas and sneered at the elf, “Mind your own business, knife ear. Don’t you have some stables you should be mucking out? Or serving your masters over there.” He nodded back towards the table.

Dorian dropped his spoon with a clatter and pushed himself to his feet before he could think better of it. He shook off Bull’s hand on his arm and gave the man a look before he walked over to stand next to Solas, his eyes narrowing at the drunkard. “I do believe my friend made a very reasonable request of you gentlemen to let the lady return to her work, but now, you owe him an apology,” he said taking his staff from his back and pointing it at the man, “And I won’t be taking no for an answer.” 

Solas narrowed his eyes at the slur thrown his way; it stung more than he would ever admit aloud. But then again, what should he expect from humans? However, Dorian’s reaction was surprising. “Let. Her. Go,” he said in a dangerous tone. He could still see her struggling to pull away from the man’s grip, a frightened look in her eyes. 

The entire place had gone so quiet, it would have been possible to hear a pin drop. Every eye was on the confrontation happening in the middle of the establishment.

“Fuck off, knife ear,” he spat, “She likes it. She just doesn’t want to admit it. Isn’t that right, sweetheart?”

Solas swung his staff around, aiming an ice spell at the barmaid’s attacker, and hit him square-on. The reaction was instantaneous; the whole tavern broke out into a brawl and it was hard to tell who was on whose side. Or perhaps there weren’t sides, just a bunch of men who only needed the slightest excuse to jump into a fight. Tables overturned, chairs were swung, punches thrown, curses and insults shouted. The maid ran for the bar with a shriek, and hid. 

Bull casually sat back in his chair and drained his cup, sighing heavily as he pulled it away, and smacked his lips. A lazy sort of grin spread across his face as he looked at Krem, and excitement sparked in his eye. He rose from the table and rolled his shoulders, flexing the fingers on his unbroken arm. “Let’s crack some skulls,” he grinned, then turned and grabbed up the first person he saw and flung the man across the room with a roar.

Krem grinned and took up a spot in Bull’s blindside and ducked low to flip another man over his shoulder, throwing him towards a table that shattered and broke under the force. He grunted as another person punched his face and he growled. “That was a lucky hit. Hope you liked it, that was the only one you’re gonna get.”

Solas found it was rather hard to twirl his staff around in such close quarters; he ended up smacking someone in the face with it. He shrugged and ducked a punch thrown his way, slamming his shoulder into his attacker’s stomach and knocking the man flat on his back. “Childish,” he grumbled to himself and turned to face another. 

It was all fun and games until one idiot made the mistake of grabbing Bull’s broken arm. The Qunari roared as pain jolted up his arm and he drove his big fist into the man’s face. “Alright, I’m done fuckin’ around,” he snarled and grabbed another man by his hair, slamming his face into a tabletop, and let him drop unconscious to the floor. “Who’s next?!” he bellowed in challenge, the pain just fueling him on.

Dorian jerked back, Solas’ staff smacking him in the nose and then his shoulder. “Ugh, this is why mages can’t fight back to back in close quarters.” He wiped his nose on the back of his hand, streaking the blood across his face as he threw himself into another group of men that were getting ready to attack them, using his staff to smash them over the head, elbowing another in his stomach. He glanced over his shoulder, eyes widening, “Solas! Sword on your left!”

Solas turned, throwing up his staff with both hands to block the sword that swung at him. He growled through his teeth as the attacker pressed harder, both men trying to shove the other one back; it was the man who had grabbed the barmaid. “Curse you,” he hissed, then stepped back without warning and the man fell face-first to the floor. Solas raised his staff to crack the man over the head, but before he could bring it down, he found his feet swept from beneath him and he landed painfully flat on his back on the wooden floor. The wind was knocked from his lungs and he gasped, the back of his head ringing with pain as he blinked up at the ceiling. “No,” he groaned and sat up quickly, diving to push the sword out of the other man’s grasp.

“Get off!” the man roared and drove his elbow back, slamming it into Solas’ nose. He was not about to be insulted by a pathetic knife-ear. He reached out, his fingertips brushing the grip of his sword, but he was unable to grasp it. “Damn you!” he cursed as Solas struggled to pin him down. He rolled and swung his fist up, catching Solas across the cheek, and the elf hit him back in turn.

Many of the other brawlers had heard Dorian’s warning cry of a sword being drawn and decided to flee the tavern. They tripped and scrambled over the broken furniture and unconscious bodies of their fellow patrons in their hurry to escape.

“Cowards!” Bull called mockingly after them. He was breathing heavily, a grin on his face and a rush of adrenaline singing through his veins. He turned and nearly laughed as he saw Solas and the man trading punches, rolling on the floor, both of them cursing. He righted an overturned chair and sat down, leaning one elbow on his knee. “C’mon, Solas! Kick his ass!” 

Krem came to a stop next to Bull, leaning heavily on a broken table as he caught his breath. “Damn Chief, almost as brutal as those drills you put us through in the morning. Shit, but these drunks don’t hold a candle to you,” he said as he wiped the blood from a cut on his forehead that was starting to drip into his eye. He watched as Solas hit the bastard on the floor once more, holding his fist up as he waited for the man to retaliate, but he was out cold. “Shit, that’s a nice right hook you have.”

Dorian sucked in a deep breath as he looked around; the bar looked absolutely wrecked. They were the only ones left in the tavern and he shook his head. “Well, that escalated quickly,” he muttered as he limped over to the bar and reached over the side and sorted through the bottles there, the glass clinking together as he picked up a dusty bottle and took it with him back over to where their table had been. He shook his head and turned around towards the wall and slid down it until he was seated. “Vishante kaffas, didn’t even get to finish my food. Uncultured brutes.”

Solas lowered his fist and sat back, still straddled over the man beneath him. Blood dripped from his nose, his cheekbone ached painfully, and he was too pissed off to care. He forced himself to his feet and walked over to slide down the wall next to Dorian. A string of elven curse words slipped from his lips, and he reached over to snatch the bottle from Dorian. “Ridiculous,” he hissed and tipped it to his mouth, drinking deeply.

“Ah, that was a good little skirmish,” Bull said as he leaned back in his chair. His heart was pumping, the smell of blood strong in the air. He cast an almost predatory glance at Dorian, then gave the mage a smirk. “Anyone else as turned on as I am right now?” he asked.

Krem shook his head and went to sit on the other side of Solas. “Chief, no one is ever as turned on as you are. And I think I speak for two of us when I say, we don’t need to hear that you’re half cocked right now. Pun intended,” he muttered as he took the bottle from Solas when the elf offered it to him and he took a long pull from it.

Dorian snorted, nearly rolling his eyes at the Qunari. “As if you are in any condition to do anything with that bum arm of yours,” he retorted, but his eyes glanced over the whole package and he swallowed thickly at the hardness he could see straining against Bull’s ridiculous pants.

“Argh,” Bull growled and gave a dismissive look at his broken arm. “If I managed to conquer all those assholes with one good arm, I’m pretty sure I can still conquer you.” He took the bottle from Krem and took a solid swig of it before passing it back to Dorian. He looked around at the destruction of the tavern with an approving smirk on his face. “You can’t blame me. It’s been forever since I was in a good barfight. Besides, word will spread around town now and no one else will try to give us any shit.”

Solas looked down at the knuckles of his right hand, which ached and stung. He flexed his fingers slowly, then dropped his hand to his lap and rested his head back against the wall. “I fear we will all feel this in the morning,” he muttered. He tilted his head to look at Dorian, unsure of what to say. He couldn’t remember the other man ever defending him before. “Dorian,” he started, “When you spoke up for me, defended me… You did not have to…” He paused and sighed sharply through his nose. “Thank you.” 

Dorian paused, the bottle halfway to his lips and he turned his head, giving the man a smile, ignoring the way the blood slipped past his lips. “Don’t mention it, my good man. It’s an utter disappointment that barbarians still think that they are superior to you, yet they use such crude methods of insulting. I’m sorry that they even called you that. It’s a wonder you haven’t written us all off as pathetic excuses by now.” He sighed and leaned his head back against the wall, looking up at the ceiling as he took another drink from the bottle, the liquid burning like fire down his throat and warming his belly. He handed the bottle to Solas as he thought about their conversations before, about how sorry he was, what he could do to make up for his fellow countrymen. 

Oh Dorian had no idea how close to the truth he was. “I had,” Solas admitted as he stared at the bottle in his hand. The corner of his mouth twitched slightly. “For a long time, I thought all humans to be barbaric. Funny how a year’s time can change such a strong opinion,” he mused softly, then drank from the bottle again and passed it on to Krem. A slight buzz settled into his brain and he wasn’t certain if it was from the alcohol or from the fight, but he welcomed it either way. Perhaps it would be just enough to let him get a decent night’s sleep. “We should finish that off and then go up to our rooms. We’ll all be entirely useless tomorrow if we don’t get some rest.”

Krem laughed. “Riiight, I hope they have some thick pillows to block out the noises. Like the Chief is going to go quietly after that fight,” he said as he drank a generous portion of the bottle, “Don’t suppose you have some kind of mage meditation technique you can teach me really quick to block out those two love birds?”

Solas managed a smile for Krem. “Why certainly. All you must do is stick your fingers in your ears.”


	12. Chapter 12

Dorian sighed as he ran his hands over the muscles of Bull’s chest, still warm from the bath they had shared. He smiled as he watched his fingers slip through the oil he had poured out, tracing nonsensical patterns over the Qunari’s skin. “Just had to go and break your arm, didn’t you, Amatus?” He hummed as he looked over at the appendage that was still in its sling, more swollen since the barfight not an hour ago. “What am I going to do with you?” he muttered, digging his fingers into a hard knot on Bull’s side. 

“Let me remind you that I broke it saving your ass,” Bull answered just before he leaned his head back into the pillow, a hiss slipping through his teeth. His hips lifted slightly off the bed, his length hard and aching already. He wasn’t joking in the tavern about being turned on, and if anything Dorian had only added fuel to the fire over the past hour. “You’re taking advantage of me, Kadan,” he lightly accused. He slid his hand down Dorian’s back and gave his rear a firm squeeze. “And you’re enjoying it.”

He couldn’t stop the smirk that tugged at his lips and he flicked his gaze downward, drinking in the length that stood up proudly from the nest of curls between Bull’s legs. “Oh hush, as if you aren’t enjoying it. Besides, were our situations reversed, you know full well that you would be teasing me, if not more so than what I am doing to you, savage,” he huffed, but let his hand slip down to curl around the base of the impressive girth and gave the man an appreciative squeeze. His mouth watered to see the bead of precum appear at the tip and the fire in his own belly grew at the thought of sinking down onto the member. “We have the time, Amatus. Let me enjoy you while we can,” he muttered as he leaned over and swiped his tongue over the tip.

A low moan rumbled in Bull’s throat at the teasing brush of Dorian’s tongue. He wasn’t used to this, to letting Dorian take control of their bedroom activities, but he figured he could make an exception this one time. He reached down and slid his fingers through Dorian’s hair. “More,” he breathed, rocking his hips up towards the mage’s face. He moaned again as Dorian’s tongue laved along his shaft, making his already hard flesh twitch and throb. Oh, how he wanted to grab the other man, to pin him down and have his way with him. This sort of willing submission was torturous. “Damn it, Kadan.”

Dorian smiled against the other man’s flesh as he moved down between his legs. He looked up at Bull, meeting his gaze with hooded eyes as he nuzzled at the thick length in his hands before he pressed hot kisses along the girth before he slid his tongue up over a vein that was throbbing beneath his lips. “Mmm, it is quite the sight, seeing you like this,” he breathed before he squeezed at the base and finally took pity on the man. He sealed his lips around the tip of his cock, moaning around the hard flesh, sinking slowly down over the cock. 

“Oh fuck yeah,” Bull breathed heavily, lifting his hips again as Dorian’s hot mouth covered his aching cock. The mage’s tongue was soft and slick, working over the hard flesh, making Bull’s pulse race and his breath quicken. “Mmm, suck it,” he softly commanded, feeling his cock twitch in the other man’s mouth. “That’s so good, Kadan.” He pulled Dorian’s head closer, his cock slipping deeper into that inviting mouth. His fingers curled in Dorian’s black hair as he shallowly thrust up. “Just like that.”

Dorian moaned around the flesh in his mouth, breathing deeply through his nose. Bull’s heady scent filling him as the Qunari guided his head. He could feel his throat stretching, burning slightly at the girth of his lover and he knew he wouldn’t trade this for anything. He let his teeth graze Bull’s length for a moment before he swiped his tongue over the flesh and swallowed him down to the hilt again. His own length throbbing painfully between his legs. 

Bull cried out in pleasure as Dorian descended on him, his cock throbbing pleasantly in the wet heat of Dorian’s mouth and throat. “Shit,” he growled out, thrusting up a bit more, feeling his climax fast approaching. He writhed slightly, enjoying it, torn between wanting to make it last and his need for release. Of course, they did have all night. He curled his fingers around the back of Dorian’s neck and pulled the mage’s face tight against his body as he came with a roar of pleasure, his body tensing and jerking from the sheer intensity of it all.

The mage groaned with pleasure as he tasted the hot seed in his mouth and he made sure to drink him down, not missing a drop before he finally pulled back, lapping the softening length clean before he sat back on his heels, lifting his hand to whip his mouth with the back of his hand before he crawled over the Qunari, draping himself over the man so that his cock was trapped between them. “Mmm, so good, Amatus,” he breathed, gently rocking his hips against the other man, unable to stop himself.

“Damn,” Bull breathed, rubbing his hand up and down Dorian’s back, pausing to knead the firm flesh of his rear. He groaned softly as he felt Dorian rocking against him, making his sensitive flesh begin to harden again. “Kadan,” he rumbled, trailing his finger along the line between the mage’s ass, teasing the opening to his body. He smirked at the way Dorian gave a little jump and rocked harder against him. “Come on then. You know you want it.”

Dorian whimpered against Bull, rocking into his skin before he pushed back against Bull’s fingers. His mouth watered at the thought of sinking down onto him and he couldn’t wait. He reached behind him, grasping Bull’s wrist and drew it up, pushing it above his head, resting it on his horns. His hand looked so small as it curled around the Qunari’s wrist, the contrast of their skin colors was eye catching. “Be a good Qunari and hold still,” he said in a husky voice as he reached behind himself, moaning out as he pushed a few fingers into himself, stretching himself apart for a moment. He could feel Bull hardening against him already and he swallowed thickly. “How’s this for bottoming from the top?” he teased. 

Bull chuckled, letting Dorian pin his arm in place. “Better than I thought it would be,” he answered, watching Dorian’s face as the mage touched himself. Damn, that was hot. He lifted his hips, pressing the tip of his cock up against his lover. He could feel the oil from Dorian’s fingers making his body slick and Bull had to bite his lip, an ache settling into him again. After the stress and everything from Skyhold, they hadn’t had a moment to themselves like this. Now it was time to make up for it. “Enough teasing,” Bull growled low in his throat, rocking up against the mage again.

“Brute,” Dorian grit out from his teeth as he withdrew his fingers and grasped Bull’s cock in his hand, steadying him before he sank down on the thickness. It still stole his breath away every time. The burning stretch sent a jolt of continuous pleasure through his body as he slowly worked his way down on the man, inch by delicious inch. He tilted his head back, pausing and taking a moment to catch his breath before he reached back, parting his cheeks before he sank down further, muttering in Tevene as he felt incredibly full. 

Bull threw his head back as Dorian’s tight heat engulfed him. He squeezed his eye shut as he lifted his hips, pressing his length deeper into the mage’s body. “So good,” he rasped, thrusting up slowly, giving Dorian’s body a moment to adjust to him. He wrenched his wrist from Dorian’s grasp and reached up to grab the back of his head, pulling him down into a searing kiss. “You’re incredible, Kadan.”

Dorian was finding it hard to form words as the pleasure sizzled through his body and he could only manage a nod in return, clenching his muscles around the girth penetrating him deeply. He swallowed and kissed Bull passionately, moaning as he opened his lips to the other man, inviting his tongue into him as he nipped at him, his hands running slickly over Bull’s arm, up to grasp a horn firmly. “Amatus. I have you,” he breathed as he pushed down against the Qunari, his mouth open as the length slipped in further. 

A moan escaped Bull’s throat as he slid his tongue into Dorian’s mouth, exploring the warm cavern, tasting the sweetness of it. It made the moment so much more than just a physical pleasure and his heart warmed. Dorian’s hand on his horn sent a jolt of primal lust through his system and he gave a sharp thrust up, impaling the mage deeply on his cock. His hand slid down Dorian’s side to grab his hip, pulling him down as he thrust up again, and again, each movement harder and more forceful than the last.

He shouted out as he was seated fully on Bull’s body, pushing himself to sit up on the man as he reached behind himself, fondling the man’s balls that were flush against his ass. He bit his lip, feeling precum dribbling down the side of his cock as he looked at Bull, catching his eyes as he raised his own hand to run it down the plains of his chest, pausing to pinch his own nipples, moaning out as he did so. Squirming on the man’s cock, he let his hand drop to his lower abdomen and he pushed on the slight bulge there, crying out as it pushed his prostate up against the hot steel of his length. “Maker’s breath, Amatus. I can feel you here.”

“Shit,” Bull hissed, feeling Dorian’s hand pressing against his length. He let his hand slide around to his lover’s front and curled his fingers around Dorian’s cock. He always admired how Dorian was able to take all of him, and how he seemed so eager to do it, so eager to please. His toes curled at the feel of Dorian’s other hand on his balls, teasing them, rolling them in those expert fingers. “Ride me,” he commanded, pressing himself up harder as he stroked the hard cock in his hand, slick with the essence that slipped from the tip. 

Dorian shivered as the large hand curled around his cock and he bit his lip hard as he narrowed his eyes at the man and he lifted himself up until only the broad head was in his body and he pushed himself down with a long moan and began to ride the Qunari with gusto. He braced himself over the other man, raking his nails down the man’s chest, still slick with oil. “Amatus,” he breathed out, “I want you. I need you to come inside of me. Fill me, please! Warm me, heat me up from the inside out.” He moaned as he clenched around the man, dragging himself up and down the hardness. He couldn’t get enough.

Oh fuck, how those words enflamed Bull’s lust, drove him crazy. He powerfully thrust up, driving himself harder and faster into Dorian’s tight body, grunting with every jerk of his hips. It was so good, he was so close… “Fuck!” he cried as he came forcefully, his cock pumping and twitching, pouring deeply into Dorian. “More,” he growled, never slowing his pace, stroking his lover faster, tightening his grip around the hard length in his hand. “I want to see you come now.”

Dorian gasped as he felt Bull’s length pulsing within him and he barely had a moment to register his words before they caught up with him, and his body obeyed, striping Bull’s chest with his cum as he threw his head back, guttural and needy, “BULL!” He screamed and his legs clenched around the other man’s waist as he spent himself. He bit the inside of his cheek until he could taste blood. His heart was full and Maker, he didn’t have a word for it. He loved it. “Amatus,” he sighed out, he wished there were words for what he felt. For what they had between them. He could feel the tears welling up in his eyes as he thought about it. What would he be thinking if he had been separated from Bull just as Solas had been from Jennifer? And their child, no less. He didn’t know if he could be that strong.

Bull relaxed back into the mattress, panting to catch his breath. “C’mere,” he muttered and reached up to pull Dorian down to lay over his chest. He liked that, the feel of the mage’s weight on top of him, both of them sweaty and breathless, sated. The tears in Dorian’s eyes weren’t missed on him and he rubbed soothingly at his back. “You alright, Kadan?” he asked softly. A slight smirk touched his lips. “You know you can’t get all emotional like that and expect me not to notice.”

Dorian turned his face into Bull’s neck, his body going pleasantly boneless as he relaxed, completely at peace. Except for the thoughts that plagued him. He wrapped his arms around the ample chest, feeling the man studying him as he did so. “It may sound silly, but,” He paused, licking his lips as he thought about it, “I’m not sure what I would have done, had we been separated. Everything that we have been through, we have had the luxury of being together. Not one of us kidnapped or anything like that. I’m not certain if I am strong enough should something happen to either of us. I don’t want to find out.” He felt breathless at the sudden realization. “Marry me.”

Bull gave a jump and his eye widened as he looked down at Dorian. He chuckled, uncertain if the mage was serious or not. “Qunari don’t marry, Kadan,” he said, stating the obvious. “And even if we did, that’s no guarantee that something wouldn’t happen to me or to you.” He fingered the dragon tooth necklace around Dorian’s neck, letting the silvery chain slide over his finger as he thought about it. It really wouldn’t be any different than what they had now, would it? He studied Dorian’s eyes for a moment, seeing the uncertain nervousness there, the seriousness. “Alright. If that’s what you want,” he said and relaxed back against the pillow again.

Dorian didn’t know what he was thinking, asking that sort of question. “I know Qunari don’t marry. It isn’t fair for me to ask such a question, but we are practically wed by those standards, aren’t we?” he asked as he reached down to thumb at his own dragon tooth necklace. “It was foolish of me to ask, but…,” He trailed off and looked up, meeting his eye. “I want it. I want you. In every sense of the word, Amatus. You are my world. I would stand against Country, my father, and common rumor for you. Even against darkspawn and dragon would I stand by your side.”

“Aww, listen to you getting all sappy,” Bull teased, even though Dorian’s words warmed his heart. He gave the mage a soft smile. “And I would do the same for you, Kadan,” he rumbled and pulled Dorian in for a heated kiss. After a moment, he pulled back with a sigh. “We’ll make it official then. But maybe it’s best to wait until everything is settled down.” The corner of his mouth tugged upwards in a smirk and he clapped his hand to Dorian’s ass with a resounding  _ SMACK.  _ “Now stop acting so insecure. You know that bugs me.”

Dorian gave Bull an unimpressed look, but for the moment he was content. “You think I joke, you think you’ll make a joke out of it, but,” he sighed and sat up, Bull’s length slipping from his body as he settled himself next to the Qunari’s side. He threw an arm over the other man’s chest and buried his face into prominent pectoral, “I do not. I blame you, of course. It’s your fault that I cannot see my future without you in it. That I do not want to see a future without you in it. It’s your fault.” 

Bull chuckled again as he wrapped his arm around Dorian, and gave a nod. “Totally my fault,” he agreed. “I’ll take the blame for that one.” A contented sigh escaped him and he blinked sleepily up at the ceiling. “Get some rest, Kadan. You know Solas is going to want to head out first thing in the morning. We need the energy to either keep up with him or to argue with him.”


	13. Chapter 13

Andraste’s tits, traveling alone was the worst. Not to say that Varric hadn’t done it before, but he missed the companionship, someone to talk to along the way. Hell, even the banter had been something. And what he wouldn’t give for a horse, “Going to find the nearest town and talk the owner into a free meal and a Maker damned bed.” He muttered to himself shifting Bianca on his shoulder with the travel pack that Dot had made for him. The food was some of the best he had ever had on the road, but in the cold, he was starting to crave something hot. And he really really wanted to find Cassandra again. He had to find her, let her know he wasn’t dead even though by all rights he should be. 

“Help! Help me please!” a cry rang out just moments before a woman stumbled onto the road, her skirt torn and face dirty. Her mousy brown hair hung in tangles around her face, her eyes wide with fright. She gasped when she saw Varric. “Ser! Please! Bandits… they’re coming for me!” she sobbed, tripping as she approached him and falling to her knees. “They attacked us on the road! I just barely got away! Please help!”

Varric’s eyes widened at the sight of the woman and he immediately pulled his crossbow from his back, cocking it as he scanned the trees for the bandits. Just what he needed. “Get behind me. They’ll be dead as soon as they show their faces,” he promised her as he raised his weapon. He swallowed harshly, thinking of Cassandra and what sort of troubles she might have run into on the road or if she had encountered any while searching for him. He licked his lips and gripped Bianca tighter. 

She gave a frightened nod and scrambled back to her feet, practically throwing herself behind him. “Thank you,” she breathed, hovering perhaps a little too close to his back. A rustle in the underbrush of the trees made her gasp and she grabbed Varric’s shoulders, spinning him towards it. 

A man stepped out, a grin on his narrow face and his hands in the air. The light armor he wore was slightly too big for his slender frame and looked as though it had seen better days. As did the man wearing it. “Don’t shoot,” he said, though his tone was too casual, mocking almost. There was a cocky swagger in the way he walked slowly forward and he could see the distrust in Varric’s eyes. “You’re one of those guys who’s always gotta play the hero, huh?”

Before Varric could answer, the woman behind him laced her fingers together and swung with all her strength, knocking him upside his head. A grin split her lips as the dwarf fell chest-first to the ground. “Works every time.”

Varric’s head spun and he bit his lip as he landed on the cold ground. “Ah, fucking hell,” he cursed as he put two and two together, “Of course you are working together. Oldest trick in the book and I fell for it.” He tried to push himself up, but the world spun; she had gotten a really good hit on him. “Yeah, well, jokes on you, I don’t have any coin on me. All washed downstream.” He looked up at the man and the woman who stood over him and he reached for his crossbow that had fallen from his hands.  

The man moved and grabbed up the crossbow before Varric could reach it. “That’s alright,” he said with a grin, looking the crossbow over. “This looks valuable enough.” He looked to his companion, who dropped to dig her knee into Varric’s back, pinning the dwarf down with her weight. “Toss me that bag.” He caught it when she obeyed and he began to rifle through it. “Plenty of good food in here, too. Not a bad haul, really,” he commented casually, obviously pleased with himself.

He growled at the man as he picked up Bianca and took his food. “Don’t play with that, hot stuff, I’d hate to see you shoot your eye out,” he said, trying to think of something to do. He didn’t like seeing the crossbow in the man’s hands, it wasn’t right. “If it works, of course. Found it in a trash heap waiting to be burned. Might get you a few coppers for your trouble though. Good luck with that. And that food, you sure you want to be eating food you got off of a complete stranger? I could have poisoned that for all you know.”

The man eyed him skeptically, though he seemed hesitant to take any of the food from the pack. “Now why would anyone waste energy and resources carrying around poisoned food this time of year when food is so hard to come by?” he asked. Still, he didn’t like the prospect of eating potentially poisoned food. He stood slowly, staring down at the bag in his hands, then closed it up and slung it over his shoulder. “Don’t much fancy shitting myself to death. I suppose we’ll just have to bring you with us. If anyone’s going to be poisoned, it’s you,” he said to Varric before he looked to his companion. “Anya, tie him up. We’ll take him back with us to camp.”

Anya nodded and wrenched Varric’s head back by his hair before punching him in the face. Her too-skinny frame belied the strength she possessed. A smirk crossed her lips as Varric gave a strangled cry and his eyes went a bit glassy. She worked quickly, withdrawing a length of rope just long enough to tie the dwarf’s wrists together behind his back. “Stop fighting me,” she growled through her teeth as Varric tried to struggle. “You’re only going to make it harder on yourself!”

Varric nearly snorted with laughter, but the panic settling in his chest stopped him. As if anything in his life was ever given to him easily. He just wanted Cassandra. He would give anything just to have her in his arms again. He could still remember the look on her face when he let go to save her life, dropping into the waterfall. He never wanted to see that look ever again. 

His head spun as Anya yanked his hair back again. “Forget it, just take the damn food!” he growled as his arms were twisted painfully and he tasted blood in his mouth when she hit him again. 

“Nah, it’s too late for that,” he said, looking over the crossbow in his hands. “You put the thought in my head now. Someone has to taste the food before we eat it, make sure it’s not going to kill us.” He cocked the crossbow, and the corner of his mouth curled upwards at the smooth action. “You said you found it, huh? Not sure if it works?” He pulled the butt of the stock tight to his shoulder and aimed it at Varric. “Quit fighting her or we’ll see if this works or not.”

Varric grit his teeth and stilled as he saw his own bloody crossbow being aimed at him and wasn’t that one of the scariest sights he had ever seen. There was something about the two of them. There was a look in their eyes that were just slightly too wide, that something wasn’t entirely right with them. For better or worse, he was going to have to play along with this while he tried to think of a way out of the mess. At least this way he had a chance to steal Bianca back and still get something to eat. 

A satisfied sort of smirk touched Anya’s lips as Varric stopped struggling and she was able to tie his wrists together properly. She pushed herself up, clapped her hands together to brush them off, then yanked Varric up to stand. “Now come on,” she almost purred at him. “We were just getting ready to eat. You can join us for dinner.” She grabbed him by the shoulders to steer him back towards their camp, and couldn’t resist running her hands down his arms, gripping his large biceps. “Mmm,” she giggled, “You’re strong. Look at those muscles. I could just sink my teeth into them.”

Her companion threw his head back with a laugh. “Let’s get back to camp,” he said, falling into step next to Varric, the crossbow still pointed at the dwarf. “Don’t worry. It’s not a long walk.” He seemed pleased with himself, a bit too much of a smile on his lips and his tone conversational as they walked. “So what’s your name?” he asked as if he were just making an acquaintance and not taking a stranger prisoner. “I’m Bryce, by the way.”

Varric flicked his eyes to the crossbow and then back ahead, watching where they were going. He was a little bit more than creeped out about the whole,  sink my teeth into your arms . He wondered if the bandits would recognize his name from his books, the Inquisition. The last thing he needed was the Merchant’s Guild or the Carta finding out he was some prisoner in a two-bit bandit camp. He would be dead before morning. “Anthony.”

“Anthony, huh? That doesn’t sound like a dwarven name to me,” Bryce commented as they walked, the snow crunching beneath their boots. “Though I haven’t met many dwarves, to be fair. Hmm,” he hummed thoughtfully, then shrugged his shoulders. “Well for what it’s worth, sorry for the inconvenience, Anthony. Nothing personal, ya see. Just, it’s winter. Everyone’s hungry. We can’t let our people starve, ya know? What were you doing out here on your own anyway?”

“Getting mugged by bandits, it seems,” Varric said, rolling his shoulder forward, trying to ease the ache in his joints. He was starting to get an increasingly bad feeling about this. “Aside from that, just traveling around. I’m a nug herder by trade, but wouldn’t you know, someone ate my entire stock for the winter and now I have to wait until spring to start up again. You really want to make some coin? Sell nugs to those peacocks in Val Royeaux. If they think it’s in style, they’ll pay through the nose for it.”

“Really?” Bryce asked, interested. “Shouldn’t be surprised. Those nobles are all weird as shit up in Val Royeaux. Heard they keep the little vermin as pets, carry them around in purses or some shit.” He could see the fire of their camp just up ahead. “Still, you picked a bad time of year to be just traveling around. Doesn’t take much for a person to freeze to death out here.” He raised an arm in greeting as they neared the circle of tents around the blazing fire. “Of course, there are worse ways to die than that.”

Varric snorted at that. “Tell me about it,” he muttered as he eyed the camp. A small troupe of bandits then. Immediately though, he could tell something was wrong. There was a nagging feeling in the air and he bit his lip as he narrowed his eyes and glanced around. There was a pot of something over the fire that smelled off and gamy. He grit his teeth. _ ‘Okay, Tethras, talk yourself out of this one.’ _

“You don’t want me here then, eating up the food you worked so hard to steal from me. Gotta take care of your own, right?”

“Aye, we do. That’s why we need to test this food on you and make sure it isn’t poisoned,” Bryce answered, shooting the dwarf an almost accusatory look. “Go ahead and sit down by the fire. Warm up. We’ll eat here in a bit,” he said, nodding towards the fire pit before he turned and disappeared into one of the tents.

Anya steered him over and pushed him to sit on the ground. There was a slightly excited look in her eyes as she gazed at him, sitting down next to him. “What’s the matter? You look upset,” she said, oblivious to the obvious. “You get to eat, you have a warm fire. That’s better than a lot of other people have right now. You should be grateful we found you, Anthony,” she said, leaning in closer to him as if she had no concept of personal space. “We might’ve just saved you from freezing to death out there.”

If his skin could crawl away, it would be halfway to Kirkwall by then as the woman got closer to him. He pressed his lips thin. “I’d rather be freezing and starving, but on my way than being robbed and kidnapped. My mother is sick, if you have to know. I was on my way to her when you all stopped me. Now,” He trailed off and closed his eyes, bowing his head, “I’ll never make it in time before she goes.”

She tipped her head in curiosity, still not pulling away from him. “You never know. You might see her sooner than you think,” she answered. Her eyes roamed over him again, a slight smile on her lips and a hungry look in her eyes. But she gave a jump and pulled back the next second when Bryce returned and tossed the pack of food at her. “What?” she hissed.

“Make him try some of that. We’ll see if it’s safe to eat or not,” he said and sat down by the fire, watching Varric with intense interest. Others in the camp ventured from their tents, peering curiously at the dwarf. “Go ahead, Anthony. Eat up,” he said as Anya pulled out the first of the rations, untied Varric, and offered some to him.

Alarm bells were starting to go off in his head as the other bandits started coming out towards the fire. He didn’t like this one bit. Still, this might be the only bit of food he would get for a while, he’d better make certain that they didn’t take it back. He ate quickly, the food still tasting as good as the day he had left the little cottage. Dot had some odd magick about her, but he thanked the Maker for that. He would have starved without her aide.

Bryce smiled and reached over to help himself, his stomach growling. “I figured you was lyin’,” he said as he tore off a hunk of the bread and offered the other part to Anya. “No one in their right mind would waste food right now. It’s too hard to come by in these parts.” He sank his teeth into the bread, chewing slowly for a moment before he suddenly gagged, a bitter gritty taste filling his mouth, and he spat it back out. It was like blackened ash that fell from his mouth and he grabbed up his water skin, rinsing his mouth quickly. “The hell is this?!”

Anya gagged as well, wiping her tongue with the cuff of her sleeve. “Is this some kind of fucked up dwarven trick?” she demanded. It didn’t make sense to her, she’d seen the dwarf eat it just fine. But the second she’d bitten into the bread, it changed somehow. “Is it cursed? What the hell is it?!”

Varric blinked, looking at the food they spat out, it looked as if they had taken ash from the fire and eaten it. If he hadn’t just seen them eat the food for themselves, he wouldn’t have believed it. He would have laughed if he didn’t think they would kill them for it. “Ah, it might be. Forgot to mention some woman took me in a little while ago when I was sick. I think she dabbled in magick.” Dot had worked a spell on his food so that only he could eat it? 

“You let us eat something cursed by a witch?!” Bryce snarled. He was still choking, that horrible bitter taste in his mouth. He swigged more water and swirled it around in his mouth before he spat it out again. “You sonuvabitch.” He punched Varric in the face, knocking the dwarf over on his side. “Stupid motherfucker.” He got to his feet, pacing, feeling the eyes of the others on him. They hadn’t eaten in a couple of days and he knew his people were counting on him to bring them back something to eat. He shook his head as his fingers went absently to the cord around his neck, fingering the red stone that hung from it. “Can’t go another night without food,” he muttered.

The world spun before Varric’s eyes as the punch knocked him to the ground. He could feel his lip split from the force of the hit and it took his vision a moment to get into focus again. He looked over his shoulder at the man. “Shit, I didn’t know she charmed the damn food! It didn’t do that for me and how was I supposed to know?” He briefly wondered if they had asked for food and he had willingly given it to them, if it would still turn to ash. He wasn’t in a giving mood to find out at the moment. He focused on Bryce, his mouth opening to try and talk his way out of the situation when his eyes landed on the red glow around his neck and his eyes widened. “Shit. Get that thing off of your neck! That’s red lyrium! It makes you crazy!”

“Shut up!” Bryce spat and turned abruptly, kicking Varric in the stomach. His hands shook as he balled them into fists at his sides, pacing back and forth. The song was loud in his mind, nearly drowning out the sound of Varric’s voice. “Bullshit,” he whispered loudly to himself, grabbing at his dirty hair, “Fucking cursed food, witchcraft, this is BULLSHIT!” He grabbed up the pack and the rest of its contents, then slammed the whole thing into the middle of the fire. He stood there, panting heavily, watching with a crazed look in his eyes as he watched the pack catch fire, the contents inside blackening. With a pop of his neck, he slowly turned his face to look at Varric. “You’ll pay for this, for tricking us.”

A lance of fear went through Varric as he held his arms around his stomach as he watched Dot’s gift to him burn away into nothing. “Shit, I didn’t know about that. I should be thanking you for getting that cursed food away from me. We’re both victims here,” he tried bullshitting them, but he doubt it would work. When red lyrium was involved, nothing was for certain.

“Liar,” Bryce hissed and stomped over to Varric again. “I just watched you eat that shit and it didn’t try to kill you!” He punched Varric again, and again, his rage only seeming to grow with every passing minute. “Stupid fucking dwarf!” he spat. 

He finally pushed away when his arm grew tired and his knuckles bled. He sat back on his rear, pressing the heels of his hands to his forehead. “No, can’t starve again tonight. Can’t. Won’t.” He suddenly looked over at Varric, his eyes gleaming with madness. “If we can’t eat your food, we’ll just eat you.”

He tasted blood in his mouth and his head was pounding. He was fairly sure that his nose was broken. Again. Then hearing the words from Bryce that he was to be the main course, he didn’t doubt it for a moment. He swallowed hard and pushed himself up until he was sitting again. He had to look like shit at this point. “Trust me, you don’t want to eat me. Dwarves are all gristle and tough. Not too mention that witch might have put a spell on me too, might have made me taste extra bad on top of it all.”

Anya crept closer again, getting right into Varric’s face as she looked him over. “I’ve never had dwarf before,” she said, her eyes traveling down to his biceps, and she licked her lips. “You don’t look old enough to be gristly. Gristly was that old man we ate a while back. Tough old bastard. I thought I’d be pickin’ him outta my teeth for a week.” She swallowed harshly, chewing at her bottom lip. “That elf we ate was good, though. But dwarf is a new one.” Like Bryce, she wore a piece of red lyrium around her neck and she kept playing with it as she spoke to Varric. “I wonder what you’ll taste like.”

Shit. Shit, shit, shit. Where the fuck had they gotten the red lyrium? Wearing it like it was a piece of jewelry. He shuddered as he was reminded of Erimond and the necklace he had forced him to wear. He grit his teeth as he tried to scoot back on the ground, trying to get away from her, but his back bumped into the legs of another bandit who was looking down at him with that same crazed look in their eye. “I’m worth more to you alive than dead!” 

The group of bandits didn’t seem interested in hearing what he had to say. They were already talking amongst themselves, arguing over who got what part of him to eat, discussing the best ways to prepare the meat. Bryce roared for them to shut up, then tilted his head as he looked at Varric. “How do you figure that?” he asked. “How could you be worth more if we kept you alive?”

“Think about it, a surfacer dwarf traveling alone? I probably have ties with the Merchant’s Guild, maybe I run with the Carta. Probably more than one person would pay handsomely for my head. Enough to buy you a year’s worth of food for your merry little band.” Of course, he wasn’t going to stick around for that to happen. He was sure more than one person wanted his head on a pike. He really really didn’t like the look Anya was giving him or the way she pulled out a sharp dagger from her belt. 

Bryce eerily shook his head side to side. “That could take days, weeks to work out,” he said. “And that doesn’t put food in our bellies tonight. Nothing personal.” He stood and gave a nod to Anya, then took a step back, that starved, hungry look in his eyes. He looked around at his group. “We’ll eat well tonight, boys!”

Anya moved to stand behind Varric, grabbing him by his hair again. “He’s been properly tenderized already, too,” she said, looking down at the bruises already blooming across Varric’s face. She pressed her dagger to his throat, preparing to drag it across his skin and let him bleed out. “So hungry,” she muttered. 

A crashing noise through the trees made her jump and she looked up, her eyes widening as shouts rent the air. Her own people cried out in fear and anger as they turned to meet their attackers, a rival band of bandits. “Shit,” she hissed and threw Varric to the ground, stepping over him to join in the fight.

Varric’s heart was pounding as he hit the ground again, but he ignored the pain as he landed. He had to get the fuck out of there. The feeling of the blade against his throat was still there and he wasn’t going to give them another chance. He rolled over and pushed himself up, ducking a sword that was headed for his face and he ran, praying to Andraste that he could slip away unseen. 

He just kept moving away, the sounds of the fighting behind him getting quieter and quieter and his breath finally gave out as he fell to his knees, panting hard. “Fuck,” he gasped, running a hand through his dirty and blood stained hair before he looked up at the sky. He just wanted to get back to Cassandra. He swallowed and looked back over his shoulder; those bastards still had Bianca. He’d have to get his crossbow back. 

Somehow.


	14. Chapter 14

Ellie had never had a more fitful night’s sleep. She kept waking up coughing and sneezing, every inch of her body still feeling frozen, despite Abelas’ warm body against her. When she awoke again, it was to bright sunlight burning her eyes and she whined, snuggling deeper beneath the blankets. She could feel Abelas’ bare skin against her own, and though she felt miserable, that made her smile. The air on her face felt warmer than any she’d felt in a long time. “Nnnngh, morning already,” she murmured without opening her eyes, feeling Abelas beginning to stir behind her. “Can we just sleep all day?”

Abelas blinked awake, his arms tightening around the woman there and he suddenly remember how she had run out in the middle of the night. How he had found her half frozen just outside of their camp. How he had stripped them both down so he could make certain that she wouldn’t die from hypothermia. He swallowed harshly as she shifted in his grasp, her smooth skin caressing his own and his body responded in kind. He groaned and let his head fall forward into her hair. “Laying next to you is very distracting, Elowyn.” 

She gasped as she felt his length harden against her. It made her heart skip, then race, her breath catching in her throat. She pulled back slightly to look at him, realizing for the first time just how warm his golden eyes were. She reached up to slide her fingers through his long, silvery white hair, not knowing what she was doing, but wanting it all the same. “Abelas, I…” She started, but froze the next moment as she looked over his shoulder. “Where are we?” she gasped when she saw not the walls of the cave, but lush green grass, the burnt remains of a building, and the shoreline of the ocean beyond. 

The sentinel looked around, the tent from the cave was still there, but they were not. There was nothing around them that was familiar to him. He sat up, the covers falling to his waist as he looked around. “What sort of dark magic is this?” he asked, seeing the dragon sleeping in the fire, “It seems as though we have been displaced, but I know not of any magic that could do so.” He stood up, uncaring for his nakedness as he looked around a moment before he went and donned his pants. 

Ellie frowned as Abelas pulled away from her so quickly. There was something there, something about to happen, she was certain of it. It left her longing, and she didn’t like it. She wanted to call him back, to lay back down with him, but there was something strange happening here. She forced herself to sit up, her throat and lungs burning and heavy. “I don’t recognize any of this,” she said as she wrapped the blanket around her, covering her nakedness. There was a strange sort of carriage in the drive, and a large shockingly pink bag lying on the ground. “Jennifer!” she called out, her voice cracking. Maybe she would know of this place, could tell them where they were. She prayed that Jennifer was still in the tent.

Jennifer groaned and sat up from her bedroll. “It’s too early for this,” she murmured, looking to her daughter before she picked up the little bundle and moved to push back the tent flap. Ellie sounded worse than yesterday and she wondered if the elf had taken a turn for a worse. Well, she’d be surprised if she hadn’t what with her wandering out of the cave into the storm. “I’m here, Ellie. How are you feeling? Do you need anything?” she asked as she pushed the tent flap back, but stopped short as she saw their surroundings. “Oh shit,” she breathed and stepped out into the sunlight. She could see the confusion on their faces. “This isn’t possible. We’re… back in my home world.”

“We are?” Ellie asked, looking around in surprise. She felt a slight disappointment in that. “I always pictured it… shinier,” she said, not certain how to explain her expectations of the place. Her head throbbed, the pressure behind her eyes and in her nose almost unbearable at this point. “How did we get here? Is it safe?” She watched as the cat rolled happily in the warm grass and the dragon crept out of the fire, sniffing at the air. “Well at least they seem happy about it.”

Jennifer nodded. “Safer than back in Thedas,” she murmured as she looked around, pausing as her eyes drifted over the burned remains of the house. “Or not,” she said, but she perked up when she saw the herb garden around the back side of the house, “Well, that’s one good thing. My herb garden looks to be intact. I should be able to make you something for your cold that will knock it out of the park.”

“That would be nice,” Ellie said. Her lungs felt so heavy, like they were coated with something from the inside out, making it hard to breathe. Even though the air was warm, she still shivered, and she pulled the pelt tighter around her. Her clothes lay in a wet pile nearby and she sighed. “I’d offer to get up and help you gather the herbs, but I don’t think anyone here wants to see me like this. You know, all naked and shit.”

Jennifer grinned as Abelas coughed and turned away from them both, the tips of his ears turning a lovely shade of red, and she laughed. “Oh, I wouldn’t be too sure about that,” she said as she shook her head, “You just stay under those blankets though. I’ll see what herbs I can find and then maybe I’ll venture into town, see if I can’t find you something warm to wear. And diapers for my little girl. Gotta take advantage of the technology if we are going to be here for an extended period of time.” 

Abelas pressed his lips thin, definitely not trying to think about Ellie under those furs, bared to the world. She was ill and now was certainly not the time to be giving her unwanted attentions. He stooped down and frowned at his wet shirt but shrugged as he tugged it on over his head. The coldness of it making him shiver a moment before he reminded himself that if he could wade into freezing rivers to catch fish, this shirt was nothing.

Ellie watched him, confused at the way he seemed determined to avoid looking at her. Had she misread something? She felt for sure that there had been something between them, but maybe she was wrong. _‘_ _ Stupid,’  _ she mentally scolded herself, looking down at the grass instead of watching him. She cleared her throat, her mind still replaying that moment over, the feel of his body against hers. “I hope this remedy of hers works,” she said as she watched Jennifer busying herself in the garden. She sniffled and shifted around under the pelt. “Feel like I could keel over any minute now.” After getting caught in the storm the night before, she'd only gotten worse.

Abelas turned back towards Ellie at her words, worry creasing his brow. He went to her side, kneeling next to her. “Lady Jennifer seems to be quite skilled in these matters. I would assume that you are in the best of hands considering the situation,” he said as he reached out to her, brushing his fingers over her forehead, and he frowned at the heat that he felt there, “You are burning up, Elowyn.”

She leaned into his cool fingers, a soft sigh escaping her. “Taking a midnight stroll in the freezing rain probably wasn’t the best choice last night, huh?” she asked, a weak laugh escaping her. It turned into a groan the next moment and her eyes slid shut, leaning her head a little heavier into his hand. “I still can’t figure out how that happened. I never sleepwalk.”

“Jennifer said something about it being the red lyrium in the cave,” he murmured as he smoothed her hair back and off of her forehead, gathering her locks in his other hand so he could lift them off the back of her neck. He looked up, seeing the human starting to come back towards them carrying with her a fistfull of herbs. “I will see what water I can find for you. You need to stay hydrated and you are much too hot.”

Jennifer came back over and nestled her baby girl into the tent again, safely within the furs before she turned towards the fire pit. “There’s a well with a pump just over there. Should have plenty of cold water for us. I’ll need this pot full so I can make her a tea. Maybe you can refill our waterskins too?” she sheepishly asked him.

“I hope this works as well as you say it will,” Ellie murmured, watching Abelas go to fetch the water. She’d enjoyed the feel of his hands in her hair and part of her wished he would do it again. She finally tore her eyes away from him and looked to Jennifer. “So what do we do now? How do we get back to Thedas? I mean, I’m all good for staying here until winter’s over there, you know…”

Jennifer pressed her lips together as she started sorting out the herbs she had and she finally shrugged her shoulders. “To be honest, I’m not certain. From what Varric told me, he thinks that red lyrium was the reason behind the four of them making it into our world in the first place, but to get us all back, Dorian had to cast a strong traveling spell. I don’t think that happened. We were all just asleep and then we were here.” She thought about it some more. “I wonder if areas where red lyrium is abundant are like… I don’t know. Doing weird shit.” 

“That doesn’t sound good,” Ellie said. In truth, she didn’t know much about the red lyrium, other than it was supposed to be really bad stuff. But for it to somehow bring them to Jennifer’s world, well, she really didn’t know what to think about that. She tipped her head slightly, studying the other woman. “You don’t look very happy to be here,” she said softly. “Are you just worried about getting back to Solas or is there something else bothering you?”

Jennifer looked back over to Ellie, giving her a sad smile. “You see those burned remains? That used to be the house that Lindsey and I lived in. The townsfolk here blamed her and me for a lot of their misfortunes. Some things happened and in retaliation, they tried to kill us by lighting the house on fire with all of us in it.” She sighed and looked back towards the town. “I wonder what’s happened to it since we left. We put a lot of protections on it when we lived here.” 

Ellie blinked in shock. “That’s horrible!” she cried. She couldn’t imagine such a thing. Like Jennifer, she turned her head to look at the town, but she scowled at it. “I don’t blame you for leaving here, then. I would have left too. What a bunch of assholes.” She looked at the burned house again and felt her heart sink. What a vicious thing to do to someone, even someone unliked. Though she couldn’t imagine why Jennifer wouldn’t be liked. She was one of the nicest people Ellie had ever met. “You want me to go rough ‘em up for you? Or, you know, make ‘em sick? I can go cough on a bunch of people.”

Jennifer laughed at that thought. “Maybe. We will see what’s changed when we go into town later. Well, I will. I don’t think you need to be going anywhere until you get better,” she said, smiling as Abelas came back over carrying the pot and several water skins. “Thanks!” she said, fitting it over the fire and wasted little time in dumping the herbs into the water, “This will have her up and about in no time at all.” 

“Yeah, and I doubt I can go walking around your town without any clothes to wear,” Ellie said. She reached for one of the water skins and eagerly drank part of it down, the cool water easing the scratchiness of her throat. “Thank you, Abelas,” she said. She was pleased to see him getting around so well, even if he did still limp slightly. It was much better than he had been before. The corner of her mouth twitched. “I’ll have to find a way to make this all up to you.”

“I believe I am still in your debt, Elowyn, that is not necessary. The pleasure is all mine for the moment, to repay you as you have taken care of me. Hopefully with a bit more grace than when I was a patient,” he said with a faint smile, “Jennifer, perhaps we can stock up on needed supplies here before we find ourselves back in Thedas. We should be prepared as we are not certain when it could happen.”

“I wish I could go into town with you,” Ellie muttered. “I mean, I guess I still could. A naked elf streaking through their streets might be enough to freak out some of the people who’ve been assholes to Jennifer.” She gave a little laugh, her face screwing up as she fought the urge to cough. She reached out to accept the tea from Jennifer and sipped at it, breathing a sigh of relief as the hot liquid eased her throat and relieved some of the pressure in her nose. “I’m good now,” she breathed. “Go on and get what you need to from town. I’ll just hang out here with my tea.”

Jennifer looked worriedly at Ellie, but she really wasn’t in any condition to travel. “Okay, how about I run to town. Abelas, you can stay here and watch over her while I get us some supplies.” She looked over at the car that was in the driveway, her sister’s hot pink purse on the ground. Maybe their bank card was in there. She knew they had a bit of money saved up from over the years. “I’ll get you guys some warm clothes, the baby gets diapers and I’ll find all the food I can carry. And medicine! I’ll get you medicine, though what I’ve made you is far better than that shit.”

“I think I’d take anything you gave me at this point,” Ellie said. She downed the rest of her tea, then laid back down and tugged the pelts and blankets tighter around her shoulder. She thought about asking Abelas to lay down with her, but now she almost felt awkward about it. That, and add in the fact that they were in such a strange new place, she figured he probably would rather stay alert and keep an eye out. “Just hurry, Jennifer. I don’t want something to happen and for us to get separated.”

Abelas watched as the woman nodded, stopping to pick up a hideous pink thing from the ground before she told them to look after Olivia while she was gone before heading down the road. He blinked and looked into the tent, the little elven babe still fast asleep. The cat had even ventured over and curled up with it. He gave them a faint smile before he went over to Ellie, kneeling between her and the fire. “Do you need more of the tea? The scent reminds me of something the elders would brew during the winter months.”

“Maybe a little more,” she said with a shrug and offered her cup over to him as she sat up. It was an effort, trying to keep herself covered while she sat up and held out the cup at the same time, though perhaps if she didn’t feel on death’s door, she might have managed it better. She thanked him when he handed the cup back and she sipped at it, marveling in how it seemed to make her feel better already. “I should learn how to make this back home,” she murmured. “It’s working. I can feel it.”

He frowned as he watched her struggle to keep herself clothed and he took pity on her. “Here, da’len. You look as though you need help,” he said as he moved to sit down behind her, taking hold of the fur around her shoulders and carefully rewrapped her in it, ignoring her nakedness the best he could. “I am certain that if you ask, Jennifer will be more than happy to share the recipe with you,” he said as he drew her back against his chest, wrapping his arms around her.

Oh that made her heart flutter, to feel his strong arms around her, his chest against her back. She leaned back into him, sipping her tea. “It’s pretty good tea,” she said, looking down at the cup in her hands. She bit her lip and mentally scolded herself. Tea? Talking about the tea? Surely there was something more interesting she could make conversation about with him. She looked around, but all there was was the garden, the ocean, the burnt house, and the strange looking carriage. She supposed that was interesting enough and she nodded to it. “You ever see something like that?” she asked. “It’s just weird lookin’, isn’t it?”

Abelas looked over towards the strange thing sitting there on the rock road. “It is very odd. I’m not certain what it is. I suppose it faintly is reminiscent of a wagon, but I am not familiar with it. We will have to inquire to Jennifer when she returns from the village,” he said. 

Ellie supposed that maybe it wasn’t that interesting after all and just gave a nod. “I think the tea is making me sleepy,” she said softly as she leaned her head back against his shoulder, blinking her eyes slowly at the sky. She yawned and closed her eyes, feeling sleep pulling at her, and before she knew it, she was sound asleep.

She didn’t know how long she slept like that, but the next thing she did know, Abelas was gently shaking her awake and Jennifer was there, pulling clothing out of a strange bag. Ellie blinked and sat up straighter, reaching out to accept the clothes. They were odd looking, the breeches made of a thick blue material, the shirt brightly colored and seemed to be of a soft wool. “Maker’s breath, thank you,” she said as she looked over the stack in her hands. “The people in town didn’t bother you, did they?”

Jennifer shook her head as she passed a pair of thick socks to Ellie, followed by a pair of hiking boots. “I wasn’t too sure on your size, but I stuck to the smaller side for you. I hope they fit. And as for you, long legs, I did the best I could,” she said and handed Abelas similar, but larger clothing. “Also got us all kinds of food. Non perishable stuff. Jerky, noodles. And a whole cocktail of medicine for you,” she said, placing everything out carefully. She looked behind her towards the town. “The people didn’t bother me, but I did get this really creepy, weird sense. Like something not good was watching me. Kind of when those demons attacked us in Skyhold.” 

“Well that’s not good,” Ellie muttered, waiting for Abelas to turn away before she shrugged off the pelts and began to dress. The clothes were warm and soft, and they felt extremely well made. “Oh, this is amazing,” she said as she pulled the sweater over her head and hugged her arms around herself. It was perhaps a bit too warm for the weather they were in, but she didn’t care. She still felt like she was freezing. “That tea you made me helped, too. Do we have enough herbs to take back with us? I wonder if we could save the seeds, plant some when we finally settle… wherever it is we end up.”

Abelas stared down at the strange clothing he was given before he looked back up to Jennifer as she told Ellie that they would raid her herb garden soon. He shook his head and turned from them as he undid his threadbare breeches and pulled on the strange blue material. “This world is peculiar,” he murmured before he pulled on the sweater, it was warm and soft. Almost too soft, but he knew it would serve them well when they returned to Thedas. The boots he pulled on next were a tad too big, but they would work. He’d rather them too big, than too tight on his feet. He was too used to going around barefoot. 

Ellie blinked over at Abelas in his strange clothes. The dark bluish-grey sweater suited him and made the paleness of his silvery hair stand out even more. She wasn’t sure what to think of it all. She watched as Jennifer began to pack away the bags in the tent, taking care not to disturb the baby. Ellie looked at Abelas again, her mouth going dry at the way the denim pants hugged his form. She had the sudden urge to reach out and slap his rear. But before she could act or even make a teasing comment, a familiar voice rang out, snapping her out of her thoughts.

“Jennifer?!”

Her heart thudded hard in her chest, tears springing to her eyes as she whipped her head around to see Solas standing over by the road coming from town. Bull, Dorian and Krem right behind him. “Solas!” she cried, turning and running towards him, “Thank the Goddess that you…” She stopped dead in her tracks as suddenly she found herself back in Thedas, staring at a cold river with snow encrusted banks. “GODDAMN THIS WORLD!” she cried out, sobbing as she fell to her knees. “SOLAS!” she screamed into the cold wind that wrapped around her, “Come back, Solas!”

“What the fuck?” Ellie breathed in shock, finding themselves suddenly back inside the cave. She gave a violent shiver in the much colder air and looked around quickly. She heaved a sigh to see the tent with baby Olivia there with them. That would’ve been horrible to be separated from the little one. Her heart wrenched to hear Jennifer scream like that, the agony she could hear in her voice. Ellie pushed herself to her feet, wavering slightly. “We have to get away from here,” she said. “There’s something not right about this cave. None of this is right. That… that was really him though, wasn’t it?”

Jennifer nodded her head, numbly staring at the spot where she had seen him. So close. Almost close enough to touch and he was gone. Still back in that world. “Damn it all! He’s back there, isn’t he?! I have to find him! I have to find a way to find him!” She cursed again before she shivered in the cold and  pressed her lips together.

“Elowyn is right. We should not linger here. Whatever forces are at work, they are not stable. Magic that is not stable has the tendency to be extremely dangerous,” Abelas advised, looking to Ellie and then to the tent where the babe was, “We should find some place safer to plot our next move and allow time for the medicine to run its course.” 

Ellie nodded. “We should go now,” she said, seeing the first rays of light creeping over the horizon. “I can travel.” She looked to Abelas, who seemed as though he was getting ready to protest. “I can,” she said firmly. “We don’t know if that thing is going to happen again. What if we end up in a world that isn’t that one either? How many other worlds could there be?” She stopped and shook her head. “I don’t want to find out.”

Abelas frowned at the idea of being transported somewhere else without his consent. “And we won’t know where we end up or if we can get back at all.” He looked around and started packing up their belongings, giving Ellie a look, “Rest until we are ready to leave. I will not have you exerting yourself while your body heals you. Our priority now is to get as far away from this location as we can and then we will see if by some chance of luck if we can divine our next course of action.”

Ellie stood around, feeling useless as Abelas and Jennifer gathered up their things and packed them onto the horse. She could see the worry in Jennifer’s eyes, the fear, the disappointment. “Don’t worry. If he’s in your world right now, you know he’ll find a way back here. He has that way about him,” she said, then let Abelas help her up onto the horse. Even that much was exhausting at this point, but they needed to get away from here. “We’ll find him. Just as soon as we get a chance to stop again, we’ll figure out how to get you back to him. I promise.”


	15. Chapter 15

Solas ran forward, barely daring to believe his eyes. “Jennifer?!” he cried. His heart leapt when she turned, calling out his name in answer, but the next second, she vanished. “NO!” He skidded to a halt, his heart hammering in his chest, turning this way and that as if she would reappear. But she didn’t and his heart sank again. “Damn it,” he gasped out as his knees gave and he collapsed to the ground, his shoulders slumping. He’d been so close. 

He leaned over his knees, grabbing at his head with both hands, and let out an anguished growl. 

He didn’t know where they were or how they’d gotten there. He’d been walking down the street of the town they’d stopped in, accompanied by Bull, Dorian, and Krem, when they suddenly found their surroundings changed. He drew a deep breath and looked up through the tears swimming in his eyes. The landscape was slightly familiar and he realized it looked the same as when he would visit Jennifer’s grandmother in the Fade. Only now, the house he was accustomed to seeing was burnt to the ground.

“Is this her world?” he asked breathlessly, turning to look over his shoulder at Dorian. The implications of that were unsettling. He got to his feet and rounded on the other mage. “Are we truly here?”

Dorian nodded as he looked around, his lips pressing thin as his eyes drifted over the burned remains of the house. It was a damned shame that the townsfolk had done what they did. The other world held a special place in his heart as it had opened up something between Bull and himself. He looked back over his shoulder towards the little town. “It appears that we are, though how we have come to be here I am at a loss. The first time we were drawn here was rather ‘explosive’. Getting back home was no walk in the park either. But this? We seem to have just walked through the plane between the worlds. And what’s more disturbing is that I’m not sure the worlds are aligned properly. Displacement.”

Bull raised an eyebrow at Dorian. “Weird shit’s happening,” he clarified. He managed to stop himself from shivering at the sight of the burned house, but only just barely. That had been one of the more frightening experiences in his life. He snorted and shook his head. “Nearly died in there trying to save that damn cat,” he said in a low growl.

“This is more than a little unsettling,” Solas said, trying to rein in his emotions, to calm himself. But seeing Jennifer after so long had him all screwed up inside. He hadn’t seen his daughter, but perhaps Olivia was in the tent that vanished alongside Jennifer. He hoped she was. “The Veil is weakening,” he said, looking up at the sky. He could feel it. “Traveling between the two worlds has created a connection. And a tear. I wonder if others from our world have found themselves here. Or vice versa.”

Krem pressed his lips together as he ventured towards where they had seen the others not moments ago. His eyes scanned the ground and he crouched down next to where he had seen the fire pit, several herbs were on the ground in neat little piles. A little further away, he could see what looked to be odd colored paper and little buckets of something that said Ben & Jerry’s. “Quite likely. Looks like they were trying to gather these herbs here. Guess they weren’t expecting to be sent away so quickly.” He looked up towards the herb garden. “Maybe one of them is sick and she was trying to make up something.” 

Jennifer hadn’t appeared sick, and Abelas would have been immune. “Elowyn must be ill,” Solas said, a frown crossing his lips. If the healer was sick, that wasn’t good either. But that was the least of their problems. “We need to find a way back and then stop this from happening again,” he said to Dorian. He ran a hand down his face, feeling his stomach twisting into knots. He’d promised Jennifer he would not tear down the Veil, that he would not destroy the world of Thedas as it was now, but he feared there might be no other choice now. “I do not know the sort of damage that could result if we do not put a stop to this.”

Dorian nodded. “Coming here the first time was a matter of a tear in the Veil and red lyrium. I think we can all agree that if red lyrium is involved, it’s going to be dangerous. Who knows what will happen if the Veil is destroyed by the red lyrium in that violent manner? More chaos than any of us bargained for, I would be willing to bet. I think it would be best if we hurried up and found a way to take down the Veil before that happens. Best chaos to one world and not both. I don’t need two entire worlds on my shoulders if it fails,” he muttered, his stomach twisting into knots at the thought, “And I think I speak for all of us when I say we will want to be in our world when it comes down. We might get trapped here if we are not.”

“We will want to find our friends first. There is no telling how bad the destruction may be,” Solas said grimly. “Though I fear it may be worse if the connection between this world and ours is allowed to grow. I have heard many things about this world, and while fascinating it may be, it could prove devastating to our home.” Really, with the things Jennifer had told him of her world, what would happen should the two merge somehow? Certainly nothing good would come of it. The elves were mistreated enough as it was back in Thedas. He didn’t need to somehow add fuel to that fire. 

He exchanged a look with Dorian. They’d discussed this many times in their research on how to save Hawke from the Fade. Tearing down the Veil could destroy Thedas as it was known now, though it was almost a guaranteed way to save Varric’s friend. Solas had not shared with Dorian how it could be done, he felt that was tipping his hand a bit too much by sharing that information. But they both agreed on one thing. “The others will not agree to be part of it. We have discussed this before.”

The mage snorted, “I’ve done the math. They’ll think us crazy for even trying. No matter how safely we try to do it, some of the spirits and demons on the other side are not going to endure the shock of being suddenly thrust into a different world.” He pressed his lips thin as he shook his head. “It’s a right fine mess. One we will sit down and figure out together once we have gotten our merry little band back in one piece. We need more than our minds on this, Solas. Rushing this will only bring about more death and destruction of innocents.” 

“You are right,” Solas agreed, a plan already formulating in his mind. “Once we return to Thedas, I may set out on my own to find them. I can travel faster on my own. If you, Bull, and Krem stay in that town, I can bring the others back when I find them. We do not have time to waste. If the Veil keeps warping like this, the damage could be done before we have a chance to act. I will not let that happen.”

Krem exchanged a look with Bull before he looked at the two mages, “Not that it isn’t a great plan and all, but isn’t there a way you could spread the word that we are in the village rather than splitting up again?”

“I don’t like it either,” Bull said. “With the Inquisitor gone and Skyhold destroyed, I don’t know. The whole world feels like it’s going to shit. It’s dangerous out there now more than ever. I don’t like the idea of anyone going it alone. Shit, you saw what happened in the tavern!”

Solas had to turn away from them to roll his eyes. “I will consider my options before I do anything,” he said, though he nearly snorted at himself. He always was prone to acting before he thought things through. No, if he left and traveled in his wolf form, he could cover much more ground and find Jennifer that much faster. Especially now that the men he traveled with were relatively safe in a town. He could slip away in the night without them ever being the wiser. “But we can discuss all of this after we find our way back to Thedas.” He looked to Dorian again. “Any suggestions? I admit I am… not certain what our next steps should be.”

Dorian walked over towards the herb garden, motioning that Solas should follow him. “Best not talk about the icky demony stuff around those two. I wouldn’t want to give them nightmares. Or a reason to lynch me in the middle of the night.” He winked at Bull before he continued his pace towards the garden. The smell of the herbs was delightfully pungent in the warm sea air and he began gathering random herbs, placing them into the pack he wore. “I am not certain either. I gave Lindsey her spellbook back before Skyhold was attacked, otherwise, I would just spell us back to Thedas. As it is, we sort of just walked right into this world. It is like the barrier between them are like waves upon the sea.” He frowned at the thought, turning green at the analogy. “Oh my, I best think of something else.”

Solas sighed, trying to keep his patience with Dorian. “I am not certain I understand your comparison of the Veil to waves, but you do agree that something must be done? The more this happens, traveling between the two worlds, the weaker that barrier becomes. I don’t know how much longer it will hold. And I am afraid that at this moment in time, I only have more questions than answers.” He watched as Dorian gathered the herbs, then bent over to help. At least it gave his hands something to do. His lips pressed to a thin line as he replayed it over in his mind again, how close he’d been to Jennifer. A mirthless chuckle escaped him. “I admit, when I first heard of this world, how you got to spend time here and explore it, I was a bit jealous. I wanted to experience it for myself. Now that I am here, I have no desire to do so.”

“Understandable. Being so close to her, to your child only to have them pulled from your grasp with no way to follow? I cannot imagine,” Dorian said quietly before he stood once more, looking down at the elf as he picked the plants. “Solas, I didn’t mean the Veil between the Fade and Thedas. I meant the barrier between this world and Thedas. I am not certain they are the same thing. I think the red lyrium has done something to make it unstable, like you said and the Veil might be the catalyst that is holding it all together, if that makes sense? It’s almost like the red lyrium is punching holes through the Fade into this world. A tunnel or a bridge if you will. Because this world’s barrier is weak, it can punch right through. If we remove the Fade, there would be nothing to hold the two worlds together.” He shook his head and ran a hand through his hair. “Maker, it’s making my head hurt.”

The corner of Solas’ mouth twitched. “It is a complex situation,” he agreed as he stood up straight again. The herb garden calmed him, the scent reminded him of his vhenan. “Having that book might be just what we need to decide our next course of action. There is more knowledge in it than many other books I have ever consulted on such matters. It still baffles me that it came from a world where magic is nearly nonexistent. Still, whatever we decide to do, we cannot do it until we are certain that all of our friends are together and safe.” He felt guilty again, remembering how Jennifer disapproved of the idea of tearing down the Veil, even if they saved her loved ones. The innocents who would perish in the aftermath didn’t deserve it, she’d said. And what sort of a person would she be if all she cared about saving was her own people? “We will have to decide how to approach the others with this plan. I am sure some of them will protest that it is not the best course of action. I know Jennifer will.”

“Will she?” Dorian asked, the look in the man’s eye, the way he had a defeated slump to his shoulders on the matter. It reminded him of that time when he and Jennifer had a tiff between them, but that had been way before Varric even suggested rescuing Hawke. “You’ve proposed the idea to her before?” He was concerned. “But, why?”

Solas felt his spine stiffen. He hated that, hated it when he slipped and accidentally shared more than he meant to. He blamed it on the stress. “It was… a theoretical conversation,” he said, looking away from Dorian. His hand squeezed at the back of his own neck, wondering how to give Dorian enough information to satisfy his curiosity without revealing too much at the same time. “I had wondered if there was a way to restore the elves to their former glory, as it were. To give them their immortality back.” He paused and sighed. “It is a reaching idea, I know. As I said, it was theoretical. I hypothesized that doing so would destroy Thedas as we know it. She did not like the idea at all. That was the end of our conversation.”

Dorian recalled a conversation that they had before, a while ago, about freeing all the slaves of all the races if he were truly sorry for the actions of himself and his people. He studied the elf then, really studied him. He blamed Bull for his attention to the smaller details now. The way Solas seemed ashamed, the way he seemed to be steeling himself for a fight. Almost as if he were blaming himself for the way the elves were now, but that… that wasn’t possible, was it? “Solas, you know I consider you a friend, don’t you? And as a friend, I’d be willing to hear you out, even help you if you need it. Whatever it is that you’ve done, think you done, you don’t have to face it alone. Friends, loved ones, family, I’d like to think that we were all placed here to at least alleviate some of that heavy weight each of us carries.” He stepped forward, placing a hand on the elf’s shoulders, “Some more than others.”

Solas felt his throat constrict slightly. His eyes narrowed almost skeptically, but there was no lie in Dorian’s eyes. The other man really considered him a friend? He wasn’t certain how to react to that. He managed to arrange his expression to one of polite neutrality. “You have been spending too much time with Iron Bull,” he lightly accused. It unnerved him that Dorian could read him so easily now. But he tried very hard not to show that. “I appreciate that. Truly. There are not many in this world I would count as friends,” he said, carefully avoiding the subject at hand. It was bad enough that some of their circle already knew the truth. He still feared what the others would think, how they would react. They were all so important to Jennifer; he didn’t want to create a rift between her and them.

Dorian gave Solas a smile, squeezing his shoulder firmly before he patted him and let his hand drop away, instead holding it out for the herbs Solas held. “Just don’t forget it,” he said as he gave him a look before he nodded back towards the others. Bull had sprawled out underneath a tree, his arm propped up on his chest. “Come on, wouldn’t do for us all to get separated again.”

Solas was grateful that Dorian let the subject drop. It’d caught him completely off guard. And if Dorian had picked up enough to ask such questions, he could only imagine what the Iron Bull would think. Damn it all. His nose wrinkled as they approached Bull and Krem. “How can you lounge about at a time like this?”

Bull cracked open his eye to look up at the elf. “You got something better to do?” he asked. He smirked when Solas only glared. “That’s what I thought,” he said and closed his eye again, his good arm behind his head, the other lying across his chest. “I figure we’ll hang out here, see if anyone else comes or goes. Get a feel for what’s going on. Besides, we should enjoy this warm weather while we can. Dunno if you’ve noticed, but these Vents we travel with don’t care much for the cold.”

Krem rolled his eyes as Dorian moved to sit on Bull’s other side. “Yes, well we can’t all be giant furnaces like you, Chief. Or been getting second helpings from Lindsey’s cooking from the kitchens on most nights.” He gave an accusing look to the Qunari, “How is it you can be so warm anyway. Must be some kind of magic spelled on you.” He smirked.

The jab about second helpings wasn’t missed and Bull turned his head to scowl at Krem. “You callin’ me fat?” he growled. He snorted when Krem only grinned at him. He settled back in the grass again. “Sometimes I wonder why I put up with your crap.”

Solas rolled his eyes again, impatient with the both of them. Couldn’t they understand how serious the situation was? He began to pace, his eyes searching for any clue as to how to return to Thedas, to get back to Jennifer and Olivia. His mind was ablaze with questions and he longed for his books, for some way to search for the answers he so desperately needed in that moment. “Oh this is maddening,” he growled.

Dorian sighed as he could see the stress in all of their eyes. They were all feeling it, but he couldn’t imagine what Solas was going through. He was a good father, and being separated from such a young babe after such a traumatic experience, he didn’t want to think about it. “How about the two of you treat us to one of your legendary chess games?”

Solas sighed heavily through his nose, but turned and plopped himself down cross legged in the grass. This was ridiculous, wasting time just sitting around like this. But he didn’t see a way back to Thedas at the moment, perhaps the only thing left to do was to just wait around and see what happened. The idea irritated him more than he wanted to admit. He huffily crossed his arms over his chest. “Pawn to E-four.” 


	16. Chapter 16

“I am still not certain how I contributed to this idea,” Abelas said as he watched Jennifer busy herself about the new fire pit that they made once they had moved to a new location to camp, far from the blasted cave that had the red lyrium in it. She was determined in her actions as she made a tea, a different tea from what she had made for Ellie while she recovered from her sickness. He sat with Ellie in his arms, to keep her warm, of course. It had started snowing and it made the world cold, silent, a bit peaceful but a bit unsettling at the same time. 

“You said divine what to do from here,” she said as she stirred the pot, smiling at the water as it just started to boil and she moved the pot to set on a rock next to the fire so it wouldn’t boil too much. The tea had to be perfect. She added in the dried tea leaves she had made herself a while ago. “Reading tea leaves is my specialty.” Jennifer pulled a teacup from the plastic bag of groceries she had bought at the store while they had been in the real world. 

Ellie blinked slowly as she watched Jennifer work, wondering just how in the world someone could “read” tea leaves. Still, she’d heard about this and she was a little excited to see it. If she could keep herself awake long enough. She yawned again. “I think there was something in that syrup you made me drink,” she said. “It’s making me sleepy.” It was the most awful-tasting thing Ellie had ever had to drink. But it had stopped her coughing for the moment, so she tried not to complain too much. She leaned back into the warmth provided by Abelas and sighed contentedly. “What will the tea tell you?”

“Nyquil is supposed to make you sleep,” Jennifer said before she carefully ladled the tea into the cup, satisfied that she had gotten enough of the leaves in there as well. She sat down on the ground, crossing her legs as she looked down at the steaming cup. “Depends on the question I ask, which will be along the lines of where do we go next, how do I find Solas, that sort of thing. Hopefully it will let me see what might happen in the near future,” she said as she cleared her mind, focusing on her question as she took a sip of the tea, the hot liquid soothing her, but she still had a terrible anxiety. This had to work.

Ellie didn’t know what she expected to see. She leaned slightly forward, determined to stay sharply awake so she wouldn’t miss a thing. But nothing particularly spectacular happened. It was puzzling. She thought there would be… more. She deflated back against Abelas again and held out her hand, trying to summon her own magic. A few feeble sparks danced along her fingers before it vanished. Her hand dropped back to her lap. “Laaaaaame,” she muttered. Oh, she didn’t like the way this medicine made her feel. Sleepy and silly, almost as if she were a bit drunk, and she found her inhibitions lowered even more than usual. She snickered to herself and turned her face into Abelas’ neck, and playfully nibbled at his skin, just to see his reaction.

Abelas’s eyes went wide as he felt Ellie nipping at his neck. The sensation wasn’t entirely unwelcome, but unexpected. “I believe whatever medicine you have given her has made her rather… bold,” he muttered as he looked to Jennifer before he looked down at the woman in his arms. “You should sleep, you are acting silly, da’len,” he murmured into her ear as he rubbed at her back. She still had a fever and it worried him. Hopefully the medicine would help break that. 

Jennifer smiled to herself as she finished the cup and turned it upside down on her saucer for a minute, then righted it. “There was alcohol in the medicine, so I’m not surprised.” She looked over and couldn’t stop the warm feeling she felt at the sight of them both. “Should just give in, Abelas. You two make quite the cute couple,” she said and looked down at her cup, turning it so she could start reading.

Ellie giggled and leaned heavily against Abelas’ shoulder. “You’re no fun,” she muttered. What was wrong with her? That stupid medicine Jennifer gave her made her brain fuzzy. She wanted to tell Jennifer that he wouldn’t give in, that Abelas was too much of a stick in the mud, but she didn’t want to interrupt the concentration she could see on Jennifer’s face. That, and the fact that something in the back of her mind nagged at her that she wasn’t completely sure she wanted him to “give in.” Part of her still wondered if he was only being nice to her because she was sick. “I hope she sees something in that cup. I’m tired of wandering around out in the middle of nowhere,” she sighed.

Jennifer licked her lips as she read, but what she was seeing couldn’t be right and she looked over at the two elves. “Which way is East? Didn’t we come from the East? It’s back the way we came isn’t it?” she asked, looking over her shoulder in the direction, “I’m reading East and there’s something that looks like a shelter, a town maybe, but it’s backwards. Do you think it’s possible we missed Solas in passing?” Her stomach twisted in knots at the thought.

“I TOLD you all we should have stopped in that town,” Ellie said a little louder than she should have. She sat up straighter in Abelas’ lap, but had to pause and press the heel of her hand against her forehead. “That’s it. First thing tomorrow, we’re going straight there. And if he’s not there, we wait for him. There’s got to be an inn or a tavern or somewhere we can get rooms. I’m sick of sleeping on the ground.” She shouldn’t have been so snippy, she knew that, but knowing that they’d been so close to him and missed him left her feeling sour about the whole thing. “And if you’re still worried about us getting jumped or whatever, just use me as a shield. I’ll sneeze on any bastard that tries to attack us. That’ll stop ‘em.”

Abelas snorted at the thought and smiled at her. “Yes, that will surely stop them. We will not have to fear anyone now,” he said and brushed the strands of hair off of her forehead. “You need to lay down, you will need all the strength you can manage if we are to travel in the morning.” He looked back to Jennifer who seemed to have her brow furrowed at the cup in her hands, “Does something trouble you?”

Jennifer started and looked back over towards Abelas, giving him a smile. “No, not at all. You are right. Should rest up before we move out. I’ll take first watch. You both should sleep.”

Ellie’s eyes narrowed slightly at Jennifer. She suspected the woman was lying, that she’d seen something in the cup that she didn’t want to share, but she was too tired to argue the point at the moment. “C’mon,” she said and slapped a hand to Abelas’ leg. “I need you for body heat.” She got up, her legs feeling weak and heavy, and began to arrange their makeshift bed near the fire. She waited for him to lay down before she ungracefully flopped next to him and yanked the covers over them. “And what am I going to do once I’m well and don’t have an excuse to cuddle you anymore?”

Abelas gave her a look, raising his eyebrow at her as she tucked them in. He had to admit, he was getting used to having her warmth against him. What did that mean? Was he becoming soft? Becoming one of them? He was even starting to possibly care for her, more than what his duty would ask of him. “I remember a time when you would have rather strangled me than have to have shared space. Still, I imagine I will find some excuse for you to ‘cuddle.’ It is rather cold, isn’t it?”

“Maybe I still want to strangle you and this medicine is just making me loopy,” she countered. “For all you know, I’m just luring you into a false sense of security.” She rolled so her back was to his chest and wiggled back against him, pulling his arm over her as if it were another blanket. “Mmhmm. That’s the plan,” she yawned. “Make you lower your guard, feel safe, and when you least expect it - BAM! Pillow to the face. You know, when we have decent pillows again.”

Abelas wasn’t sure why, but her silly attitude was contagious and he leaned his head down, murmuring against her ear, “Such a waste. I can think of a few more things to do in a decent bed than assaulting me with pillows.” He ignored the look that Jennifer cast over her shoulder at them. He was curious as well about what she had seen in the cup. He had heard of reading tea leaves, but he was curious as to how accurate they were. Some people could claim to do many things, but he had not often seen promising results. 

Ellie’s eyes went wide and a thrill shot up her spine. Had Abelas really just said that? Grumpy, distant Abelas? It left her nearly speechless. She turned in his arms, blinking at him, her mouth working like a fish out of water. She slapped at his shoulder. “Now you’re just screwing with my head,” she growled. “Shame on you. Putting ideas in my mind when I’m all drugged up on that wacky syrup shit she fed me. I thought you were a man of honor, Abelas.” She didn’t know what to do with him, and she wondered if he’d gotten into the cough syrup as well. She found she rather liked the thoughts dancing through her mind, but surely he was joking.

“Ah, forgive me. Your ways seem to have been rubbing off on me. I shall attempt to make myself back into the ‘old grump’ you were so fond of before,” he murmured, “Or perhaps you should stay ill. You are far more agreeable and somewhat adorable when all you wish to make of life is to cuddle with everything and everyone.” 

“Not  _ everything , _ ” she corrected him. “I haven’t tried to cuddle the dragon. ….Yet.” She glanced over her shoulder at the lizard, which had crawled out of the fire and up onto Jennifer’s shoulder. She shook her head at it and looked at Abelas again. “I’m just waiting for you to turn all grumpy again. It’s inevitable. You’re just being nice because I’m sick,” she muttered, tucking her head against his chest. At least, that was what she suspected and saying it in a joking way would at least lessen the blow if he admitted it was true.

He smiled faintly. “Perhaps I am just happy to make the best out of a bad situation. It is good to have purpose again. I am not used to be waited on hand and foot. It is good to protect, to be needed once more. It is a new duty and I am finding that it is not as bleak a future as I once thought it was going to be for me. Thank you, for what it’s worth, for putting up with myself. I know it wasn’t easy. I hope you will allow me to make this up to you. I owe you my life, after all.”

“Happy to be of service,” she deadpanned and rolled over to face away from him once more. An unexpected pain lanced through her chest and she swallowed hard. So it was just the situation he was happy with, not her. She rolled her eyes and mentally scolded herself for… whatever it was she’d been feeling. It was stupid to think that there was something there. They’d practically hated each other before she’d fallen ill. Her being sick shouldn’t have changed anything. She wanted to kick herself. A huff escaped her and she hugged her arms around herself, trying to discreetly scoot a little away from him. _‘_ _ Stupid.’ _

He blinked at her tone and the sudden way she suddenly rolled away from him. He frowned and pushed himself up onto one elbow and reached to pull on her shoulder, rolling her towards him again. He tilted his head at her when he caught her eye. “Da’len, what was that? I said something wrong, didn’t I? I am still trying to wrap my mind around how to act to you. I have been around others like me for a thousand years. None as refreshing as a presence as you. I fear some of my words and actions might be a bit outdated.”

“You’re fine, Abelas,” she said, though her tone was a bit cold. She didn’t quite meet his eyes as she spoke. It was silly of her to feel anything towards him, she knew that, and yet hearing him basically speak her worries out loud still made her heart ache. She realized then that she’d let herself start to care too much for him. “I’m tired and sick. It’s making me grumpy.” She gave a mirthless snort of laughter. “I guess it’s my turn to be all pissy now, huh? Just… let’s just go to sleep.” She bit her lips together and squeezed her eyes shut, wishing sleep would claim her quickly, though she knew that was unlikely now.

He reached out, letting his fingers brush against her chin, lifting her face towards him. He had hurt her feelings somehow and he could see the tears clinging to her lashes. He thought over his words carefully and realized how flippant they could have been interpreted as. He was a fool. He sighed out and leaned his forehead down against her feverish one as he studied her closed eyes. “I am happy for the situation, to be able to repay what good deeds have been done to me, but you, da’len, make the situation mean so much more than I ever could have dared to dream.”

She swallowed harshly. She didn’t know if she wanted to hug him or slap him. “You make my head hurt,” she murmured softly. Why did she feel like crying? She wanted to blame it on the illness, the medicine, the confusing sentinel who had somehow wormed his way into her heart. It was all too confusing and she couldn’t form a coherent thought if her life had depended on it. She scooted closer to him and nuzzled into his chest. “I hatechu.”

Abelas chuckled and leaned his head down on top of hers, pressing a kiss to her crown. “I get that a lot,” he said. 

Jennifer watched as they both fell asleep. It was like she wasn’t even there, but she smiled as she watched. It was good. They needed to clear the air between them. She sighed and looked back down at the teacup. She frowned again at the rather confusing blotch that was in the future. Not immediate, but definitely within the year. She wasn’t entirely certain what the Goddess was trying to tell her. Change, a big change. Uncertainty, but with a unity and acceptance. What could it mean? She sighed and looked up at the dark sky. “Solas,” she whispered, “What are you planning?”


	17. Chapter 17

Lindsey sat on the ground, trying to coax a fire to life. The wood was damp and didn’t want to catch. She watched Cassandra as she paced back and forth along the river, walking almost out of eyesight before she would turn and go back the other way, calling out Varric’s name. “Ugh, she’s so stubborn,” she muttered, trying even harder to get the wood to catch fire. She snorted at herself. “Way to go, dumbass. You have the opportunity to go back to your world, go to the grocery store, and you didn’t even think to buy a goddamn cigarette lighter,” she scolded herself. She worked the pieces of wood back and forth faster, trying to spark a coal. “Fuck it!” she cried and threw them down.

Cassandra turned as she heard Lindsey’s angry shout. Everyone’s patience with each other seemed to be running rather thin the last few days. She cringed when she heard Lindsey call her name and with a huff, she turned and walked back down the bank, though she scanned the other shore for any sign of Varric. “What?” she asked, her tone impatient.

Lindsey pushed herself to her feet, kicking the damp pieces of firewood in her frustration. “I can’t do this anymore!” She looked to the Seeker, not wanting to get into an argument, but… well, that was a lie. She was so frustrated with the whole situation that part of her did feel like picking a fight. But not without reason. “We can’t keep doing this! I know you don’t want to give up, but Varric wouldn’t want you to keep torturing yourself like this. You have to let it go.”

“Let it go?” Cassandra asked in a dangerous tone, her eyes narrowing. The very idea was preposterous to her. “I. Will. NOT.” She was half-tempted to slap her. “How can you even suggest such a thing? Varric is out there somewhere! I will not stop until I find him! I cannot. Not until I know he is safe and we are together again. I thought you were his friend. How can you just give up on him?”

“Because he wouldn’t ask this of us!” Lindsey answered. “Varric is one of the most selfless people I know. He wouldn’t want me or Cullen or especially you to be out here, hungry and half-frozen while we look for him. And even if he was still alive, do you really think he’d still be out here by the river? He hates nature! He’d beeline it to a town and hope you’d think to do the same.”

Only one word stuck out in all of that to Cassandra. “If? IF?!” she asked, taking a step forward, her hands shaking as she balled them into fists at her sides. “There is no IF! Just before he fell, he said he would see me later. And I still believe that! I will not abandon him when he needs me the most! He’s probably hurt, alone-”

“VARRIC’S DEAD!” Lindsey stopped, blinking at the angry tears in her eyes as she swallowed and took a step back from her friend. She hadn’t meant to bellow it out like that, but there it was. “I don’t like it either, he was my friend and I know it hurts. I can’t imagine how much you must hurt right now. But living in denial and risking all our lives isn’t what he would want for you!”

Cassandra’s jaw clenched; Lindsey might as well have slapped her. “You’re wrong,” she said. She looked over Lindsey’s shoulder and saw Cullen standing there watching them, a couple of rabbits in his hands from his hunt. “And you?” she demanded. “Is that what you believe as well? That Varric is dead?”

Shit. He had frozen when he walked back into camp and seen the two of them shouting at each other. He was just happy he had caught the game before they started it up. He swallowed now as the two pairs of angry eyes turned towards him and fixated. The woman who would be his future wife and a woman who could kick his ass. He was screwed either way. Honesty it was then.

He sighed and set the rabbits down by the fire as he stood up straighter and went to stand next to Lindsey. “Cassandra, I am sorry, but I have to agree with Lindsey on this. If it had been reversed, if she had fallen instead of Varric, I know that I would be out here, working myself to death trying to find her. To prove that she was still alive, but when we are this close to someone, you can’t trust yourself to be thinking clearly. Varric is gone. I am so sorry for that, Cassandra. I am. We need to make certain that his sacrifice wasn’t in vain. We have to keep living on. It’s what he would want.”

Cassandra couldn’t believe what she was hearing. “So that’s it? Just… oh well, we tried? If either of you were out there, Varric would keep searching! He would and you know it! He wouldn’t just walk away from you.” Her throat felt tighter and tighter with every word and she choked on a sob. She set her jaw and held back her tears; she didn’t believe it. “What would you have me do? Just move on with my life, pretend to be happy…” She felt ill even as the sarcastic words left her mouth. She shook her head adamantly. “NO! I will not stop searching for him, even if it kills me!”

Cullen exchanged a look with Lindsey before he stepped forward, placing his hands on Cassandra’s shoulders. “You know he wouldn’t want that. He blamed himself for so much, the deaths caused by the red lyrium, you know he wouldn’t want to add you to that number. You don’t have to pretend to be happy. You shouldn’t be happy about this. None of us are. Our good  friend, your love is dead. We need to mourn for him properly. Remember him how he would want us to. We have to take care of ourselves.” 

Cassandra knew she shouldn’t have done it, but she was so upset that she couldn’t stop herself. She shoved him. Hard. “You go take care of yourself then!” she cried as he stumbled backwards, nearly falling from the force of her push. “Go! I do not need your help.” She stepped around him and stormed off, not knowing where she was going, but she had to get away from them in that moment or she was going to do something she really regretted.

“Cassandra!” Lindsey cried, looking in shock at the Seeker as she hurried over to Cullen’s side. Part of her wanted to let Cassandra go, but a voice in the back of her mind said she’d never forgive herself if something happened to her. “Cullen, are you alright?” she asked, looking him over. “Jeezus. What… what do we do? We can’t leave her out here on her own.”

Cullen cursed under his breath as he steadied himself on his feet and he looked after Cassandra as she stomped off. “No, we can’t. She’s not safe out here, especially when she’ isn’t thinking clearly. We’ll have to go after her. She’s going to kill me, you know. I’ll have to grab her and we’ll head for the nearest town.” He looked at his love and leaned his head against hers, “Are you okay to travel just a bit further, darling?”

Lindsey nodded. “I am. Let’s hurry before we lose her,” she said. She pressed a quick kiss to his lips before she grabbed up the puppy and shoved it inside her coat, then grabbed the horse’s lead. Guilt began to creep into her chest as they walked, able to see Cassandra up ahead. “I shouldn’t have snapped at her like that,” she said, looking down at her shoes. “I’m just… tired.” It sounded lame, but she didn’t know how else to put it in words. “I didn’t mean for everything to blow out of proportion like this.”

“I think it was heading this way anyhow,” he said quietly to her, “This needed to happen. It’s a turning point, I’m sorry to say, but we have been out here for nearly two weeks with no sign of Varric. I would love to be proven wrong, but the hope that Varric is alive grows dimmer each passing day.” He looked ahead, watching as Cassandra shoved tree branches out of her way. He cursed under his breath, “She’s going to maim me for this,” and he hurried to catch up with her.

Cassandra turned abruptly on her heel and drew her fist back as Cullen hurried up to her. “Leave me!” She’d never fought with Cullen like this before, she didn’t like it, but she was too upset with him and Lindsey to care much in that moment. “If you have given up hope, then I do not want you here!” She took a step back, her fist still raised. “I will find him on my own. Now GO.”

Cullen hesitated a moment, his lips pulling a frown before he stepped forward, his hands up defensively. “We can’t leave you out here!” he protested, ducking as she threw a punch at him. It was easy to out maneuver as she was letting anger control her actions rather than sense. “How can you expect to survive out here when you can’t even get your head into the right state of mind! You are running on fumes and anger. We are going to the nearest town and Maker help me, you are coming with us.” He swallowed and focused his eyes on hers. “Even if I have to knock you out.”

A mixed expression of shock and anger crossed her face. “I’d like to see you try,” she said, her tone dangerous. Would he really try it? That didn’t seem like him, but then again, she wouldn’t put it passed him to do anything he thought necessary to protect his friends. Even if that meant knocking her down for what he saw as her own good. She decided to gamble. She lowered her fist and held her hands out from her sides. “Go ahead. Do it,” she challenged. “Free shot to knock me out.” She narrowed her eyes slightly, daring him to make good on his threat.

“Cassandra, don’t make me do this,” he tried to plead with her. He didn’t want to raise a hand against a woman who wasn’t even going to try to defend herself. Unless she was and she wanted to see if he had the balls to follow through with his threat. He licked his lips. He didn’t have to knock her out, just get under her and onto his shoulder so he could carry her off. “Fine. You’ve left me no choice!” he said as he lunged forward, trying to act like he was going to swing a punch but ducked, trying to shoulder her and knock the wind out from her chest.

“Oof!” she cried as his shoulder slammed into her midsection, nearly knocking the breath from her. “Cullen!” she gasped in outrage as he stood up straight, lifting her off her feet. “HOW DARE YOU!” She slapped at the back of his head and he cringed, but didn’t release her. If he thought he was going to get away with this, he was sadly mistaken. She drew her leg back and slammed her knee into him, doubling him over enough that she was able to slip from his arms. As soon as she caught her footing, she turned and ran. Enough was enough.

“Cassandra!” Lindsey called and ran after her, dropping the reins of the horse. “Goddammit, Cassandra, stop!” 

Cassandra suddenly cried out and fell, landing hard on her right side. Lindsey skidded to a stop at the same moment, her eyes wide with horror at the sight of a bolt protruding from Cassandra’s thigh. What the…

“Well, well, well, Anya. Looks like this thing is more accurate than we thought,” came a gruff voice as a man stepped into view, lazily resting a crossbow on his shoulder. A grin spread across his lips as he approached Cassandra, who struggled to get back up. 

“Who are you?” she demanded, gripping her thigh with both hands. The crossbow bolt had pierced her leg through, the fletchings sticking out of one side and the tip protruding from the other. “Shit,” she hissed under her breath. She narrowed her eyes at him, but gasped the next second. Bianca! “Where did you get that crossbow?” she demanded. “Tell me now!”

Bryce continued to grin as he looked at the crossbow on his shoulder. “What, this?” he asked, turning to glance at the woman who accompanied him. “We got this off some mouthy-ass dwarf, didn’t we? Would’a let him go if he hadn’t been shooting his mouth off about poison in the food he carried. Dumb sonuvabitch is dead now.” Movement out of the corner of his eye caught his attention and he swung around to aim the crossbow at Cullen and Lindsey. “Looks like a three-for-one special today! Now get over here and I won’t put a bolt in your eye.”

Cullen’s eyes widened and he moved in front of Lindsey. He felt horrible, afraid and fearless in the same moment. Afraid that they might kill his love and child, but fearless that he would do anything to keep them safe and horrible to hear that these bandits had taken Varric’s crossbow from him. If they had moved faster, would the dwarf still be alive? He grit his teeth. “There’s no need for violence. You can have what coin we carry, but we haven’t much else.”

“Oh looks like you’ve got more than enough,” Bryce replied coolly. He jerked his head over towards Cassandra. “I think your friend there might need a little help walking back to our camp. Drop whatever weapons you have and get moving. And don’t try anything funny.” He kept the crossbow trained on Cullen as he spoke over his shoulder, “Anya, grab that horse. This may be one of the better hauls we’ve had yet.”

Cassandra’s leg felt like it was on fire, but she grit her teeth and tried not to show too much pain in her expression. Though the true pain was in her heart. If this bandit had Bianca, then she was certain that Cullen had been right all along. Varric was dead. There was no way he’d ever give up that crossbow. She squeezed her eyes shut as she pulled her sword and dropped it aside as the bandit commanded. “I am such a fool,” she whispered to herself, feeling impossibly guilty for dragging Cullen and Lindsey into this.

Cullen pulled his own sword and dropped it next to Cassandra’s before he moved to help her sling her arm over his shoulders. He felt so horrible for having insisted that Varric couldn’t have survived the fall. He had, apparently, and only to be robbed by bandits and killed. “Cass…” he breathed as he helped her up, “I am so sorry. We should have listened to you.”

“No,” she answered, putting her weight on her other leg as Lindsey hurried over to them. “I should have listened to you. I have dragged you up and down that riverbank searching for a ghost.” She had to swallow harshly, to push her emotions down. Now was not the time to break down and lose it. She would mourn Varric later, once they’d figured a way out of this mess. It was almost frightening how numb she could make herself inside when she had to. “We’ll find a way out of this,” she whispered to them.

“Follow her,” Bryce commanded as Anya walked ahead of them, leading the horse. He fell into step behind them, never lowering the crossbow. “It’s too bad we didn’t find you sooner. We just finished a big meal. We would’ve shared with you. Though you lot don’t look like you’re too hungry, are you? There might be a few bites left over we can spare.”

“I’m not eating anything they offer,” Lindsey muttered under her breath as she pulled Cassandra’s other arm around her shoulders. She cast a worried look at the bolt in her leg, cringing as she imagined how that had to hurt. She wanted to pull it out, but remembered that it was best to leave it in until it could be treated. But where the hell would they take her? It wasn’t like there was an emergency room nearby. “It’s going to be okay. I’m sorry about earlier.”

“Don’t worry about it,” Cassandra answered, but bit her lips together as Bryce barked at them to shut up. Luckily they didn’t have far to go before they reached the camp, set up in the middle of an open field, the far edges of it lined by trees. “What… what is that smell?” she asked, sniffing at the air. It smelled like meat that had been roasting slightly too long. She couldn’t decide if she liked the smell of it or not.

Cullen’s eyes went to the fires that they had going and he nearly recoiled in horror as he saw the human body parts roasting over them. Some of them were burnt to a crisp, charred a deep dark black before catching fire. Others were in various states of cooking. “By Andraste, what have you done?!” he demanded, fearful for his child, his love, Cassandra, and himself. “You’ve gone mad!” he exclaimed and at the same time, his eyes caught the red glint of the lyrium, “You need help.” 

Anya tied up the horse and turned to face Cullen. “Aw, what’s wrong? Not hungry? Don’t you want a taste?” she teased, tipping her head as she looked at him. “Oh well. More for us. Especially once we decide to butcher you lot up. I wonder if you’ll taste as good as the dwarf we ate a couple nights ago.”

“You BITCH,” Cassandra spat and tried to wiggle out from between Lindsey and Cullen. “I’ll kill you!” She froze when she felt the crossbow pressed to the back of her head.

“Now just calm down,” Bryce said in a smooth voice. “Nobody’s killin’ anyone. Not tonight, anyways. You three just set yourselves down by that fire. Like I said, we all just ate a big meal. There’s no need to kill you now.” He kept the crossbow trained on them until they did as he said. “Especially if you’ve got supplies with you. We only do what we have to to survive.”

Cassandra felt a bit dizzy as she sat down. The leg of her pants had large bloodstains on either side, and she knew that her wound needed to be treated soon. “Maker damn them all,” she growled, tears brimming in her eyes. “I should have pushed harder. If I’d found him before…” Her voice cracked and she bowed her head, the tears threatening to fall.

Cullen’s eyes brimmed with tears and he pulled Lindsey close on one side and Cassandra on the other. “Hush, no need to worry about what we should have done. What we need to do is trust each other now. We need to get that bolt out of your leg, Cassandra, before you bleed dry.” He didn’t know what else to do but to give in to their kidnapper’s wishes for the moment. He would die before he let them harm her, he swore it.

“She’ll bleed more if we pull it out,” Lindsey said, her stomach churning at the smells around them, the sight of human bones on the ground near the firepits. “I doubt they’ll let us bandage her up. We just need to… to wait for help or figure out a way out of here.” She was terrified. This was like one of her worst nightmares come true and she prayed that if she ended up as dinner for these cannibals that they would at least have the decency to kill her before chopping her up. She shuddered. “Makes me think of those god-awful horror movies Jen used to make me watch with her.” The corner of her mouth twitched downwards and a lump formed in her throat. She really missed her sister.

Cullen frowned as he brushed the hair from Cassandra’s face before he looked to Lindsey. “I’m not certain I want to know what you speak of,” he said before he looked back to Cassandra. Why couldn’t Elowyn have been with them when they departed? She could have fixed this easily.

“You don’t. You really don’t,” Lindsey answered, frowning as she looked over at Cassandra. This was bad. With Cassandra hurt, and all of them unarmed, she didn’t know how in the world they were going to get themselves out of this mess. 


	18. Chapter 18

Solas crept down the stairs of the tavern, his eyes scanning for any sight of his companions. He knew that if he told them what he was planning, they would insist on joining him. After spending far too much time in the other world, all of them uncertain on how to return to Thedas, they’d suddenly found themselves back in the middle of the little town. It was beyond unnerving and he was determined to find Jennifer before it happened again.

Krem was still upstairs, but he wasn’t sure where Iron Bull and Dorian were. They could’ve been up in their rented room still or they could have been at dinner. If it was the latter, he was certain to be spotted if he wasn’t careful. It was ridiculous of course, they couldn’t have really stopped him if they tried, but he’d prefer to avoid the confrontation. 

Once outside of the town, he would be able to transform and cover much more ground than if they accompanied him. He could go to the nearest eluvian, and begin his real search from there. That was the starting point. 

He breathed a sigh of relief when he saw that neither Bull nor Dorian were in the tavern. He turned hurriedly towards the door and yanked it open, preparing to slip out into the last light of day, when he almost walked smack into her. 

“Jennifer!” he cried in complete surprise. There she was, looking road-weary and dirty, holding their daughter in her arms, but he thought he’d never seen a more beautiful sight in his life. He grabbed her up and crushed his lips to hers, leaning carefully over the baby in her arms. He felt happy tears burned beneath his closed eyes and he had to swallow before he pulled back to look at her. “I’ve been trying to get to you, to find you. I…” He trailed off, feeling breathless and elated, his hands shaking on her shoulders. “I was so afraid I’d never see you again,” he whispered.

“Solas!” Jennifer cried, reaching up to cup his cheek in her hand while she leaned their foreheads together, “Oh ma lath.” She was shaking so bad, they had been traveling for a while and she was exhausted but being back in his arms made everything she had endured worth it. “When you disappeared, I thought I was going to lose myself. I made tea and read the leaves, they told us to come here. Thank the gods,” she breathed, smiling at him before looking down at the baby in her arms, “She really missed you.”

He gave a watery laugh and looked down at his daughter, his heart swelling to near the breaking point, and he carefully took her into his arms. “Ar lath ma, da’len,” he whispered and pressed a kiss to the baby’s forehead. “Come inside where it’s warm,” he said and stepped back to allow Jennifer into the tavern. He was pleased to see Abelas and Ellie with her as well, and he gave a nod to both of them. “Let’s sit near the fire so you can warm up,” he suggested and led the way to the table closest to the fireplace. “It is lucky you had such insight, vhenan. I was just preparing to leave this place. I’d hoped to find you on my own.”

She gave him a travel weary smile as she followed him over to the table, letting him take the babe as she sat down next to him. “I saw that you might leave and there was a small window for us to catch you.” She looked over at Ellie and Abelas. “The healer has been sick for a few days, I think the inn will be good for her to heal up.” She smiled as the sentinel helped Ellie to sit. “Some hot food will do wonders. Curling up with the dragon might also be another way to warm her up, but I think the cat has claimed his side, when he’s not in the fire pit.”

“The what?” Solas asked, looking down at the floor as a scratching sound drew his attention. His eyes went wide and he nearly jumped out of his chair as the tiny dragon looked up at him and belched a little ball of fire into the air. “Vhenan,” he said in a slow voice, his eyes following the dragon as it climbed up her chair to perch on her shoulder. “No. No, you cannot keep a pet dragon. Where in the world did you find one to begin with?”

Abelas chuckled as he sat next to Ellie, making certain that she was nestled comfortably against his side. She needed hot food and rest, more of that medicine too. “We found a dragon’s nest while we were searching for you, lethallin. It was the only egg that was not smashed in the den. The mature dragons appeared to have been slain by very powerful foes,” he said, raising an eyebrow at Solas, “Your lath was very adamant about keeping that little one with us. It has become like a shadow to her.”

Solas dragged a hand down his face as he thought back to the fight with the dragons. “I am not so sure about powerful foes slaying that dragon. More like four men desperate to not be eaten alive,” he said, then paused and corrected himself, “Three men desperate to not be eaten, and a Qunari that cannot turn down a fight with a dragon to save his soul.” He sighed heavily through his nose as he looked at the dragon on Jennifer’s shoulder. This would not end well. “I can understand your affection for it now, Vhenan, but dragons cannot be tamed. It will prove too dangerous to keep as it gets bigger.”

Jennifer only grinned as she patted the chair next to her, smiling as the little lizard scurried down her arm to curl up onto the seat before she sighed and leaned against Solas, letting her arm curl around his waist as she peered down at the babe in his arms. She looked so perfect in her father’s hold. “I was so worried that we wouldn’t find each other. When the mirror crumbled and you didn’t come back… I feared the worst.”

Ohhh, she was good. Distracting him from the topic at hand. And though he knew what she was doing, he fell for it anyway. “As did I,” he admitted. With her head on his shoulder and Olivia in his arms, he found he could breathe a little easier, like a literal weight had been lifted from his shoulders. He felt whole again, and the realization of that made him smile. “I feared I would not get to you in time when I saw the broken eluvian at Skyhold. I worried about where you were, if you were safe.” He turned to look at her. “I am never leaving your side again.”

Ableas smiled at the two and looked to Ellie at his side; she was sleeping again. He felt like he was intruding upon a moment between the two and he wondered if he should give them some time alone. “We have had a long journey, I am certain Jennifer will tell you about it. It was not an easy one. I would like to see what this place has for a stew, Elowyn should have something substantial before she retires. Now that we are here, her illness should begin to dwindle.”

Ellie blinked awake as Abelas spoke. “I didn’t mean to doze off,” she said, her voice thick, and she yawned. The tavern was so warm and dry, and she felt safer here than she had since they left Skyhold, that it was easy to just fall asleep leaning against Abelas. A sleepy smile spread across her lips as he got up to get her something to eat and she watched Jennifer and Solas together. “I’m so happy you found him,” she said, leaning forward to rest her head on her arms. “I thought we were going to be wandering around out there in the middle of nowhere forever.”

Jennifer smiled over at Ellie, letting her hand rest on Solas’s arm, drawing her thumb over the softness of his tunic. “I’m afraid I picked up some medicine from my world for her while we were over there. It’s made her a bit loopy and a little drunk, I think.” She looked up as Abelas came back over to them balancing three bowls in his hands and set them on the table. 

“Da’len, sit up straight for a moment. You need to eat before we get you to bed. I believe you said something about smothering me with a pillow?” he teased.

“Nnngh,” she groaned and forced herself to sit up the the chair. “I did. But you have brought me food and I am exhausted. You shall live another night,” she muttered and grabbed up the spoon, not even bothering to let the soup cool before she swallowed it down. It seared her mouth and throat, but she shrugged and continued to eat. Not like she could taste much at the moment anyway. She yawned and spooned up another big bite. “I’ll kill you tomorrow.”

Solas snorted in amusement, unsure of what he was witnessing between the sentinel and the healer. Things between the two of them had always been antagonistic, but now there was a playfulness and an affection there that anyone could see. He leaned over closer to Jennifer as she ate her own bowl of stew. “You wouldn’t have anything to do with this, would you, Vhenan?”

Jennifer only smiled and turned her head so she could kiss his cheek before she picked up her own spoon and started eating. “Believe it or not, they’ve gotten to this point on their own. Abelas did good protecting us, it brought out a better side in him than what we saw at Skyhold. It was good for him to have something, someone to protect. It takes a special person to bring out the best in us.” She gave the elf a wink, reaching down to squeeze his knee. “Thank the Goddess. I was going crazy without you.”

“And I you,” Solas answered, pressing a kiss to her forehead. “I have never had so much trouble sleeping before. I know I will sleep well tonight knowing you are safe.” He glanced over at the bar, a thought dawning on him. “I should make arrangements for more rooms. I don’t think Krem would appreciate sharing a room with us tonight,” he said and stood up. “Finish your meal. Then you can soak in a hot bath and we will rest.”

Ellie perked up a bit at that. “Hot bath? Did he say a hot bath? I want one too!” she called after him, sighing dreamily as he gave her a nod. A grin spread across her lips, though it was slightly ruined by the exhausted look in her eyes. “Finally be able to chase away this cold in my bones. It’s like I can still feel it,” she said and shivered violently. “You all may have to pry me out of the tub. I could soak in hot water for DAYS.”

Abelas chuckled. “I would not doubt it with how stubborn you are. I shall just wait for you to fall asleep then, before I pry you out of the water. Or wait for it to grow cold. Then you will come out willingly.” He looked over to Jennifer as she finished her bowl and pushed it away. “I am certain that we all will sleep better tonight. Anything is better than a red lyrium infested cave.” 

Ellie nodded her agreement as Solas returned to the table and passed a key to Abelas for their room. She lifted her bowl to her lips and drank the rest down. “Oh Maker, so good,” she moaned and smacked her lips as she set the bowl back on the table. She sat back in her chair and leaned her head back, her eyes feeling heavy. “I can’t wait to get cleaned up and sleep in a bed.” Before she fell asleep in the chair, she forced herself to stand up and looked expectantly at Abelas. “Let’s go find this room before I pass out.”

He stood with her, slipping an arm around her shoulders, not liking the way she waivered on her feet. “Ma nuvenin, da’len,” he said before he stooped a little to pick her up in his arms. “Best I carry you, lest you fall down the stairs and injure yourself,” he chuckled as he only wobbled slightly as he took a step, “That is if my leg will permit me to walk without injuring us both.”

She gave a soft groan and laid her head on his shoulder. “Well we’re a pair, aren’t we? Me sick as a dog and you still not having full use of your leg. If you fall and drop me down the stairs, that negates any promise I made of not smothering you in your sleep tonight.” Though she kept her head resting on his shoulder, she carefully paid attention to how he walked, how much trouble he had on the stairs. “So this is something we need to work on,” she said when they were about halfway up, that professional tone coming back to her that she hadn’t used on him in weeks.

“Hush, da’len,” he said, a smile tugging at his lips, “You may order me around like you normally do once you have recovered fully from your illness.” Abelas gave her a look as he set her down on the floor as they reached their room and he unlocked the door, pushing it open with a slight creak. There was a small fire place already crackling away merrily and he gestured for Ellie to go on in ahead of him. “You should rest before they bring up the tub for your bath.” He missed her weight in his arms.

Ellie was happy to see that instead of two smaller beds, the room had one big bed. At least she’d have an excuse to cuddle with him again and she wondered if Solas had done that on purpose. She walked to the edge of the bed, and flopped face-first onto it. “Ohhhhh,” she groaned, writhing slightly on the softness of it. “I’m never leaving. Never, never, never.” She didn’t want to get under the blankets, thinking that clean sheets after her bath would feel even more amazing. She cracked open one eye and peered at Abelas. “You gonna lay down too or are you gonna keep watch until they bring up that tub?”

He watched her for a moment before he moved over to the bed, kneeling down to her legs so he could unlace the boots that were on her feet. At least the strange clothing was easy enough to understand. When he was finished the stood, moving to sit next to her on the bed, brushing her hair out of her face and chuckling when she moved to place her head on his leg. “If it is alright with you, I will keep watch until they bring the tub. I would prefer not to get caught off guard.”

Ellie nodded and curled up, her head in his lap, and drifted off to sleep. 

When she awoke again, it was to Abelas shaking her shoulder, telling her that her bath was ready. She didn’t know how long she’d been asleep, but it didn’t feel like it had been very long. She sat up and stretched, a smile crossing her lips when her eyes landed on the big tub sitting there with steam curling up from the water. It was an effort to get out of the bed, but she managed it and crossed the room to the tub. She grabbed the hem of her shirt, ready to tear her clothes off and practically dive in, but then paused. She felt a blush bloom across her face all the way up to the tips of her ears. “Ah…” She bit her lip, suddenly feeling shy and self conscious. Abelas seeing her naked while she was on the verge of dying was one thing. But now, it made her feel shy.

He chuckled and turned away from her. “I forget how modest modern day elves have become. When I was protecting Mythal’s temple, we often partook of communal baths. There were heated springs within the temple. They were tiled with turquoise and gold. At sunset when we would bathe, it was quite the sight to behold,” he murmured quietly as he remembered it fondly, “You would have liked them, I think. And you have a body that you should not be ashamed of.” 

“I’m not ashamed,” she answered quickly as she undressed. “I just…” She didn’t know how to put it into words. Saying she was unsure of what exactly her relationship was with Abelas sounded like she was fishing for him to define it. And she didn’t want that. At least, not to put him on the spot like that. If they had that conversation later, that was fine, but not now. She stepped into the tub and moaned as the heat wrapped around her, seeming to seep into her bones as she settled herself. The sides came up to nearly her shoulders and she leaned her head back with a happy sigh. “I know you saw me naked that night I got soaked in the rain. But this just… feels more personal,” she said. “But you can turn around now.”

Abelas turned around when he got her permission and he chuckled at the look of utter bliss on her face. “I suppose it is more personal, isn’t it?” he asked as he moved over to stand next to the tub. “I did not feel this way towards my brethren when we bathed,” he said as he watched her face, “I did not expect to feel this way towards someone who has been able to grind my nerves quite the way that you do, da’len.” He moved towards the door, where he had set their packs and retrieved the soap they had been using and brought it to her. 

Something in her heart gave a little skip at that. She took the soap from him and dipped it in the water before she began to wash her face. Oh Maker, that felt amazing, to be able to wash away the dirt and grime and sweat. She yanked the ties out of her hair and scratched at her scalp to loosen the two buns, then ducked beneath the water and scrubbed at her hair. She stayed under as long as she could, trying to buy herself time, to figure out how to respond to what he’d said. When she couldn’t stand the burn in her lungs anymore, she sat up again. She drew her knees up in the tub, though the soapy water mostly hid her from his view anyway. “Yeah, well, annoying you is sort of my specialty,” she said, uncertain whether she wanted to ask him what he was feeling or not.

Abelas watched her for a moment, reaching into the water to take the soap from her before he began to wash her hair, reminded of the time that she had washed his hair when he had been first brought to Skyhold. “Your face is very red, yet I think it does not have anything to do with the temperature of the water or your illness. If you cannot speak freely with me, then we will be over before we have even begun.”

She sat quietly for a minute, letting him wash her hair for her. How could he seem so comfortable about this while her heart was racing? And he was right; her face felt like it was on fire. She turned slightly to look over her shoulder at him. “What do you want me to say?” she asked, searching his eyes. “You want me to put you on the spot? To ask or say the wrong thing and ruin… whatever it is that’s happening?” She caught his wrist, never tearing her eyes from his. “What is this, Abelas?”

He studied her for a moment, trying to feel out his own emotions on the situation. What was this? It was more than he could have ever dreamed possible. “I am not certain what mortals call it.” He sighed and reached over to a nearby chair, pulling it close so he could sit down, watching her face. “A bond between two people, however unlikely it may be. We have had a rough start, but I find you challenge me in ways I never imagined. You have taught me to depend on others when I need them the most. That even someone such as I, has weaknesses.” 

Why was this so confusing, so hard for her to put into words? Normally Ellie didn’t have a problem speaking what was on her mind. But with him, there was something there now that made her feel like her tongue stuck to the roof of her mouth. She reached up to slide her fingers around the back of his neck, pulling him closer until their foreheads touched. “You are the hardest person to figure out,” she whispered. Then, before she could second guess herself, she pressed her lips firmly to his.

Abelas’s eyes widened a fraction after she pulled him down to kiss her. He was shocked at her boldness, yet pleased by it. It was the Ellie he knew, the assertive healer he knew she was at her heart. It warmed him in a way he couldn’t comprehend, and he pressed his lips back against hers. “I get that a lot, da’len. I do not like to make things easy,” he murmured against her lips, “It has been a while since I have tried this.” He gestured between them. “You do not get to think about the future when all you know is to protect Mythal. I am glad I have the chance to explore this with you.”

Her lips tingled and her heart fluttered from the kiss. She still wasn’t entirely sure what they had, but they had  something.  “I’m glad too,” she said softly and pulled back a bit to see his eyes again. There was a warmth there that made her go all melty inside and she managed a smile for him. “I should… ah… get out so you can get cleaned up,” she stammered, and moved to get out of the tub, then remembered she still had soap in her hair. “Oh! Dammit,” she hissed and laid back in the water to rinse her hair. “I’m all flustered now,” she admitted, feeling her face go hot again. “I blame you.” Maybe it was her turn to make him blush. She stood up slowly, wringing the water from her hair, letting him get a good look at her as she stepped out of the tub. “Your turn.”

Abelas didn’t move his eyes from her form when she stepped from the bath, his mouth growing dry. He had more restraint than this, he could refrain from such an uncouth action, but as she stepped out, he couldn’t stop himself and he reached out to cup her cheek, staring into her eyes, bright as they were. “Help me understand.” 

She tilted her head, leaning her cheek slightly into his palm. She felt that shyness from earlier melting away and a small smile tugged at the corners of her lips. “Understand what?” she asked softly. If he expected her to be able to put this into words easier than he could, well, then they were both in trouble. Her fingers trailed through his hair, brushing over the tip of his pointed ear. “I care about you,” she said, her throat feeling a bit tight. “And I think you care about me.”

“More than what one person would consider wise,” he said before he leaned down and pressed a kiss to the crown of her head before he drew her into his arms, uncaring that she was soaking wet. “But I am finding that I do not care what a wise person would do. I want to care about you, to care for you. Seeing you in danger, ill, it drives me mad and I want nothing more than to make the world bend to keep you from harm.” He smiled down at her. “Even if you will be the death of me, I want to see the future with you in it.”

Ellie’s eyes fluttered shut as she was pulled into the solid warmth of his embrace. Part of her still was unsure what to think, but the other part of her wanted to see where this would lead. She slid her arms around his waist, holding him tightly for a minute or two before she pulled back and looked up at him. “I want that, too,” she said softly and rose up on her tiptoes to press a kiss to his chin. “Now get cleaned up before that water goes cold. You’re not getting in that nice clean bed until you’re nice and clean as well,” she teased with a wink and grabbed up one of the towels, drying off with it before she tossed it aside and crawled into the bed.

This woman really was going to be the death of him, he decided as he watched her disappear into the covers, her eyes turning to watch him and he refrained from rolling his eyes as he stripped his clothes off, not taking his gaze from her as he let the jeans fall from his hips and he stepped into the water. He let his arms rest over the sides of the tub and he tilted his head at her, a smirk tugging at his lips.

Ellie let her eyes drink in the vision of him, the long lean muscles of his body, the confident way he held himself. She watched him for a while as he washed, letting her lips curl in a slight smile whenever he looked over and caught her eyes. “Hurry up,” she said, though her tone didn’t sound demanding at all. “This bed is cold. I need your heat.” She paused and wrinkled her nose. “Besides, you’ll get all pruny if you stay in there much longer. No one likes a pruny sentinel.”

Abelas chuckled at that and finished. “Patience is a virtue,” he said, but stood up and got out of the tub dripping wet. He ignored the chill as he fetched a towel and dried himself off. “I thought you wanted me clean so as not to soil the bed sheets,” he said before he tossed his towel towards hers on the floor and walked over to the other side of the bed, unashamed as he crawled under the covers. His eyes fluttered shut at the sensation, oh but that was divine.

She rolled on her side to face him, smiling at the look of bliss on his face. Now that was something new. She reached under the blankets and found his hand, slipping her fingers through his. “Let’s just stay here for a while,” she said softly. “We can just hide away up here and forget about the world, all the crap that’s happened.” She sank down into the bed, sighing deeply and squeezed his fingers. “I could be happy hiding here with you,” she said sleepily, her eyes falling closed.

He studied her face, a smile growing across his own. “I think I could be as well. Though, you have little say in the matter, you will not be leaving here until you are well enough to start ordering me around again,” he teased her before he drew her against him and he bowed his head over hers, feeling a protectiveness well up within him. He would keep her from harm, this he swore.


	19. Chapter 19

Solas hummed a soft tune to Olivia as he slowly paced the room with her in his arms. Her big eyes blinked sleepily up at him, making him smile. There were no words to express the relief he felt at having her in his arms again. “Go to sleep, da’len,” he said softly, gently bouncing her in his arms as she yawned and snuggled into his chest. It was only moments later that the little one was sound asleep and he was able to lay her down in a basket next to the bed. 

He turned and smiled as Jennifer climbed out of the tub. He couldn’t stop his eyes from traveling over her curves, watching the droplets of water trailing over her smooth skin. “Allow me,” he said and picked up a towel, carefully drying her off. He paused to nibble at her shoulder, and moaned softly into the crook of her neck. “I can barely believe you are here with me,” he said softly.

Jennifer let out a soft groan of appreciation as he tended to her, his lips gentle, his breath warm. She leaned back against him as he continued to dry her off slowly. “Neither can I. When I saw you in my world, I thought… I don’t know what I thought. I thought we could take a breather, but then you were gone the next second and I wanted to scream. I did scream, actually. Scared Ellie and Abelas I think,” she said quietly, lifting her hand to cover his on her shoulder, the towel still bunched up in his fingers, “I can’t believe we made it here in time. If we hadn’t, we would have missed each other again.”

“I would have found you,” he said, gently squeezing her shoulder. “I would not have stopped searching until I found you again. Nothing could have stopped me.” He moved to kneel in front of her, running the towel down her legs, taking his time as he kissed her skin, every inch of her he could reach. “I will never leave your side again,” he promised, sliding his arms around her waist and leaning his forehead against her. He’d felt so lost without her, he never wanted to experience that again. He hugged her tightly. “Never again.”

She looked down at him, letting her arms wrap tightly around his head, holding him to her as she swallowed harshly. “Yeah, I’m not going to let you leave me alone again. You’re stuck with me.” She moved, kneeling down with him until they were face to face. She lifted her hands, cupping his cheeks before she peered into his worried eyes. He still looked as if he and he alone carried the entire weight of the world upon his shoulders. “But you did what you had to. You saved our friends because of that. They needed you and you were there for them. Thank you.” 

The corner of his mouth twitched in a smile. “I didn’t do much,” he admitted, leaning into her touch. “But being pulled into your world like that concerns me. The Veil is weakening, and I believe it is somehow connected to your world. I do not know what it all means, I have not had time to research it. But I fear no good can come from it.” He sighed heavily and leaned his forehead against hers. “I felt like screaming as well, when I saw you for just a moment and then you were gone. I worried that I would end up trapped there, or that you would, that somehow it wouldn’t be possible to get to you, to find you again. And I still fear that.” He swallowed harshly. “We must find a way to fix this.”

Jennifer nodded, moving to wrap her arms around his waist, resting her head on his shoulder. “How can we fix this though? It’s becoming dangerous for all the worlds involved. This world, my world and the Fade. Too many people are going to die if this thing randomly puts people and creatures from one world into another. We can’t let that happen. I have a feeling that it’s got something to do with us, but as to how we can fix it, I have no idea.” 

He hugged her tighter, burying his face into her damp hair. “I do not know either. But it can wait until tomorrow. Tonight, all I want to think about is you,” he whispered against her ear. “Ar lath ma, vhenan.” He pulled back just slightly so he could capture her lips with his own, drinking in the sweetness of her mouth. And for once, he was able to push his worries to the back of his mind.

She nearly sobbed against him, having missed his touch, his warmth for what seemed like so long. She kissed him back with an equal passion, pausing to pull back slightly, looking into his wide eyes. He looked so innocent, so desperate for companionship. It mirrored her own desires and she kissed him again, feeling her heart soar and she thanked the goddess above for allowing her to have this chance with this man. She slid her arms up, over his neck to cup the back of his head, her thumbs brushing over his ears as she sighed into his mouth, “I love you more.”

Solas broke the kiss only long enough to tear his shirt away. A groan escaped him as he gathered her up in his arms, her warm skin pressing against his. It may have only been a few weeks that they had been separated, but it felt like an eternity. “I have to have you,” he said as he got to his feet and carried her over to the bed. He laid her down carefully, then pulled back slowly, letting his hands skim over her as he admired her. “You are so beautiful,” he breathed. His hands quickly worked the laces of his breeches loose, then stepped out of them. A grin split his lips as he crawled on top of her and leaned down to kiss her again.

Jennifer opened her arms, drawing him down into her embrace as he settled over her, their lips meeting once more. Mmm, if there was one thing the game couldn’t do justice, it was the kisses that Solas gave. He put everything into them, his heart and soul, kissing her as if it would be the last time and he wanted to make it last. She felt a warmth settling into her chest as she cupped his cheek, just content to hold him, content to feel his weight securely. She nipped and licked at his lips, begging entrance, wanting to be closer than close. “Ma lath…” 

His lips parted, letting her explore his mouth, their tongues dancing together. He moaned softly against her lips as his length hardened. His hands trailed up her sides to cup her breasts, carefully kneading them with his long fingers. Oh how he’d missed this. He rocked his hips against hers, savoring every sensation of her. He pressed kisses down the side of her neck, pausing to suck at her soft skin. “Jennifer,” he moaned softly into her shoulder, rocking his hips forward again. He slipped his hand down between them, teasing her with his fingertips, his heart giving a skip when he heard her gasp.

She gasped again as she felt his long fingers press inside of her and she swallowed before looking up at him, letting her hands trail down his neck, over his shoulders, cupping at the muscles of his forearms. She smiled warmly at him before letting her hand raise and she caught his chin with her thumb and index finger, tracing the dimple there with a fondness. “Don’t keep us waiting any longer. We’ve waited long enough, don’t you think? Stop torturing yourself.”

He chuckled. “I was trying to make it last,” he said, crooking his fingers inside of her, watching as she squirmed slightly. Oh she was so slick and hot on his fingers, he couldn’t wait another minute. He groaned as he pressed the head of his cock against her entrance, his eyes fluttering shut as he slid into her wet heat. “Vhenan,” he gasped, holding her tightly as he began to thrust into her, moaning at how impossibly tight she felt around him. 

Jennifer let out a long sigh as the elf pressed into her and she let herself curl around him, holding him to her. “Mmm, and here I am being impatient. I’d say I’m sorry, but it would be a lie,” she purred, leaning up and nuzzling at the soft skin of his cheek before she pressed a long kiss there. Her body ached deliciously for him and she couldn’t get enough of him. She held onto him tightly, as if he would slip away from her at any moment and she didn’t think that her heart could bear that. Seeing him just now, holding their daughter, singing to her. It melted her heart in a way she didn’t think possible. 

“I think I like it when you’re impatient,” he murmured. His hands slid to her hips, gripping them tightly and lifting them off the bed to allow him to drive himself deeper into her. He had to bite the inside of his cheek to stop himself from crying out with pleasure. He pressed his lips to hers, kissing her passionately, needfully as he thrust faster into her. Oh, he could do this all night long if she let him. 

She had to grip him harder, her arms going around to his back, digging into the skin as he seemed to just melt into her. Not that she was complaining. Weeks on the cold road without him to warm her bed? No, she’d never complain. She would make her home in him, if he would let her. 

The slight sting of her nails on his skin only heightened his pleasure and he nearly whimpered in her embrace. “Vhenan,” he gasped, his voice cracking slightly, “I don’t know how much longer I can wait.” He bit his lip and thrust harder into her, faster, his toes curling with the effort to hold off his orgasm. He didn’t want it to end yet, but he needed to come. He didn’t think he could hold out much longer. “Please, come with me,” he begged.

Jennifer bit her lip so hard, she tasted blood, the feeling of him in her so good, and she was so close. “Almost there, love. So close,” she breathed and lifted her hips up a little more, angling just a little to the… right there. “Solas!” she cried out as stars popped in front of her eyes and she clenched her legs tightly around his waist as she came, her body throbbing in time with her heartbeat. 

His eyes rolled back in his head as he felt her come around him, her body squeezing him tightly. He gave in a moment later, a strangled sound issuing from his throat as his cock swelled and spilled inside her. “Oh,” he groaned as he finally stilled, his body relaxing after the intense pleasure. He breathed deeply and slowly for a moment before he met her eyes, a smile splitting his face. “I love you,” he whispered and pressed a tender kiss to her lips.

She smiled against him, kissing him back lazily as she relaxed back against the bed. She kept her legs wrapped around him, locking her ankles over the small of his back as she tilted her head at him. “Mmmm, I missed this. Missed you.” She sighed out, looking up at him as they pulled away. “If only you weren’t so bound by duty. I’d like to just go away. The three of us but I know how important everything is to you. I don’t think I would care for you as much as I do if I didn’t know how passionate you were. About everything.”

He kissed her again before he moved to lay at her side, pulling her closer to him. “One day, Vhenan, we will. Once I have set things right, we will make plenty of time for ourselves,” he said, trailing his fingers through her soft hair, studying her face. “If I have any say in it, we will have eternity together to do anything we please. Just be patient, if you can,” he said, almost teasingly. “I know it is not your strong point. But when the world is right again, you and Olivia will be my only focus.”

Jennifer studied him for a moment, tracing her fingers over the planes of his face, careful with the darker circles under his eyes. “I’m going to hold you to that, Solas.” She laughed the next moment, “Especially the whole putting up with me for an eternity. I know how I can be, a bit grating on the nerves. Or so most people tell me. Mainly Lindsey.” She leaned forward and kissed the tip of his nose as she watched his blue eyes. “I won’t let you get rid of me. I’ll be like your shadow.”

“I would never try to be rid of you,” he said, rubbing his nose against hers. He pulled her closer, then tugged the blankets up around their shoulders. He laid flat on his back and let her rest her head on his chest as he drew his fingertips up and down her back. “You shouldn’t say such things, Vhenan,” he scolded softly. “You are not grating on the nerves. And if your sister has convinced you otherwise, perhaps I should have words with her.” He pressed a kiss to her forehead. “You are perfect the way you are.”

She hummed against him, pressing a kiss to his chest before she leaned back so she could look up at him easily. She just wanted to stare at him all night, but with the danger over. Being safe in bed with him, her body still thrumming from the intense pleasure of being joined with him again, she was starting to feel the exhaustion of the past few weeks catching up with her. “You always know the right words to say. Charmer,” she teased him, brushing her fingers over his skin, “A small nap, then I want more. We have to make up for lost time.”

He chuckled and nodded. “Alright, Vhenan,” he said and pressed another kiss to her forehead. He knew he would sleep well that night for the first time in weeks. He held her tight as he relaxed back into the bed, feeling sleep pulling at him already. “But just remember, we have forever to make up for lost time.”

* * *

 

Jennifer woke with a start, a cold sweat beading on her forehead as she sat up straight, her heart pounding. Shit, shit shit shit. She turned to her side and shook her love’s shoulder. “Solas! Solas wake up! Wake up now!” she pleaded, going so far as to pinch his arm before she scrambled out of the bed and went right for her clothes, tugging them on. Her mind swam with the message she had gotten and she could barely think straight.

Solas jumped awake, blinking in bewilderment at Jennifer’s frantic tone. “What’s wrong?” he asked, his voice groggy as he sat up and watched her move like a whirlwind around the room. He barely flinched when she threw his clothes at him. He’d been in such a deep sleep, it was hard for his mind to catch up with what she was doing. He began to dress, concern growing as he became more awake. “Vhenan, slow down,” he said as he stood and tied his breeches. “What’s happened?”

“It’s my sister! She, Cullen and Cassandra have been caught by bandits. Cassandra’s been shot in the leg and they can’t stop her from bleeding out. She said that the bandit’s that shot Cassandra have Varric’s crossbow.” Her heart wrenched at the idea. “Fuck, that means Varric is…” She bit her lip and swallowed hard. She would get to that when she was forced to. “They left the bolt in her leg, but that blood isn’t stopping,” she said firmly as she grabbed her pack off of the ground and dumped the extra stuff that she had in it onto the bed, “We have to move fast. Can’t take Olivia with us, I’ll give her to Dorian and take the health potions he has.” 

“Fenedhis,” Solas cursed as he yanked on his shirt. He could see the worry and the hurt in her eyes, but he could admire how well she was holding it together. “We must have a talk with your sister about being captured,” he said as he leaned over to pick up the baby, who was still sound asleep. He grabbed up his staff with his free hand and slipped it onto his back. “Hurry, Vhenan. If I transform, we can get there quickly. Do you have an idea of where they are?” At her nod, he grabbed her hand and led her out of their room and down the hall to pound on Dorian’s door. “Dorian! Wake up! It is an emergency!”

Dorian tripped over his pants as he fumbled out of the bed and to the door, tugging the breeches up over his hips before he opened the door, trying to rub the sleep from his face. “Maker’s breath, Solas, what in Thedas could be an emergency at this hour?!” He blinked, eyes wide as he suddenly found his arms full of the little elven babe and he looked back up at not only Solas, but Jennifer as well, “What’s going on?”

Jennifer shook her head. “No time to explain, have to save my sister and the others. Watch Olivia for us. Protect her with your life,” she said quickly as she walked past Dorian and headed for his travel pack. “Health potions, where are they? Cassandra is injured and we need to hurry. You stay here, protect Ellie and Abelas and our baby.” 

Bull sat up in bed, watching Jennifer rummage in Dorian’s bag. He almost offered to help, but he could see that he and Dorian would only slow them down this time. “We’ll keep an eye on her. You two be careful, bring them back,” he said and laid back, tucking his arm behind his head. “Healing potions are in the pocket on the side there, Jen.”

Solas gave a nod of thanks to Bull and Dorian, then grabbed Jennifer’s hand and ran down the stairs. “Put those potions in your pocket,” he instructed her as he led her out of the tavern and down the road that led out of town. His mind was ablaze, wondering if he could get them there fast enough, if they could save her friends and sister once again. “Take this,” he said, moving to strap his staff to her back once they were clear of the edge of town. He met her eyes with an intense gaze. “Hold on tight, we cannot waste the time if you fall and get injured. You won’t hurt me, so hold on as tightly as you can.” He pressed a quick kiss to her lips, then stepped back, letting himself transform into the giant six-eyed wolf. He shivered, then looked at her and bowed low to make it easier for her to climb onto his back.

Jennifer nodded and hoisted herself up onto Solas’s back, her fingers threading through the thick fur as she settled herself over him. She leaned forward, towards his long ear. “It’s along the river somewhere.” She swallowed and closed her eyes trying to remember what Lindsey had said. “They were working their way down the river from Skyhold, trying to find Varric.” She bit her lip. “There’s a camp, they were eating humans, elves, dwarfs. I don’t suppose you know the scent of death cooking over an open fire?”

His stomach twisted at the mere thought, but he gave a nod. It wouldn’t be hard to pick up on such an unusual scent. He gave his head a shake, trying to put it out of his mind what could drive a person to cannibalism, and he started forward at a breakneck speed, determined to get to the others before they could meet such a terrible fate. 


	20. Chapter 20

Lindsey blinked awake in the early morning light, her back stiff from sleeping while sitting up. Her head leaned on Cullen’s shoulder and she sat up straighter, her neck popping as she yawned. He didn’t look like he’d slept at all, and she frowned, reaching over to touch his chin. She hated this, hated feeling so helpless, but now a spark of hope flared in her chest. “Jennifer and Solas are coming for us,” she whispered to him. “I found her in my dreams. Don’t worry. We’re getting out of this alive.” 

Cullen let her hand move his face towards hers. He hadn’t slept at all, keeping watch on their gracious ‘hosts’ while they slept. The man, Bryce, had an arm around Varric’s crossbow the whole time that was aimed at them. He didn’t trust these crazy bandits, especially not with the remains of something, someone, still roasting over the fire. He felt terrible, as if his eyes had been scratched with sandpaper. He was exhausted and he knew it showed, but he would be damned before he let them attack them while their trousers were down, so to speak. He glanced at Cassandra who was deadly quiet, but she stared off into the distance. Tears streaked down her face as a harsh look turned her into an almost stony appearance. “Do you know how far away they are? Do they know where to find us? I’m not even sure where we are.”

She licked her lips and cast a nervous glance at the bandits watching over them. She didn’t want to look too suspicious. She leaned back into him, trying to make it look like she was just resting her head into his neck again. “A town, she didn’t say where. I told them to follow the river,” she said quietly. “Let’s hope they get here soon. I think we might have a little time. These… bandits seem like they have enough to eat at the moment.”

A slight sneer crossed Cassandra’s lips. She was still close enough that she could just make out Lindsey’s whispered words. It disgusted her to no end to know that this had become Varric’s fate. She had to try to stop herself from thinking about it, about what they’d done to him. They would pay for this. Somehow.

She looked down at the bolt in her leg. It throbbed horribly; the blood had congealed around either side of it. She snorted and looked away again. “Solas can have what’s left when I’m done with them,” she murmured under her breath. She stared at nothing, or at least it would have seemed that way to anyone who didn’t know her. Though her eyes didn’t move, she was watching them, calculating, trying to find their weakest point.

Cullen nodded, his arm tightening around Lindsey as he held her close. He watched with disgust as the woman, Anya? She laughed as she spoke with Bryce at the fire pit, turning the spit of something he really didn’t want to think about. It looked like a leg, shorter than any human leg. He closed his eyes, sending a silent prayer to Andraste and swore that Varric would have a proper ceremony once they got out of that place. “I’m inclined to agree with you, Lady Cassandra,” he said darkly.

Anya stood up and cut several large slices of meat from the bone roasting over the fire and plopped them on a wooden plate. She picked one up with her fingers and sank her teeth into it, giving a slight moan. A smirk touched her lips as she exchanged a look with Bryce, then walked over to their captives. “Hungry?” she asked, offering the plate out to them. She moved it slowly side to side in front of them. “C’mon, you haven’t eaten since yesterday. You must be hungry. This dwarf is delicious.”

If Cullen wasn’t going to be sick before, he was now. The smell of the cooked flesh was terrible and it was even worse knowing that it was. He bared his teeth at her. “Get that away from us! You must be out of your heads if you think we would desecrate our friend’s body by eating him.” He pressed his lips thin, holding Lindsey’s head to his shoulder, shielding her eyes from the sight. “If you had any shred of humanity left within you, you would throw these remains into the fire.”

Lindsey tried to hold her breath, the smell and very idea of it all making her gag. Oh, she didn’t know if she could handle it. Her heart ached for Varric, for what they had done to him. “Bastards,” she managed to gasp out.

A mock pout crossed Anya’s lips. “No? You’re missing out. This meat is really good,” she said and picked up another piece, smacking her lips and moaning as she bit into it. She let her eyes roll obscenely as she chewed and swallowed. “C’mon, pretty lady. Have a bite,” she said, holding the plate towards Cassandra.

A rage like she’d never felt before welled up in Cassandra. The guilt, the heartache of losing Varric all spiraled down into an intense wrath as that bitch waved a plate of his remains at her. It was too much, she couldn’t handle it, and she grit her teeth, breathing heavily, her hands starting to shake. No… No, this was too much…

She snapped.

“DAMN YOU!” she cried and flung herself at Anya, knocking the plate from her hands as she tackled the other woman to the ground. “I’ll kill you! I’LL KILL YOU!” she screamed as they struggled, Anya clearly caught off guard, giving Cassandra the advantage. Not that she needed it. She slammed her fist into Anya’s face, then pulled back, revenge the only thought in her mind. She grabbed the bolt in her leg and pulled it free, barely even feeling the pain or the blood that began to soak her leg. And before Anya could even react, Cassandra stabbed her with the bolt, over and over, relishing in the way she screamed.

Cullen cursed under his breath at the sight, moving to pull Lindsey up as Cassandra attacked Anya with a fury he had never seen before. He grit his teeth as he glanced around for anything he could use to defend Lindsey and himself as with a roar, the other bandits around the fire reacted to Cassandra’s assault. “Stay behind me!” he shouted and lifted his hands in front of them and wishing that he could get to his sword and shield that Bryce had stashed in the tent. His fists would do little against Varric’s crossbow, but he could protect Lindsey.

Bryce ran to Anya’s aid, but it was too late. He shoved Cassandra away, watching in horror as Anya bled out in mere seconds. “You bitch,” he snarled as he looked at Cassandra who lay panting on the ground. He rose to his feet, shouldering the crossbow and aiming it at her. “I was gonna let you live for a while longer. I should’ve killed you from the start!”

Cassandra felt dizzy, her heart pounding, making her leg seem to bleed that much faster. She was still shaking with rage, breathing heavily as tears streamed down her face. She didn’t care. Varric was dead and nothing mattered now. At least she’d gotten her revenge. She sat up a little straighter, the movement taking more effort than it should have. “Do it.”

“With pleasure,” Bryce growled, his finger moving for the trigger, but he roared in pain the next second and dropped to his knees.

Cullen had ducked, tripping up a bandit that had been running at him, flipping him over his shoulder before standing up straight and punching another one in the face with a satisfying crunch as he broke a nose. He froze when he saw Bryce aim the crossbow point blank at Cassandra’s face. However the next instant showed the man on the ground, Bianca knocked away and a crude arrow protruded from the man’s chest. 

He quickly pulled Lindsey to him as he glanced towards where the arrow originated from and his eyes widened as he saw a hooded figure standing upwind of the camp, firing more arrows at the other bandits who had been shocked by the sudden turn of events. Each landed with deadly accuracy. 

“What’s going on?” Lindsey cried, staying close to Cullen as the bandits panicked, nearly ignoring the two of them. For a split second, she thought that perhaps Jennifer and Solas had come to their rescue, but neither of them were archers. She only caught a quick glimpse of the hooded figure, but there wasn’t time to focus on that. “Cassandra! We have to help her before she bleeds to death!”

Cullen nodded, not caring who had come to their rescue, a member of the dwarven carta he imagined. Maybe they had learned Varric was out in these parts and had come looking for him for some reason or another. He would be disappointed when he realized that the bandits had already killed him. “Get our weapons from the tent! I’ll stop the bleeding!” he shouted as he skidded to his knees and he ripped his cloak, tying a tourniquet above the bolt wound before pressing the rest of the ruined cloth to the freshly bleeding wound. 

Cassandra was barely aware of what was going on around her. She fell back flat on the ground, her mind dizzy as a coldness seemed to sink  into her. “Cullen,” she gasped, shivering as she lay there. Oh, that was stupid, to give up her life to kill that other woman. But she had no regrets. She’d avenged Varric, and perhaps they would be together again in the next life. “S-Sorry,” she breathed, looking up at her friend as he tried to stop the bleeding. Everything had gone rather quiet around her; were the bandits all dead? Had they run for it? She supposed it didn’t matter now. 

“You know...” 

Cullen looked up as a familiar voice reached his ears and he watched as the hooded archer walked over to them, a crude bow made out of a gnarled piece of yew in his hands. His mouth fell open as the dwarf reached up and pushed back his cloak. 

“Had you waited about five more seconds, Seeker, I would have put an arrow through that bitch’s head first.” 

The ex-Templar was stunned as he watched the dwarf hurry to Cassandra’s side, kneeling next to the woman. “Varric, you… you’re alive! But the bandits! They said...” He winced and looked back over towards the fire where the remains were starting to burn. “They killed a dwarf. After we saw Bianca…” He trailed off as he watched the man take Cassandra’s hand in his own. The explanation could wait.

“Varric,” Cassandra gasped in disbelief. For a moment, she thought she was hallucinating, that she was imagining him, a combination of wishful thinking and blood-loss. But his hand in hers felt too real, the vision of him so vivid. Oh to hell with it, if she was dying all she wanted to see was his face. “I thought you were dead,” she said, tears leaking from her eyes as she stared up at him, not even wanting to blink for fear he may disappear again. Her chest rose and fell heavily as she tried to breathe, and with her other hand she reached up to touch his face. “Maker, I am a fool.”

Varric smiled against her hand as he leaned into her touch. “Oh they tried to kill me. Gave it their best shot too,” he said as he settled down next to her, gathering her up into his arms as he hugged her tightly. He knew he had to look a mess, his clothing torn, stained, dirty. His hair stringy and tangled. “Shit, but I said I was going to see you later, didn’t I? As if I would lie to you again,” he murmured, glancing down at her leg where Cullen had his cloak pressed tightly, “So, you had better hang in there, Cass. Don’t you dare slip away from me now.”  

“You picked a hell of a time to start telling me the truth,” she managed to say, leaning heavily into him. Oh, that was so stupid of her. He’d been so close, if only she hadn’t let her temper get away from her, maybe she wouldn’t be in this mess now. His arms felt so strong and warm around her and she tried to draw that into herself, to savor it. All this time searching for him, knowing in her heart that he was alive, then to be told he was dead, and now only to find him alive and she was the one dying instead. She looked up at him, meeting his eyes, thinking of saying something about how cruel life was. But she didn’t want her last words to him to be sad or angry. “I love you, Varric,” she whispered.

He chuckled and leaned down, catching her lips in a desperate kiss, groaning out at the softness of her that he had nearly forgotten. “Don’t go anywhere. Not now that I’m here. Stay awake. Stay,” he begged as he held her tightly. He looked up at Lindsey and Cullen, “Shit. Don’t we have any kind of health potions? What about the crazies here? Someone has to have something!”

“I’m looking! I’m looking!” Lindsey cried as she frantically dug through packs, crates, the pockets of the now-dead bandits. “These bastards don’t have anything useful on them!” She blinked at the tears in her eyes as she continued to search, but turned up nothing. “God damn it!” She could hear Cassandra’s breath becoming more ragged; she didn’t know what to do to help. “Where the hell is-” Her question broke off as the huge white wolf came racing into the camp, Jennifer riding on his back. “About time!” she shouted.

Jennifer slid off of Solas’s back the instant he skidded to a stop, her eyes drinking in the carnage of the camp. It made her sick to her stomach and seeing the bandits already dead was a little comfort. She reached for her pack and withdrew the health potions she had stashed there and rushed to Varric’s side, handing them over to Cullen. “We left as soon as we woke up. Didn’t take him long to pick up the scent of the burning bodies. Smelled that away for miles. Makes me sick to think of how long they’ve been at this.” She swallowed harshly as she watched Cassandra’s eyes blinking, trying to stay awake. 

Cullen popped the cork on a health potion and, with Varric tilting back Cassandra’s head, he held it to her lips, letting the Seeker take sips of it at first. “Come on, that’s it,” he murmured as he watched her with his breath held as she drank, “Jennifer, her leg. Do you have anything that you can put on it while we wait for the potion to do it’s work? A poultice or something?” He couldn’t describe the relief that he felt at her nod as she pulled out a handful of elfroot and began working. 

Cassandra gulped down the potion, leaning back into Varric once the bottle was empty. She was still cold, but her breath came a little easier, and she silently prayed to the Maker for mercy. All she wanted was a little more time with Varric. Her leg stung and ached as Jennifer worked on it, but she didn’t let it show in her face. A gasp of a laugh escaped her as hope flared in her chest. “You may just be stuck with me yet,” she said, reaching up again to touch his rough cheek. She didn’t care that he looked a mess, dirty and unshaven, fear in his eyes that she knew was for her. He looked more handsome to her in that moment than he ever had before.

Varric snorted, but a grin worked it’s way across his face as he smiled down at her. “You sure you want to be stuck with me, Seeker? While I’m looking like this? Shit, I wouldn’t be surprised if you turned tail and headed for the Maker’s side. I’ve had a hell of a couple of weeks and I know I probably don’t look or smell the greatest.” He lifted a hand and cupped her cheek, brushing his thumb over her high cheekbone.

“You’ve never been more handsome,” she breathed. She could feel the potion working its way through her, healing her, and she relaxed more into his embrace. She was going to make it through this. A smile split her lips and she leaned up to kiss him, wrapping her arm around his neck in a tight hug. She wanted to cry for joy. “I knew I’d find you,” she whispered. “I kept searching, kept looking for you. I just knew I would find you again.”

Varric smiled, feeling the tears slipping down his cheeks as he held her tightly. “I’ve got one hell of a story to tell you,” he said, swallowing thickly before he studied her again, reassuring himself that she was in his arms, that the past weeks hadn’t been all for naught. He held her hand tightly, remembering that terrifying moment when he had been forced to let go. Never again. Never again would he let go. He looked up then, meeting Lindsey’s eyes with his own and he smiled at her, “I’m alive thanks to you. If you hadn’t given me that charm…” He trailed off and looked back at Cassandra, “I would be dead a hundred times over by now.” 

“I am certain it will be a tale worth telling,” Solas said, coming to stand over Jennifer and watching as she worked. He was proud of her; she’d been able to take her knowledge of herbs and healing in her world and made them work in this one. Her talents never ceased to amaze him and he gave an approving nod when she tied a bandage around Cassandra’s leg to keep out infection. The bleeding was stopped, another dose or two of healing potions over the next couple days would heal it completely. “We all have stories to tell, I imagine. But perhaps they would be best told somewhere safe and dry, and over a strong drink.”

“Chuckles, you are speaking my language,” he said as he moved to stand, helping Cassandra up off the ground with Cullen’s help. “But I think before we get that drink, we get as far away from this place as we can. Help Cassandra get on one of those horses, Curly.” He gave the Seeker’s hand a tight squeeze before he went to get Bianca off of the ground. 

Jennifer smiled as she stood up, looking at the crude bow that Varric held in his hands as he shouldered his crossbow. “Where in the world did you find that thing?”sShe asked as she went over to him, wrapping him up in a tight hug. “You make it yourself? It’s got quite the firepower to it.”

Varric chuckled and looked at it. “It was a pain to make and doesn’t shoot as well as Bianca can, but it was all I could come up with after these bandits stole my crossbow from me. The dwarf they caught was Carta who spotted it and thought he could use them to find me. Didn’t work out so well for him,” he muttered as he looked around the campsite, but there was nothing there that he wanted. “Come on. I can’t think here with all of the smells.”

Cassandra was grateful for Cullen’s help getting up on the horse; she didn’t think she could’ve managed it on her own. But she felt strong enough that she could ride to wherever they were going. She didn’t care where, just so long as it was away from this place. She reached out a hand and helped Varric up onto the horse behind her. “I expect to hear the full story tonight while we eat dinner,” she said to him, thinking on the town that Jennifer and Solas had stayed in. Surely they’d found lodging there, and the thought brought a smile to her lips. A warm bed sounded amazing, especially if she could share it with Varric.

Varric smiled against Cassandra’s back as he wrapped his arms around her waist, pressing his face into her. It was a comfort, even though he knew that they both had been through hell ever since Corypheus had attacked Skyhold, even though they both were in terrible need of a good wash and new clothes, this moment made it all better. He turned his head, watching as the others climbed onto the spare horses that had been left behind by the now dead bandits. “So, Chuckles, how far to this town?”


	21. Chapter 21

Cassandra felt amazing as she tromped down the stairs of the tavern, having bathed and changed into clean clothes. She walked with only a slight limp, which would hopefully go away in a day or so. She’d sat on the bed while Varric got cleaned up, taking his time while he shaved his face, and she secretly suspected he was taking his time just to irk her. He knew she wanted to hear this story, but she wasn’t going to make him retell it a million times over. 

“I would say I hope this place has good food, but I am so hungry, as long as it does not eat me first, I will be happy,” she said as they made their way over to the tables that had been pushed together, their friends sitting there, waiting. “I think you have an audience for your tale already.”

He chuckled at her, his arm going around her waist as he guided her over to the group. He already felt a million times better than he had been and finally some of the cold was starting to seep out of his bones. His stomach growled loudly at him as the smell of food, good food drifted through the air. “Anything here has to be better than what we’ve had over the weeks.” His face felt better now that it didn’t have a few week’s worth of stubble, almost a beard, but he’d be damned if he let that happen. His hair was finally clean and pulled back, but he’d have to have it cut a few inches later. He pulled out a chair for Cassandra before he took a seat next to Lindsey, flashing her a smile, “Sorry to keep you all waiting, I hope someone ordered all the food in the house and a round of drinks.”

“Bull and Dorian did,” Lindsey answered, nodding across the table at the two men. Dorian still had baby Olivia in his arms and was refusing to hand her back to her mother. She snickered at the mage and shook her head. Like Varric and Cass, she and Cullen had had a chance to get cleaned up and she felt much better for it. Cullen, on the other hand, had nearly fallen asleep in the tub and she’d had to drag him downstairs to eat, promising that he could sleep for days after he’d had a decent meal. She looked expectantly at Varric. “Well, go on. Everyone’s dying to hear your story,” she said.

He laughed and leaned back. “Fine fine.” He took a deep breath and looked around the table, recalling that day he had fallen into the river. “So, no shit. There I was…” 

He told the tale of himself falling into the river. Of how he thought for certain that he was going to die, but that a mysterious woman had found him on the bank and taken him in, nursed him back to health. “Funny thing is, she reminded me of you two sisters. I almost thought it was your Grandmother. Silly, I know. I even asked her name, thinking it would be Olivia for sure. But she said her name was Dot.”

Lindsey dropped her fork with a loud clatter. “Dot?” she asked, looking over at her sister, who looked equally as surprised. “Ah, Varric… I think you may have been more right than you realize. Gramma’s first name is Dorothy. A lot of people called her Dot.” She chewed her lip for a moment, then slid her chair back from the table with a noisy scrape, and hurried up the stairs to the room she and Cullen had rented.

Bull chuckled at the redhead’s sudden disappearance. “I think you freaked her out,” he said to the dwarf, then continued to eat his steak, chewing thoughtfully for a moment. He swallowed and looked at Dorian. “How come I’m the only one who hasn’t met this Gramma?” he suddenly asked in an almost accusatory tone as Lindsey thundered back down the stairs, the spellbook in her hands.

“Had it stuffed in my bag,” she explained breathlessly at the looks she received. She blinked and looked around. “What? I saved a few things before Skyhold fell.” She set the book on the table with a loud thump and began to thumb through it. “I know you met Gramma’s spirit that one night we did the dream spell, but sometimes it’s hard to picture what someone looked like when they were younger. Where… here it is!” She grabbed up the photo stashed between the pages. It was an old black and white picture of her grandmother when she was a young woman. She handed it to Varric. “That’s Gramma when she was in her late twenties or so. Is that the woman you saw?”

Jennifer watched as Varric’s eyes widened and she chuckled under her breath as she heard him whisper in awe, “Andraste’s tits, that’s her.”  She looked at him, his finger tracing the photo before he looked up to look at Lindsey and then herself. She could see the confusion on his face. “Olivia is her middle name, Varric,” she explained. 

He looked back down at the photo, the knowing look of the woman there had been the exact same one he remembered taking care of him for an entire week. “Shit, I didn’t think…” He trailed off, his words catching in his throat, “How was that even possible? She saved my ass, physically touched me, made me food, medicine.” He remembered how the food had turned to ash in the mouths of the bandits who had stolen it from him and he supposed now it made since. 

“Oh who fucking knows,” Lindsey muttered as she took the photo back and put it back in the book. “I learned a long time ago to not question the things Gramma did or how she did them.” She carefully laid the book under her chair. It almost seemed impossible that Gramma could have pulled this one off, but there it was. “But I can guarantee you one thing,” she said as she sat up straighter and looked at Varric again. “Gramma is sitting at her kitchen table, in her house, in the Fade, laughing - her - ass - off.”

Dorian snorted as he reached looked up from the babe in his arms. “I have no doubt about that. Hawke’s ass has to be positively red by now if he is in the Fade with her,” he said as he looked across the table to Varric, “That being said, Solas, didn’t you once mention that if a spirit could manifest in physical form if they had a will and conviction that was strong enough to do so?”

“Mmm,” Solas nodded. “It would seem that their grandmother has abilities that are similar to Cole’s. It is a rare thing, but not entirely unheard of. Though it is puzzling. Cole is a spirit who took human form. Gramma, on the other hand, was human first and lives on in spirit in the Fade.” A small smile tugged at his lips and he reached for Jennifer’s hand beneath the table. “It seems your grandmother is a remarkably talented woman, both in life and after.”

Jennifer smiled at that thought. “More like she liked to have her hands in all of the cookie jars at once, something that was so strong not even death could stop her.” She smiled over at Varric, catching the way he and Cassandra were sitting shoulder to shoulder, stealing glances at each other as they ate. “I’m really glad that she didn’t let death stop her from doing anything. Without her, things would be different and I don’t think for the better.”

Cassandra gave a nod. It had, after all, been Gramma who had guided them into Jennifer and Lindsey’s world when the rift pulled them through. Had she not done that, who knew where all of their lives would be now? She and Varric might not have fallen in love. And the very thought of that made her heart ache. “We owe much to your grandmother,” she said softly before she finished off her meal. She squeezed Varric’s knee, feeling a new appreciation for the old woman she’d only met once in a dream. 

Varric reached down, covering Cassandra’s hand with his own as he took a long drink from his cup of ale before he recounted what had happened after he had left, following the river in hopes of running into Cassandra and the others before he had been found by the cannibalistic bandits. He pressed his lips together and shook his head as he thought about it. “It’s something I hope I don’t have to tell again. I think I’m going to leave that out of my adventures of glory and all that.” He sighed, giving Cassandra a smile, “There’s a reason I don’t make myself the hero of the story. They get the absolute worst shit done to them. Ever.”

* * *

 

Cassandra was grateful when the dinner conversation finally died down, everyone recounting their parts of the journey for one another, and she and Varric were able to slip away for the night. She all but dragged him up the stairs, nearly shoved him into their rented room, and firmly locked the door behind her. “Finally,” she breathed and threw herself at him, crushing her lips desperately to his. A knot formed in her throat and tears formed beneath her eyelids as she kissed him passionately. Oh, this was what she’d been waiting for all the time she’d been searching for him.

Varric caught her in his arms as she all but wrapped herself around him. He sighed into her kiss, reaching up to cup her cheek as he kissed at her lips, his tongue chasing hers, and he groaned. She was real, she was in his arms and the danger was finally past. “Remind me to never get into that kind of death defying situation ever again. I think I’ve just about used up my nine lives.”

She shook her head adamantly and kissed him again. “No. We have done enough. We have risked our lives plenty. We are going away somewhere and taking time for ourselves,” she said. Uncharacteristic as it may have been for her, she needed a damn break. They had been through too much. “Besides, you promised to marry me. Don’t we at least get a little time to ourselves for that?”

He smiled, crushing her to him for another passionate kiss before he turned her around and backed her up towards the bed in the room. He gently pushed her down onto the mattress, reluctant to pull back but he did to tug his shirt off over his head, tossing it to a nearby chair. “I think we can spare a little time for that. We can slip away, get married. I’m having a hard time figuring out what you want in the way of a wedding,” he murmured as he crawled on top of the bed, fixing her with an intense look as he tried to picture their wedding, what it might look like. “I see you wearing your armor, polished to a shine, but little flowers stuck in that braid of yours and a bouquet of red roses in your hands.”

“I don’t care about the wedding,” she said as she hurriedly pulled her clothes off, tossing them away. She rolled to her side and wrapped her arm around him, kissing him again. “All I care about is being your wife. That is what matters to me. How we get there isn’t important.” She could barely believe her own words, she was usually such a sucker for romance, but really being married was more important than the ceremony of it, wasn’t it? “I love you,” she breathed between kisses, running her hands all over him, loving the feel of his warm skin against her palm. “All that matters to me is that you’re at my side.”

He was finding it hard to argue with that logic and he let her pull him down on top of her. He gave in easily, bracing his arms above her for a moment before he let her pull them close. “Damn right. Won’t matter if you have a romantic ceremony. I’ll make every day, every moment of your life as full of the sickeningly sweet romantic passion that you love,” he vowed before he kissed her, kissed her lips, her nose, her cheeks, finally moving to kiss along her neck. Maker’s breath, she smelled fantastic. The soap from the bath and then something that was entirely all her own. The scent that smelled of leather and sword oil. “I love you more than life itself.”

Now THAT was romantic. Cassandra felt her heart melt at his words and she kissed at his shoulder, the side of his neck, a soft moan issuing from her throat. “You always know just what to say to me,” she murmured, lifting her hips to press herself against him. She’d been so close to losing him that day, of being forever separated from him. Now she wanted to be as close to him as physically possible. She sucked at his throat, writhing beneath him, and whispered, “Make love to me, Varric.”

Varric moved quickly, shucking his pants off and kicked them off the bed. “I can do that, Seeker,” he murmured quietly and he drew her into his embrace, lifting his hand to cup at her breast. He moaned against her as he drew his thumb over the pert nipple, moving to pinching it, tugging it for a moment before he moved downwards, kissing at her neck and down between the valley of her breasts before he took that pert nipple into his mouth. 

She sucked air through her teeth, jolts of pleasure shooting through her body and pooling low in her belly. “Oh Maker,” she moaned, her breasts tingling and swelling under his ministrations. She wrapped a long leg over the back of his, grinding her hips up against his hardening length, teasing him. No, that wasn’t enough. She reached down and grasped his cock, stroking it, keeping her touch slightly too light and her strokes a little too slow.

He gave a strangled gasp around her flesh as her hands curled around him, firm and calloused from the years of wielding a sword. She felt absolutely divine upon him and he couldn’t stop his hips as they jerked forward into her touch. He drank in everything that she had to offer him. The thought that he had almost lost this, lost her, it was almost too much to bear and he skimmed his hands over her curves. “Easy, or you will have this ending before we even begin. You know I’m a night owl. I could spend all night with you until the sun comes up.”

The very thought of spending the whole night with him like this made a shiver race up her spine. “Do not threaten me with a good time, dwarf,” she teased, squeezing his length a little tighter in her hand. Her core throbbed with want and she could feel herself getting wetter for him. She dipped her head to nibble at his ear, playing with his earring for a moment. Her back arched when he sucked at her other breast, teasing her nipple with his teeth. “Varric,” she whined.

Varric sighed contently against her as she arched against him. He smiled at her and he pushed himself up, kissing at her lips before he moved to sit up against the headboard and he gently tugged on her wrist, pulling her up to him. He let his hands slip over her arms as he pulled her to straddle him, letting his hand drop down between her legs, thumbing at her clit, his eyes locking with her dark ones. “Cass,” he breathed, reaching up with his other hand to cup her cheek, remembering the time after he fell. How he was so certain that he would never again be able to have a moment like this with her.

She threw her head back with a gasp as he touched her, making her tremble with pleasure. She locked her gaze with his again a moment later as she reached down to wrap her fingers around his cock, stroking him in time with the movements of his thumb over her. It was intense, intimate, and yet somehow just not quite enough. She’d been separated from him for so long, she didn’t know how much longer she could stand it. “Please, Varric,” she begged softly, leaning down to breathe hotly in his ear. “Let me have you.”

He chuckled and nodded, his hands going to her hips before he helped to lift her up over his length before he pulled her down over him carefully. He groaned out, his head leaning back against the headboard as her warm, tight heat settled around him, squeezing him tightly. “Mmm, fuck Seeker, I missed you. I missed you so much.”

“I missed you too,” she said quietly, panting softly as his thick, hard length filled her. It made her feel whole to be connected so intimately to him again. She rolled her hips, grinding down on him, moaning as she felt him shift within her. It made her ache in the most delicious sort of way and she rolled her hips again, savoring the feeling of friction against her clit, they way his cock stretched her body. “Varric,” she panted, biting her lip. “Oh Maker.”

Varric ran his hands up and down her sides, pausing to cup her breasts, letting their weight settle in hands before he drew her against him as he craned his neck up to kiss her passionately. “I thought about this,” he breathed against her, “I thought about you every single night, wondering where you were, if you were alright. I knew I had to find you and tell you that I was still alive.” He closed his eyes as he thrust up against her, savoring the pleasure. “Maker, I prayed that when I found you, you would be in one piece.”

“I knew you were alive,” she breathed, cupping his face in her hands as she rode him slowly, her pleasure steadily climbing as they moved in tandem. “I don’t know how I knew, but I just knew. I was not going to stop until I found you.” A whimper escaped her as the head of his cock hit a particularly sensitive spot within her. She bit the inside of her cheek and ground down harder on him, doing it again. Her toes curled as hot jolts of electricity seemed to shoot through her with every roll of her hips, every thrust from him that drove him deeper into her. “All that matters now is that we…” She gasped again and had to swallow harshly. “That we’re together again.”

“Shit,” he breathed as she ground down on him, making him moan softly. It was tender, unrushed. A slow build that reminded him with every movement that she was with him, in every sense of the word. “I have you, love. I have you.” He moved his hands, cradling her neck and angling her face slightly as he plundered her mouth, trying to stave off the orgasm that was steadily growing. “I want you, Cass, I want to spend the entire night just enjoying you, but I don’t think I can wait much longer on this round. It’s been too long.”

She nodded eagerly, moving her hips a little faster, nearly sobbing from the pleasure that built low in her belly and radiated through her entire body. She was so close already, feeling her body tightening around his thick length, her core beginning to throb. Her eyes clenched shut as she finally hit her peak, waves of pleasure crashing over her, and she screamed out the next moment. “Varric!” she cried, riding out her orgasm until it left her nearly breathless. She shivered and drew a deep breath, determined to return the pleasure to him, and lifted herself up to plunge back down on him.

He hissed as she came around him, only to slam back down onto his cock as she rode out her orgasm. He cried the moment later as their eyes met again and he felt himself slip over that edge at the look of sheer passion in her eyes and he curled up around her as he came, his cock twitching deeply within her. “Cassandra,” he sighed as he breathed in her sweat soaked skin, sweet upon his tongue, “Mmm, I think I could write about four more Swords and Shields after that.”

It took her a moment to even realize he’d spoken. She was so content in that moment, so satisfied, her brain wasn’t keeping up with everything around her. She quirked an eyebrow and looked down at him, still gently rolling her hips. “Only four?” she asked and squeezed her muscles tightly around him. “I had higher expectations than that, dwarf.”

Varric groaned softly as she moved around his softening cock and he knew it wouldn’t take him long to be ready for round two. “Mm, well that’s because I’ve got a gorgeous woman in my lap. It’s making it a little harder to think of good plot lines.” He let his hands drop to her thighs and he ran them over the smooth skin there a few times before he squeezed her ass appreciatively. Maker help him, he couldn’t stop looking at her face, letting his eyes skim over every inch of her. How close he had been to losing everything scared him more than he wanted to admit.

She chuckled at that and leaned down to kiss him. It felt good to tease and joke with him. She thought she missed that part just as much as anything. “It is good you did not die,” she said, a smirk playing across her lips as she rested her forehead against his, staring into his eyes. “Who else would I have been able to banter with? I would have spent the rest of my days feeling very lost.”

He smiled at her, kissing her lips a moment before he looked her over again. “Well, you could always banter with Sparkler. Maybe Tiny. If you were feeling daring, you could have banter with Solas, I’d pay a few royals to see him really banter with someone.” He sighed out as he let his arms move to rest around her, enjoying the feeling of her chest against his own. “I’m glad I didn’t die either,” he murmured quietly, honestly, “Being out there, nearly dying alone. It does things to you. This time I didn’t have the luxury of being stranded with anyone. Gave me a lot of time to think, to really think about what I wanted.”

Cassandra sat back a little in his lap, running her hands over his shoulders as she studied the expression on his face. “Really? I barely had time to think about anything besides finding you. Well, that and arguing that I knew you were still alive,” she said, an almost smug little smirk touching her lips. “I still have not decided if I should apologize to Cullen and Lindsey for arguing so much with them, or if I should yell ‘I told you so’ at them.” She almost snickered at her own joke, but focused on Varric again the next moment, her expression soft but serious again. “What is it that you want?”

Varric studied her, a smile tugging at the corner of his lips as he lifted a hand and cupped her cheek. “Just you,” he said softly, brushing his thumb over her soft lips, “You were the only thing on my mind. I knew that when I found you again, the only thing I wanted to do was to go back to Kirkwall and marry you. Or we could go to Nevarra. Maybe after I get the reconstruction efforts started in Kirkwall, but it doesn’t matter. As long as you are there with me, keeping me honest, I don’t care.”

She shook her head a little too quickly. “I have no desire to return to Nevarra,” she said. “We will go to Kirkwall, help as much as we can.” She rolled her hips again and nearly smirked when she felt him start to harden within her. Playfully, she grabbed the back of his hair and pulled his head back so she could look down into his eyes. “And I will always keep you honest,” she purred and dipped her head to kiss him again. “Always.”


	22. Chapter 22

“So, Honnleath?” Jennifer asked her sister as she watched Cullen loading up a wagon with their meager belongings. He insisted because of Lindsey’s pregnancy that they take the wagon rather than horses. She had to admit it would be a good idea. “You know that’s where Shale comes from.” She smacked her head with her hand a moment later, “Ah shit, you never played Origins, did you?” She laughed at that and studied her sister, determined to not tear up. She drew her into a tight hug the next moment. “You send me letters every now and then. And tell me when you are due. I want to be there when the little one is born.” 

Lindsey nodded and hugged her sister tightly. “You’d better be there,” she said, screwing up her face, but the tears fell anyway. She swallowed hard, trying to get rid of the knot in her throat. She’d never been away from her sister before, not really, not like this. She sniffled and buried her face in Jennifer’s shoulder. “I’m half-tempted to knock you out and stash you in the back of the wagon,” she admitted through her tears. She wanted to blame it on the hormones, but she knew deep down that she would’ve been sobbing like this anyway, pregnant or not.

Dorian raised an eyebrow as he approached the sisters. “Now now, none of that. If you start crying, I’ll start crying and then my eyeliner will run and I’ll look a mess. You don’t want that, do you?” he asked them, only half serious as he opened his arms, drawing the both of them into a hug. “I want to be there when the little one is born as well. Since I helped you with all that trouble, I think I deserve to see the fruits of our labor. But not the actual labor, I have a suspicion that isn’t my cup of tea. But afterwards!” He nodded and pulled back smiling at them both, later he would vehemently deny that there were tears gathering in his own eyes. 

Lindsey scrubbed at her eyes with the heel of her hand, a watery laugh escaping her. “Aww, Dorian, you don’t want to be there for the messy part?” she managed to tease. She giggled again at the way he wrinkled his nose. “Don’t do that. Your face might stick that way.” 

She gave Bull a hug and said her goodbyes to him before she hugged Cassandra, then she turned to Varric. Another hard lump formed in her throat as she looked at the dwarf, thinking back on all they’d been through, how close they’d become. She flung her arms around his neck, hugging him tightly. “I’m going to miss you,” she said in a shaky whisper. 

Varric hugged Lindsey back tightly, he could feel his eyes prickling as he squeezed them shut, trying to force the tears back, remembering everything that they had gone through together. “It’s been one hell of a ride, hasn’t it, Freckles?” he asked as he rubbed at her back a moment before he pulled back, holding her at arm’s length, “But you know this isn’t goodbye. Not by a longshot. You and Curly are always welcome in Kirkwall. I’ll have a room set up for you on reserve in the Hanged Man just in case you decide to visit. Shit.” He lifted a hand to his face, flicking away the tears that made it hard to see. “I don’t think I’ll ever be able to repay you for what you’ve done for me.”

“I think we’re square. You’ve done a lot for me too,” she said. “And you both better come visit us in Honnleath,” she added, looking between him and Cassandra. It broke her heart to think of leaving her friends, and especially her sister, but Varric was right. This wasn’t goodbye. They would all see each other again soon. She hugged the dwarf one more time, then forced herself to pull away, and turned her attention to Solas instead. “And you,” she said, trying to sound stern, but the effect was ruined by her tears, “You better take good care of my sister and that little girl.”

“I would not dream of doing otherwise,” Solas assured her. He opened his arms and allowed her to hug him. “We will see you soon,” he promised, then pulled back and took her hand as if to shake it. “A parting gift,” he said, a blue light forming around their hands that seemed to flow from her to him. “I release you from your oath.”

Lindsey’s eyes went wide as she felt it happen, and a relief seemed to flow through her. When the magic seemed to break, she stared in awe at her hand. “Thank you,” she breathed and hugged him again. “I’m glad my sister has you,” she whispered, then pulled away, going to hug her sister again. “I guess he’s not so bad after all,” she murmured teasingly.

Jennifer smiled at Lindsey, looking over at Solas. He had a look on his face that made her heart do flips and she felt a warmth fill her at the kindness she saw. “He does grow on you, doesn’t he?” she teased back and smiled at her, kissing her sister’s cheek before hugging her tightly, “You take care of that ex-Templar of yours.” She winked over at Cullen who had finally walked over to them all. “And you had better be watching after my sister and that little one. And the dog too,” she said firmly before she hugged him.

Cullen chuckled and hugged her back. “I am not entirely certain if it is possible to keep your sister out of trouble, but I will do my best. And thank you, for everything that you have done.” He looked over at Lindsey, smiling warmly at her. “I’m certain if we all did not have each other, our fates would have been very different and not in a good way,” he said as he pulled back from her and offered his hand to Solas. “It’s been an honor fighting at your side, Solas.”

Solas inclined his head and shook Cullen’s hand. “Safe travels, Commander,” he said, stepping back to wrap his arm around Jennifer’s shoulders. “We will see you soon, I’m certain,” he said smoothly, though the last thing on his mind was visiting anyone. He needed to speak with Abelas, to decide what their next move was. Now that he had Jennifer and Olivia back with him, he could focus once again on what was to be done about the Veil, about helping the elves, and preventing the two worlds from total destruction. And though he knew Jennifer would be sad to see her friends go, all of it would be easier once everyone had parted ways.

Abelas stood to the side, watching as everyone got their things together, saying their goodbyes and loaded up wagons. The Qunari and the Tevinter would be traveling with Krem on horses to locate those who were still missing from Skyhold before deciding where they wanted to go. He suspected that they would not part from one another for a lifetime. Cassandra and Varric were to return to Kirkwall as Cullen and Lindsey were to travel to Honnleath. As for the rest of them, they would travel with Solas. He let a smile curl his lips as he looked down at his side to Elowyn, his arm around her protectively. It was going to be quite the journey.  

Varric turned to Solas, approaching the elf with a sad look in his eye as he held out his hand. “Chuckles,” he said, for once not certain what to say exactly and he gestured to the side, a little bit away from the rest of the group saying their goodbyes, “Seems like you have one hell of a choice ahead of you. I wouldn’t blame you, putting it all aside to look after that little girl of yours.” He sighed and rubbed the back of his head. “I wish I knew what to do. What was right. I don’t think there is a right or wrong in this situation. And for the record, you aren’t the villain you think you are.”

Solas’ expression remained stoic, though Varric’s words lanced his heart. Oh, how he wished that was true. “I appreciate your vote of confidence, Varric,” he said, taking the dwarf’s hand in his own. “I have not forgotten my promise to you. If it is possible, I will save Hawke from the Fade. He does not belong there.” Though with the Inquisitor dead and the orb destroyed, Solas still didn’t know how to go about fixing any of these problems. He was no closer to solving his problems than he had been before joining the Inquisition.

“You do what you can. I have a feeling Hawke is in good hands until rescue comes.” He rubbed at the back of his head. “Look, this whole Fade business with the Veil and the other world. It doesn’t set right with me. Something’s happening that we can’t control and the only way to fix that might be the worst thing we can think of. Just don’t shoulder all of that shit on your own. You keep more secrets than are healthy for you. You think you can’t share them because you are afraid of how they will be received. But don’t they deserve to know? To help decide the fate of this world?”

“We shall see,” Solas answered cryptically, the politely stoic expression on his face never waivering. “But I suspect you have more pressing matters to attend to in the meantime,” he said, casting a glance over at Cassandra who had finished saying her goodbyes and was already mounted on her horse. A soft chuckle escaped him, and he gave Varric’s hand a firm shake before releasing him. “I believe the Seeker may leave without you if you do not hurry, Master Tethras. Do not worry yourself, my friend. We will be in touch. Things will be made right again.”

Varric chuckled. “Let’s hope so,” he said as he walked with elf back to the group and reached up for Cassandra, letting her tug him up onto the horse. He looked back over the group as they got into their wagons and he laughed. “Hey Chuckles, watch out for that dragon. Better remind Firefly that they get bigger than that pocket monster she’s got now,” he said as he nodded to the little thing perched on her shoulder.

Solas rolled his eyes to the sky, then squeezed them shut in an attempt to keep his patience. “It is a conversation she keeps effectively avoiding,” he said, his tone almost strained. He glanced over at his vhenan, and a sigh escaped him as she flashed him a toothy smile and batted her eyes. He slowly shook his head at her as the dragon draped itself around her neck. He lowered his voice so only Varric would hear him, “She cannot avoid the subject forever, no matter how hard she tries.”

Dorian laughed out loud as he pulled himself up onto his own horse. “That is absolutely adorable. That you think you will be able to get the upper hand over her. Women are tricksy creatures Solas. Best to just nod your head and smile,” he said as he moved his horse over to Bull and Krem, “But do try to keep her out of trouble for a little while.”

“I shall try,” Solas said, though he felt that setting the world right again would be an easier task than separating Jennifer from her new pet. He stepped back and put his arm around Jennifer’s waist, casting a leery glance at the dragon before he looked at their friends who were ready to depart. His eyebrows raised as the saddlebag on Dorian’s horse shook, and the cat popped its head up to look at them. It licked its whiskers, then disappeared back down into the bag. “Well, looks like he decided to part ways with us as well.”

Jennifer laughed as she saw the cat vanish into the bag. “Well well, I wondered where he had gotten off to.” She smiled at Dorian. “Keep him out of trouble and if you give him a little cream now and then, he won’t scratch you as often,” she said with a wink as the mage rolled his eyes before giving her a wink. She sighed contently as she looked around at her friends as they were ready to head out. 

Varric chuckled at the look on her face, “I’ve said it before, I’ll say it again. We’ll see you later.”

Solas watched as they departed, heading down the road that would eventually fork and take them all in different directions. They stood there and watched until they were out of sight, then he pressed a firm kiss to Jennifer’s forehead. “You will see them again, Vhenan,” he said softly and rubbed her back. In truth, he was a little relieved to see them go. He had a lot of work ahead of him and without the distraction of so many others, he would finally be able to focus. He turned back towards the tavern, exchanging a pointed look with Abelas. “Come, lethallin. We have much to discuss.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thanks everyone who gave kudos and left comments! Your encouragement means more to jlcamp and I than you know. We will start the last part of this series sometime in the next few days.


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